Teen refusing to attend school and concerns about fines or court

55 replies

OnePeachBiscuit · 18/09/2026 12:32

Hi all, does anyone have any experience of their teen not going to school and facing fines / court ? I tried everything with school to get him in. He just wont go. He's so smart, isnt being bullied, has friends. I offered the option of me home schooling him for math and english but he wont even pick up a pen.

OP posts:

tokennamechange · 20/09/2026 19:52

BeLovingPoster · 20/09/2026 16:11

Sorry to hear this, I understand how stressful this is, I have recently been through similar with my child. I cant believe some of the suggestions, such as taking away all devices, and turning off the heating when it's cold, this does not work, and as home is his safe place, why make homelife so miserable. He could then start running away. I would take him to the GP, it is unlikely he has just started to decide to sod school. School kept saying my daughter was fine in school, and that it must be a home problem, and were threatening with fines. She was suffering with Autistic burnout after years of masking, and recieved a diagnosis this week. After months of not being at school, she has returned this term . I hope things improve.

Home can still be his safe space. Nobody is advising keeping him locked up on bread and water.
It can even be his fun space where he can relax by playing x-box etc.
Just not within school hours.

Not wanting to go to school is one thing, refusing to do any work at all, is another. You'd think if he was being bullied or something was terribly wrong then he'd be willing to do whatever it took to not go, i.e. enthusiastically participate in home schooling to support it as a viable alternative.

If only giving him access to his x box for 8 hours a day rather than 24 is cruel and terrible parenting then it's no wonder so many kids today are complete non-starters.

Original poster

OnePeachBiscuit · 21/09/2026 09:46

TeenToTwenties · 19/09/2026 14:46

Won't or Can't ?

My DD missed all y11 as she never returned after covid struck in y10. Counselling and antidepressants helped but it was/is a long long road.

how did you avoid fines and court ? Illness ?

OP posts:

Whyyes · 21/09/2026 09:51

No Xbox, skateboarding, tv or phone during school hours. Only give access to these things out of school hours in the late afternoon/evening.
Go to the GP to check if he may have depression or something else going on and if they can refer him

TeenToTwenties · 21/09/2026 10:41

OnePeachBiscuit · 21/09/2026 09:46

how did you avoid fines and court ? Illness ?

Show quote history

School accepted she was ill with her mental health. We kept in touch and frankly I expect they had other pupils who were more of a concern to worry about at that time.

PestoPastaLife · 22/09/2026 20:16

OnePeachBiscuit · 18/09/2026 13:37

daily chats. he says school dont care but they do. they've been very supportive, offering a reduced timetable, only come in for the things you like. All priviledges removed, no phone all that but as you say I worry something else is going on. I just need to get him thorough whatever this is.

He sleeps, plays xbox and goes skateboarding. thats it.

Show quote history

Take the Xbox and skateboard away?

Flip

1 2 3