DD does not want to come on another caravan holiday next summer

[Charlotte350]

Have been discussing family holidays over dinner today and my DD going on 15 said "if it's another caravan holiday to Mabel thorpe I'm not coming" she stated how much she hates it and I said well in that case you will have to stay with grandparents...she then said "I would be happy staying at home and just have a few friends over and I said no and tbh she was really rude and back chatting me while I said calmly what my reasons were. I think she should come on the holiday, however I don't want her spoiling it with moodiness if she doesn't want to be there so I will be asking grandparents to have her it would only be for the week. I'm not leaving a 15 year old home alone for a week. Has anyone else left a teenager with a relative/ grandparents while on holiday when they don't want to go?

When I was young almost no one took holidays. It was maybe 6 or 7 years if that, that we had an actual holiday away. Now people think they need to go at least once every year. Practically no one went on holidays 'every year' when I grew up. It was a rarity. And then the holidays were really well and truly actually worth it. I'd rather save up for several years and take the kids on a real, actual proper holiday. Than drag them in a dank caravan every year to somewhere they'd rather not go for a holiday that retirees go on. Quality, over quantity.

Totally. It's like the OP does not understand children. They think like a really old retired person.

So a teenager should be forced along?! Because you didn’t have holidays when you were younger? It sounds no fun to me

Agree with the above except for the "at 16 she could stay home alone" bit! Definitely not advisable 😵

A 16 year old is more than capable of staying at home! They used to go out to work or community college. As long as a neighbour or a friend checks on them every now and then, there is no reason why they can't. Parents these days wrap their kids in cotton wool to the extent that when they do leave home, they cannot cope.

If a 16 year old cannot be left at home for a week (with a neighbour or someone checking in on them every now and then), the parent has demonstrably failed in parenting.

So how does a really old retired person think then PP? 🤔🙄

Does her mental health not matter then? It's hell for a teenager, especially a female to not be allowed privacy, to be forced to be forced to use a campsite shower room where god knows who could be lurking, she's got no space, nowhere to dress or undress in private in a towing caravan and stuck in a caravan with 4 noisy young siblings! Try to have a clue here and be less intent on inflicting so much suffering and making it distressing rather than any kind of holiday.

We got our first touring caravan just as the older kids kids left home, and eventually had a little more money we tented before that, but mainly Devon, Dorset and Cornwall. DD came with us to the Peak District and Suffolk in the van aged 15-16 but did her own thing after that.
I'm 59 and look for activities when looking for places to go..mountain biking and cycling as well as cultural, castles, houses, gardens, history, zoos, steam trains. I couldn't just sit on a beach here or abroad.

That’s fair enough and one of my friends DS has one and loves. Choosing it is fine but not if you are dragged along

I tell you what I do that I don’t like. I take my kids to see movies I wish not to see I’ve been to concerts of which I don’t like the music, I’ve been to countless theme parks in which I have terrible motion sickness & I endure often feeling incredibly ill after, I’m a taxi taking my kids & their friends to various places they’ve organised to go, sacrificing my own social arrangements. I’ve even gone on holidays I wish not to go. Disney world isn’t my holiday of choice neither was Dubai but I’ve booked, paid & gone on them. All with a smile & yes I’ve created some great & fond memories but we’ve also had good times in places they’ve not wanted to go to. cook when I don’t want to. I don’t do this for just one week a year. I do it everyday, every school holiday & every weekend. My kids and many others are indulged every day of their lives. Asking for one week isn’t unreasonable & it shouldn’t be seen as such. I’m not forcing my kids to like things they don’t but if I taught them anything I hope they’ve learnt to tolerate some things for someone who loves them does so much. So they don’t grow up being inconsiderate & utterly selfish

I gave up on family holidays when I was 15. A fortnight in a caravan in the rain in Torquay did it for me. Never again.
Are there things she’d like to do? A week learning to windsurf? Camping with friends? (And someone older to keep an eye) what would she actually like to do?

It’s a week with her family. Not a torture chamber. Jeez.

Because they are your children. Parents make sacrifices as it is our choice to have children. The children don’t have to make sacrifices

I don’t even think it’s the actual location at all. It’s the fact there’s zero personal space in a tiny caravan with your parents and three small children. You’re on top of each other and it stops being fun and gets very awkward and uncomfortable once you’ve gone through puberty. Or you’re pushed out into sleeping into the awning. It’s miserable.

A caravan big enough for 4 kids as well as adults is likely to have a shower room. I've never used site facilities for showering. But certainly being away with much younger siblings probably wouldn't fly with most teens regardless of space.
Edit..quoted wrong person...sorry..😁

Not sure tourers do

Certainly do...mine is currently sat on my driveway, I tow it.

Yeah & it’s also my job to raise kids that are considerate & functioning adults so their chances of having happy & healthy relationships makes their life a more contented one. That requires the skill of compromise. I’ve had kids for my own selfish reasons that’s granted, but to not teach them basic skills of life is to do them a massive miss service. I suppose having rules on keeping their room clean & tidy & teaching them how to cook is also unfair you know because I gave them life I should forever clean up after them & feed them.

You are taking this very personally! Teenagers not wanting to go somewhere more suited to a their younger siblings isn’t a hill to die on, in my opinion. How does forcing them make them a better person?!

I would rather save up for two years than do a depressing caravan holiday. Let alone one in a tiny touring caravan.

And if it pours down

<shudder>

What do you expect her to do on a lovely quiet beach?

We used to go away every year in a tourer. The shower is a tiny box that takes up too much water so we always had to use the shower block on site. It’s certainly not enough room for a teenage girl not far from adulthood to have much privacy to change and get washed without it being awkward. You all seem to forget how mortifying it is to be a teen re privacy and you don’t want to be dashing around getting to cover up in front of your dad or younger siblings. Even big tourers are just so cramped

A week in a caravan in Mablethorpe sounds pretty dire to me, bugger all to do, especially if it rains - which it has always done when I've visited. Could you not at least upgrade to somewhere near Whitby, which has cool shops which teenagers like, and a lot more life?

@Charlotte350 do you go to a site with a lot of teens? If not that’s what she may be missing - company her own age.

One of the best holidays I had as a kid in the touring van with my younger siblings was when I was 14/ nearly 15 as there were loads of teens my age. Had such a good time.

as there was a bunch of us it was safe for us to just go off and do our own thing as a group of kids, we were well behaved and respectful to the other guests, hung out in the games room, round the farm, the lakes and the playground when all the little ones went to bed.

we all had a curfew of 10pm (or back to clubhouse to find parents for the last hour).

i may of even ended up in a little holiday romance with a boy my age. 😬🤣🙈