lucysnowe I was very new to social work but fortunately I had heard of "frozen awareness or frozen watchfulness." Ok - I'll tell you about it. I had been visiting a family where there were 2 children (the baby I refer to) and a little boy of almost 2yrs. The HV had raised concerns and I got the case. I was really worried because the mother had LDs and was living with a bloke who was not the father of either child, and very controlling and it was evident that the mother was scared of him.
On one visit I asked in the little boy (C) had any toys and stepfather (D) said yes he had and told C to go and fetch his trike. C did this in a robotic fashion and stood with the trike waiting for Ds instructions and when told to ride it he was again robotic. The baby seemed ok but obviously my concern grew. Fortunately I was 37 when I qualified and had 2 children of my own.
On another visit I saw the baby (K) lying in a pram as the way I have described her. I watched for quite a while and she was "frozen" inthat she didn't move or make a sound but her eyes moved to (D) and watched. She was like a rabbit caught in the headlines, and I knew that the baby was being abused by this man. Nonetheless on the advice on my senior I should keep visiting x 3 per week, some without arrangement. The family lived in a flat which was not bad really. Quite clean and tidy.
However on one of my visits, D was on the sofa holding K and I asked where C was and D replied "Oh he's in his bedroom hibernating" so I went to find him. It was really awful because C was crouched ina small space between the end of his bed and the wall, and had bruising to his cheeks, chin and ears. I picked him up and his little body was rigid. I asked what had happened and D said he had fallen out of bed, but this was ridiculous. I said I needed to take C to the GP about his injuries - D got agitated, raised his voice and said "Oh take him then" - the mother (L) came with me and the difference in C once he was away from D was amazing. He was like a normal 2 year old, jumping about etc. The GP confirmed the injuries were non accidental and looked like Colin had been hit quite forcefully in his face.
I then remembered that D wore big rings on every finger and told the GP and he said that the injuries were entirely consistent with being hit hard but with some kind of implement and in this case rings on D's fingers. L cried but confirmed that this is what had happened. She also asked if we would remove baby (K) because D was shaking her. I obtained a Place of Safety Order from a magistrate after he had heard the facts (they are called Emergency Protection Orders now) which meant that both children could be removed. We already had C, so I arranged for the police to accompany me to remove K and serve the Place of Safety Order on D, although he was not infact related to the children. (By this time it wa about 9.00 pm!) I went in and picked up K with the police standing in the doorway, but in fact D was quite calm about the whole thing and all he wanted to know was "where was L"
I placed both children in foster homes that night (different ones) as that was all that was avilable but the children were too young to be worried about being separated. Both lovely experienced carers. I have to say that baby K was a particularly beautiful baby and when I went with the foster mum the following day to the GP for K to be checked over, he commented on thisd himself!
Anyway the end of the story is that I placed C for adoption with a really nice couple (he was a vicar and they had 3 children of their own) and it was wonderful to see C playing in the garden and tree house with the other kids.
As for K - well the foster carers (who had fostered numerous babies) fell in love with K and asked if she could be considered to adopt her. We weren't that keen because L and D knew where the foster carers lived. However in the end we agreed. They had 2 kids of their own about 10 and 12 at the time. SO that's what happened and as far as I am aware she thrived with this lovely couple. I used to see her when they turned up for the foster carers and adoptors christmas parties etc and she was fine.
Needless to say L and D contested the adoption and there was a long hearing. At one point their lawyer asked me if C had been playing "peep o" when he was behind the bed!! I told him I knew the difference between a child playing peep o and a frightened child and this was a frightened child.
Both D and L went on to get hooked up with new partners and it was no longer my case but I think all Ds children were removed. He actually had LDs himself and had been to a weekly boarding school in the area for children with LDs and challenging behaviour. That school was actually closed when it was discovered that some of the staff were sexually abusing the boys and there was "child in child abuse" going on too, so who knows what D suffered. This is why I keep saying in these posts that every abused child I have come across in a long career of social work has always had at least one of the parents mostly both People then get angry and say they were abused as a child but didn't go on to abuse their children but that is not what I a saying IFYSWIM.
I have also been challenged that the cycle of deprivation can be broken but no govt has been able to find a way, and for me, I don't believe that it can be broken in entirety.
Sorry for the long post - it just brought it all back to me.....NNx