Eurovision: The Results

[RedToothBrush]

You've Survived Flat Madge.

Well Done.

Here are the finalists

1. Malta - Maltese Molly And Her Pet Chameleon and Support Socks
2. Albania - Rylan’s Nashers Channel Khalessi Yodelling
3. Czech Republic - The Wiggles EuroFwend
4. Germany - Meghan Markle and LeAnn Rimes
5. Russia - Vanity Shower Screens
6. Denmark - Ladders and Clouds
7. San Marino - Right Said Fred Goes to Benidorm
8. North Macedonia - Mel Off Eastenders
9. Sweden - Gospel Lionel Richie

10. Slovenia - Dull and In Love. Apparently. Snore. Slow-venia. Creepy 11. Cyprus - Chandelier pants and PVC 12. Netherlands - A Nice Moody Ballad from Duncan the Dutchman 13. Greece - Nasally Don't Tell The Bride. 14. Israel - Is it Ross or Howard? What Freddie Mercury would have looked like had Borat played him. Is it David Blaine? 15. Norway - Ken The Spirited Club Style Yoiker. Come on Barbie! 16. United Kingdom - The John Lewis Christmas Ad 2019 17. Iceland - Do I Really Need to Remind You?!! Mad Max the Musical. 18. Estonia - Mr Wholesome with the Disappearing Guitar 19. Belarus - Britney Belarus 20. Azerbaijan - Shut Up! Lazzzzeerrrssss 21. France - Wigman. Gaga's Little Bro. 22. Italy - It wasn't me. Shaggy 2.0 23. Serbia - Wicked Ice Queen Angelina Jolie's Stunt Leg 24. Switzerland - Red Dirty Dancers and Rylan’s Outfit 25. Australia - Glenda The Good Witch on a Bouncy Stick. 26. Spain - Mel C and Bryan Adams Changing Rooms on IKEA Kallax Shelves

I had to look up the song, it made no impression on me whatsoever so I didn't remember it. To be blunt it's the sort of innuendo-heavy fnar fnar humour that seems to go down well in Britain but I don't think Eurovision is the right place. Willing to bet you a lot that the innuendos went over peoples heads a lot. I dunno, it was a bit boring, wasn't it?

See, I thought that next year's entry could be the winner of the upcoming Ru Paul's Drag Race UK, provided they can sing as well as lip sync for their life.
Graham Norton's on that panel so he can put it to them - winner does Eurovision in feathers and sequins, high camp and high glam with some drag queens who had to sashay away as backing dancers. They do a slut drop half way through the routine before the key change.
We could do a lot worse.

What ever happened to Katrina and the Waves. Won Eurovision and within a couple of years gone

To be fair, their Eurovision entry was a bit of a fluke. It was originally written for the Samaritans who turned it down, and was put forward for Eurovision on a whim. They had been an established band long before Eurovision happened and individually went on to bigger and better things afterwards.

it was originally written for the Samaritans
Trivia gold there fleas

I just spent half an hour listening through uk entries from 2009.

A lot of very competent songs, iykwim. Solidly composed like. But the minor major theory does hold rather. Engelbert’s isn’t bad on Spotify tbh. It did nothing for me on stage if I recall correctly though. Bonnie’s wasn’t bad either but she went flat on stage a little bit. Had it been a minor key one like her big hits she might’ve had it. She and next years Molly ended up 19th and 17th places. I do rather think that they could have climbed if people had had the benefit of repetition there (semis). 2015 and 2016 were just not good. 2017 Lucie Jones was very good tbf but I think that was a ballad heavy year? Bad luck altogether. She got 15th place and was sort of robbed. With repetition it would have been better I think. Fecking Portugal won. I wasn’t a huge fan of that one. Surie the year after was such a great performer but in all honesty not the best song. A bit love love peace love love. She deserved a better song.

stevenperkins.wordpress.com/2019/05/19/eurovision-2019-the-definitive-ish-ranking/

Insider knowledge Rage. . I cannot divulge.

...for an equivalent standard of song, we tend to pick up fewer of these points than other countries. This is where politics are against the UK.
Oubliette Bravo

How do you objectively define 'an equivalent standard of song'?

If one song finishes last and one song finishes 13th then they are demonstrably not the equivalent standard of song. One song had enough fans and jury votes to vote it to 13th while the other tanked with the voting public and the juries.

Why would a jury member from any of the 20 non EU countries that entered the ESC this year have some political axe to grind against the UK?

As it turns out, this year the UK got most of its votes (13) from the jury vote. Ireland accounted for the other three votes, bringing a total of 16. Is it neighbourly voting or something else when Ireland votes for a UK entry?

But even though the jury vote awarded us more, poor Michael didn't fare too well when it came to those votes, either. He earned a meagre 13 points from the judges.

Belarus were the kindest, giving us five points. Norway, Hungary and Armenia each awarded us two points, while Switzerland and Georgia threw us one point each.

Meanwhile, when it came to who the British public gave their votes to, our douze points went to Norway, while we handed 10 to Australia and 8 to Iceland.
www.digitalspy.com/tv/reality-tv/a27518306/eurovision-2019-countries-voted-for-uk-public-vote/

x-post there to some extent with RageAgainstTheVendingMachine

We need to enter someone like Rag n Bone Man. He'd be perfect.

Rage, thank you for another excellent link! Have been reading it all morning

Am also listening to Eurovision playlists on Spotify.

Tell me please, how do you bookmark a thread so I could come to it later? If I answer on the thread then it's on my watch list but if I only read then it's not. Sorry to divert you from the topic but I just thought I have to ask somewhere .

sunny I'm on my PC - If I move my mouse towards any post a bookmark tab comes up. I can also click on Watch List at the top.
On a mobile phone or kindle it might all look different though.

@Itssosunny on a iPhone or iPad using the mobile version (not the classic), swipe the post you want to bookmark left. Three options appear, one of which is bookmark.

RageAgainstTheVendingMachine and
Myimaginarycathasfleas, many thanks! I check Mumsnet on my mobile phone using a browser. Under every reply there are 3 dots in the bottom right corner. There are bookmarks in there. Cool and thank you so much! I always wonder about some interesting posts but never can find them a few days later

I use a browser too and I took two screenshots for you. First one shows the little arrow at the top beside the forum title (a bit confusing). Hit the arrow and you get the menu in pic 2 - red arrow points to “unwatch this thread” which is of course watch this thread if you’re not doing so already. That’s how you follow a thread you don’t want to post on, bookmarking the posts as you go to see how far along you are.

banivani, I've just done it! Hooray and many thanks!

I hope you now can follow much drama

In other news Sweden made top 5 because they made an error in the points counting on the night. Top 5 y’all.

It looks like they’ve revised the fictitious Belarus jury votes. Quite a few countries have changed places (and the jury vote was now won by N. Macedonia rather than Sweden).

And that seems much more likely, tbh. Still - top 5, dignity intact rather ;)

We've lost points though apparently after recalculation. Down from 16 to 11. Even more bottom.🙁

Aw, that's a shame. And I think it's sloppy too, the points should work during the show. Sure the wee robots do all the work.

It’s quite interesting to see how many countries have changed position based on one jury’s scoring being changed. And by more than a single place in some instances (e.g. France, Malta).

We've lost points though apparently after recalculation. Down from 16 to 11. Even more bottom.

Talk about kicking somebody when they're already down. It's like pointing at a drunk tramp in a doorway and loudly informing everybody that he's currently wetting himself.

Our song was quite meh and the visuals were extremely unexciting, but Michael gave it a very good shot with what he'd been given to work with.