The stunning selfishness of teenagers - add your example.

[OwlBeGone]

Look, I know it's a stage (usually) and part of their brain evolution but fuck me, the selfishness and self absorption really flabbergasts me sometimes. My dh has had to rush off to help his mum who is having a crisis due to undiagnosed dementia, most likely, and not once have either of my teens asked about how things are going with her!? They're 15 and 18.

In general, they're OK kids in general, and I have been keeping them updated, but that's the only reason they know what's going on. I know there's an argument of "they don't have to ask because you're telling them" but it's only if I seek them out, sometimes later on in the day.

A few weeks ago I was sat in my living room and looked into the kitchen to see water running from the ceiling down the walls. My DD 17 was in the shower, I shouted up for her to turn the shower off, she didn't hear first time, so in a panic I screamed up to turn the shower off as water is coming through the kitchen ceiling. Her response 'but I've only been in ten minutes!'

I have to drive my dd and her friend to a hobby, but I'm not allowed to speak and have to drive past the place, whilst they hide in the back, so no one sees them - one day I will drop them off directly outside the place, I may even wear my ph's to do it

Classic one from youngest DD when she was 14 (I should add that she is now 20 and just a fabulous young woman). We had a disastrous BBQ incident which involved 2 fire engines, an ambulance and us needing to stay well away from the house incase there were pockets of gas or the gas canister blew up (don't ask). My husband was sitting in the driveway with an oxygen mask on, being tended by the paramedics for smoke inhalation and burns to his hands. Cue strop from DD2 that her phone was about to run out of battery and why couldn't she go back inside to charge it!

My theory is that teenagers being twats is an evolutionary strategy. If they stayed lovely all the time we'd want to keep them with us and wouldn't want them to move out. This way we're often quite happy for them to leave! So it's good for genetic diversity but god it's hard work at the time!

Finally if it's any help DD2 now shakes her head in disbelief at some of the things she did as a teen and has apologised profusely. She's now completely wonderful!

Smoked cigarettes in the conservatory where I have been drying the laundry due to it being toasty hot in there and not giving a fuck that I now had to re-wash everything because it now stinks of smoke.

Why is he welcome in your home if he's so rude?

It's emotional abuse and he is a grown man.

Reading this thread makes me grateful that my teen dd is almost coming out the other side of this now, she is 17 and helps around the house, talks to me nicely most of the time) and is grateful if I do something for her.

A couple of years ago this was not the case.

I was ill one weekend and only managed to do one laundry. Fast forward on Tuesday morning before school, my 14 yo daughter shouted, “you had 3 days to wash my PE top and its still dirty and you haven’t even ironed my uniform. What have you been doing?!” When I said she can do it herself, her answer was, “you are the parent and you decide to have a child so its your responsibility”. Horrible little thing. Now shes even worse. Making me question my parenting every single day and I only have one!