Does *anyone* think Claire Verity's methods are kind of OK and we are hugely overreacting?

[Pruners]

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I don't even think there's anything wrong with encouraging a routine. But enforcing a routine on a newborn who just wants to feed and be held close to mum is incredibly cruel.

mistypeaks - I wondered if she was offered tea at strict 6 hour intervals. God help her if she's thiursty in between.

How about a slap on a strict 6 minute basis? (her not you!!)

I wanted to cry for those poor babies

Her 'methods' are inhuman IMO. The parents were clearly fighting their instincts.

not

Long night last night...

I think could hear nationwide gasp as she said 'i really dont know why anyone needs to pick up a baby', and a frenzy of texting. She really does seem to dislike children and have a lot of issues of her own. Essentially she would have you show the baby no emotion at all, feed change and put it away from you, at all times - well you could achieve the same result with a stint in a 1980s Romanian ophanage. She really does seem unhinged and those poor parents when they look back on how they treated their newborns.

I think the thought process is essentially good, getting into a routine and trying to get baby to sleep through the night and feed at regaular intervalss, I think her methods were wrong. I think it is ok to put baby in their own room (altho personally prefer to keep them with me for a period of time) I also think it is ok to put them down and walk away and perhaps even let them cry a little, but I do think you have to go back and sooth, you cant just leave them. Also, i thought it was good logic that fresh air makes baby tired, but didnt understand why you couldnt go for a walk or sit in the garden with a coffee instead of leaving them out there.

And, the affection aspect, well i couldnt reallunderstand the logic in that at all. We want to love our babies simple as that.

I also think her way instigates all these things far too early... you need to get used to baby and baby needs to get used to you before you can start a menaingful routine.

Agree with stealth!
A baby-led routine is great...a babyless so-called experts routine is not
I do sometimes wonder why people have babies if they don't want their lifestyle to change. You are now a family - 3 people(or more!) - and things are going to change.
Yes, occasionally I feel like I miss my previous life, and then dd tells a joke, or hugs me or something and I wouldn't swap it for the world.
Can't believe that people have so much money to throw away on nutters.

Not on this planet.

I thought her methods were totally wrong for me BUT the night time routine did remind me of when my ds1 was in hospital as a newborn following an operation to fix his heart.

Our hospital followed a routine of low lighting from 8 pm and waking the baby every 3 hours for a feed. Most parents left their babies at night so that the nursing staff could look after them. DH and I were pretty much the only people who took it in turns to care for our ds round the clock although we pretty much followed the lead of the staff and their routine as it was difficult to deviate. When ds1 was at home again he was sleeping through from 12 weeks and he is the only child of mine to have done so. I don't think that it is coincidence. CV's methods did leave me feeling cold but some parts of her routine really aren't dissimilar to ds1's treatment in hospital and he thrived .

I think a sensible combination of all three methods might get it about right !! I don't hold with any of this 'you must do it this way or else...' - everyone should see what works for them...however, I do think that people who are bound,literally,to their baby day and night are making a rod for their own backs... fwiw -ds is now ten, slept in a carrycot by our bed for about 3 months, then into his own room, rarely slept in our bed (and only if I fell asleep after feeding him - usually find in stuck down at the bottom of the duvet) .

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Oh gawd! I think I'm glad I didn't watch it...

a ROUTINE is fine but blatant child abuse is not. Sorry but you HAVE to cuddle a baby, you just have to. Bagpuss I'm sure your lo had cuddles whilst in hospital (or if he was to poorly at least stroking and eye contact)

It's about the money, isn't it? Does she really get £1000 a day for peddling this crap?

How much?!?!? So now its robbery with violence (i felt violent anyway!)

As someone else has already mentioned, none of the methods might be ideal, but it's a lot less likely that the couples following the other 2 experts will look back in horror and regret, even if they don't actually keep it up.

did you notice she kept on referring the the baby as 'it'?

I actually stayed awake worrying about the poor babies. I don't even think that 'no lasting harm' is any defence of this method. What about suffering in the present?

Yes he did but he still isn't a very cuddly child compared to his siblings and I do think that his early routine did play a part in how he is now IYSWIM? Sadly it couldn't be avoided though. I did feel very sorry for the mother crying while her tiny dd was wailing upstairs though, there was no sense to it .

Agree StealthPolarBear.

Just imagine you feed your baby you put it outside with the door shut so you dont hear it just a couple of things what could happen

1. baby vomits after feed and chokes to death
2. cat gets in pram and smothers baby
3. baby has apnoe (as my daughter did whilst sleeping in her chair aged 2 weeks) and nobody notices so baby dies

What really gets me mad is this woman has no kids herself she is a nutter she has never felt that bond and I can almost predict that if she had a baby she would be in bits like all the other mothers are when she treats there baby like a little pest.

FFS why get pregnant just to ignore it when it's here?

Am I the only one thinking that a routine is actually very restrictive and the routine would end up controling all your decisions? I.e. I have a friend who followed the GF routine and she would say things like I can't go out for a coffee baby needs to be in cot at this time, or can't go for a walk because DD can't sleep for another hour or so, or can't go shopping because baby will not have her feed on time, etc.

I never said things like that, my kids always come with me wherever I go and sleep wherever and had milk when they are hungry. it's much easier to keep a normal l1ife if the kids are 'flexible.'

SOmeone made a good point about the riskiness of such methods for prem (or unwell in any way) babies, but in general, given that at least 2 generations were brought up that way and neither all died nor all turned into sociopaths, it's probably not that harmful. Remember that all life is a risk and all child-rearing methods carry some risk (you might smother your LO by co-sleeping_ not common but *feasible) and it's very unlikely that any programme makers would be using or advocating a method universally agreed to be seriously dangerous to newborns.

But I'd have told the bitch to fuck off in about 5 minutes.

Now my 2 dds were both cuddled/routined in exactly the same way as one another. dd2 is very very stubborn independant and very much less cuddly than her big sister so it's nothing to do with that. They're just different. bagpuss i'm sure its the same with your little one - some people are just less cuddly than others. She is starting to be a little more cuddly (but only if she initiates it - little madam!)

IMO anything that goes against your instincts as a new mother is bad (& could imo interfere with bonding too...) Seeing those mothers fighting their instincts was as hard as seeing CV's neglect "care" for the babies