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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

Original poster

Teenager not working at Uni

168 replies

Busymum45 · 01/03/2020 18:14

I have a lovely lad who started uni in September, problem is we just found out he's not done any of the assignments and only attended 28% of lectures. Asked him and he said he struggled to get into the routine, kept missing things and now feels so.far behind he doesn't know what to do

We sat down together and he wrote an email to.his lecturer to ask for a meeting. Hopefully he will go and get something sorted.

I fear he can't cope with uni and really struggles to study independently.

Getting myself so stressed over it as pretty sure he will fail the year .

Is it something I should help him with or leave him to.it? They.may be adults at 18 but he is not mature enough yet?

Any advice welcome xxxx

OP posts:
OlivejuiceU2 · 01/03/2020 20:27

I personally don’t know any department at my University that would take someone with one A Level but there may be more to it than what OP has posted? May be BTEC too?

OlivejuiceU2 · 01/03/2020 20:30

Seriously haha. OK. I don’t think you know too much about higher education then

Thisismytimetoshine · 01/03/2020 20:31

On the contrary Grin

VivaLeBeaver · 01/03/2020 20:34

Well if people have unconditional offers of course they can get on degrees with one (or no) A levels.

AlexaShutUp · 01/03/2020 20:42

Well if people have unconditional offers of course they can get on degrees with one (or no) A levels.

Well, yes, quite. And of course, once they have those unconditional offers, they know they don't need to work, so they don't necessarily develop a good work ethic.

It's unethical, and sets students up to fail.

titchy · 01/03/2020 20:52

He gets funding for the four year course plus a spare year? And he reckons his lecturer told him this??

That's correct.

titchy · 01/03/2020 20:54

Yeah not sure you can claim much experience of HE thisis based on your posts ....

titchy · 01/03/2020 20:59

Advice for OP - he's pretty much paid for this year, there's no particular benefit in him dropping out now, and having a bit of family support behind him to do his absolute best is probably better than him mum telling him he doesn't stand a chance and to drop out now.

However, the reality is that he probably doesn't stand a chance of passing this year. So, plan B. Apprenticeship? Work in Burger King while he assesses his life? Travel? Voluntary work? Access course in a year or two? While he's at university he can access careers advice - might be useful.

GoatyGoatyMingeMinge · 01/03/2020 21:09

My understanding is that the foundation year (which this boy is on) is basically for those who have fucked up their A levels. It's an additional "probationary" year, which is pitched at a lower level than a degree, and is not really part of the degree at all.

To be honest, although it's a bit late now, it sounds like he'd have been better off doing a couple of years at work, which he might either have loved, or which might have given him the realisation that work without a decent education is a bit shit and enough of a kick up the arse to get motivated as a mature student.

SallyOMalley · 01/03/2020 21:20

As I understand it it, OPs son is on a foundation year - year 0, if you like. Progression onto year 1 will be dependent on satisfactory grades and (probably) satisfactory attendance too.

It is possible to gain entry into foundation years with just one or two A levels. Year 0 (as ucas describes it) is designed. to being students up to the same level as those coming in with 3 A levels or equiv.

OP, I'm sure I don't need to say this, but your son really needs to start engaging, or if it's not for him, consider taking time out. That's not always a bad thing I don't think: students can come back into the system much more prepared if they leave it a couple of years longer.

Tbh though, if attendance is as low as you say, I'm surprised that the uni hasn't pulled him up on it before now - we would in our gaff (unless I missed something in your OP ..)

LIZS · 01/03/2020 21:26

It depends what the subject is. In many creative subjects - drama, art for example - it is used standalone to broaden skills and identify specialisms for further study. In others such as sciences it may be to bring skills such as Maths up to standard if not studied or graded highly enough at A level/Btec l3. Increasingly it is offered to make up for weak level 3 education, to attract mature students back into education or as a taster. There is no definite commitment to progress onto the full degree course unless the offer was a degree with foundation year and the required standard was met.

LIZS · 01/03/2020 21:30

I suspect he has had warnings about lack of attendance or work submission and ignored them. If the course is only a few hours a week lecture attendance may not be compulsory but assignments would be If it is science /engineering there may be compulsory lab classes and practical assessments, which would be tricky to make up and attendance monitored.

lljkk · 01/03/2020 21:33

he needs a plan B what he's going to do with his life if he doesn't pass Foundation yr

RoryGillmoresEvilTwin · 01/03/2020 21:49

Christ op, is he being completely honest about what he has missed and if it's even possible to catch up at this point.
I did a science foundation year (I'm a mature student and hadn't studied for a while so it made sense for me). As others have pointed out, it's not actually degree level work but my foundation year was intense! 4 modules over the year but the reality is that there's only really 6/7 months of teaching. So imagine attempting to pass 3/4 A levels in that time frame. As I said it was intense.
I had assignments, coursework, course tests and exams. All of the coursework was spread throughout the academic year. It was only the final exams that were in May/June. Chances are he'll have missed too much to continue this year.
If he's not doing sciences he may be ok.

Copperas · 01/03/2020 22:00

Sounds like many posters on the thread about adhd in adults. Would that ring any bells with you? Might be worth getting it checked out

Original poster
Busymum45 · 01/03/2020 23:32

Thanks all, actually he didn't need any A levels as had the unconditional offer ages ago based on the personal statement, he says many on the foundation also had unconditional offers, seems odd.

Will see what happens but yes he has a plan b , the army eeeek

OP posts:
Ginfordinner · 02/03/2020 07:57

Could he be depressed? Has he approached anyone to ask for extra support? I agree that checking for ADHD or anything else is worth considering.

At DD's university such a low attendance rate would trigger a wellbeing check from the university. Has this not happened where your son is?

I feel that there is far too much pressure from schools to push unsuitable students into higher education. Unconditional offers don't help either. Going to university straight from school with one A level is not good preparation for further study.

It certainly sounds that at this point university isn't for him.

Original poster
Busymum45 · 02/03/2020 08:51

Interesting you say about ADHD as he thinks he has this himself. No one has contacted him or done anything. He's had the odd attendance email but that's it. They don't seem that bothered and he says he feels he has been forgotten.

OP posts:
Ginfordinner · 02/03/2020 08:57

Oh, poor boy. It sounds like he needs some support. It is a poor reflection on the university that this has been allowed to go on for so long. So many 18 year olds are supposed to be adults, but aren't emotionally mature enough to be away from home and behave like responsible adults.

On MN there is a school of thought that once a child reaches their 18th birthday they miraculously become mature adults. I don't subscribe to this BTW.

He needs to contact student support. Unfortunately you can't do this for him, so he needs to find the courage. I wish you both all the best.

notaflyingmonkey · 02/03/2020 09:01

OP my DS is in the same boat. Doing a foundation year with 2 A levels, but struggling. He has ASD and I think built up his expectations about what uni would be like, in particular that he would be able to makes friends, and it hasn't worked out at all. Part of the problem (I think) was that in his first term he only had courses 2 half days a week, so there was no structure for him. Living in halls proved hard, as he doesn't know how to make small talk, doesn't drink, etc.

He is going to drop out at the end of this year (if he makes it that far) and do something different.

Original poster
Busymum45 · 02/03/2020 09:41

Thanks, It also winds me up people think as soon as they turn 18 they are adults wvj think rationally and can cope. He hasn't made any friends really and has 8 hours a week lectures, not much structure for him either. It isn't working out? Doesn't help that my mum tells everyone he is at uni and going to make all of us proud. Errrr..... Just want him to have some support!!

OP posts:
notaflyingmonkey · 02/03/2020 09:44

I contacted student support and asked them to reach out to him, but unfortunately the onus is on the student to contact them. Something that my DS just won't/can't do.

The only thing that I can do is encourage him to develop his plan B.

Original poster
Busymum45 · 02/03/2020 09:46

Yep mine wouldn't reach out himself, I emailed them today actually but I'm.sure they won't let me get involved.
Hope things work out for both our boys X

OP posts:
PaddyF0dder · 02/03/2020 09:54

It’s interesting how people jump to ADHD as opposed to just being lazy. Laziness is surely more common, particularly in a course that offers unconditional places to people with poor grades. That doesn’t exactly reward hard work or engagement.

Thisismytimetoshine · 02/03/2020 09:55

Why would your son self diagnose with ADHD?