17 year old DD phone restrictions

[marionemread]

For the past few years I've taken all electronic devices off my 17 year old daughter at 9:30pm and her WiFi goes off completely at 9:30pm. This is the same for weekends and during the holidays. This results in constant arguments and her attitude has worsened including her swearing and arguing with me and being very reluctant to give her phone over. Am I being too strict?

Well it's almost 1am. Why are you on a device?

Ok a 17 year old not allowed to stay up after 9.30? This is not for real

Taylor

Groundes Saturday because she got so drunk at a party and the end of November she was out of it and DH had to pick her up early. Grounded until her 18th bday in April.

I think I’m following this thread so closely because I am gobsmacked.

Your poor daughter must be feeling so trapped, not being able to leave her room after 9.30? Crazy. Of course she’s upset that you’re taking her phone off of her, that she isn’t allowed to watch her programmes etc, I’m surprised she hasn’t rebelled even more!

I am not sure about all this, I think you need to go to bed yourself OP you shouldn't be on MN this late. You need your sleep surely. You need to set an example by not being online in your bedroom all night.

But I'm an adult of +40 and she is still a teenager, hence why I can stay up later

But as Gnome says, you are free to use it at 12.40am having gone to bed at 9.30pm and making everyone else go with you, turning the wifi off and taking away phones then turning the wifi back on so you can use it. Are you going through her phone?

I think this is a wind up, if its not i hope your DD has fun at Uni.

I would love and pay a lot to watch a goggle box like show of your daughter as a Fresher.

Oh ok, so when she's 18 all bans will be dropped. Roll on April then.

So the WiFi is back on now?

DH blocks the WiFi on the DCs devices so they don't get it past 9:30pm.

YOU ARE WRONG

I had to shout as you are not listening. Your job as a parent is to teach your child how to be an adult, not to keep her as a child.

An analogy: water is dangerous, your child might drown. Did you teach her to swim / have someone teach her to swim? Or have you kept her in the baby pool with armbands on so she never learned how to swim and so how to keep herself in the water?

So what's your DH up to now? Sounds all very complex.

I don't go through any of my DCs phones

Ahh bless her. So both her parents are arse holes :(

She's going to be posting on stately homes 178992 in a few years.

What lifeskills do you feel you are teaching your daughter by doing this?

OP do you genuinely not see anything wrong or damaging in this situation?

Ensuring she gets a good night's sleep for the next day.

That is not a life skill

But you said she's awake anyway.
So you're pretty much failing in every way possible anyway.

If there’s no WiFi then why does her devices need confiscating?
She could still listen to music. Read any ebooks etc. Watch any of her shows that she’s downloaded.

You both are being mean for the sake of it because you don’t want to treat her as an individual. By treating her as a child you are telling her you have no respect for her.

If this is real, you are losing your daughter when she goes to university.

OP you wanted other mums opinions and have clearly got them. Start treating your daughter like an adult (which she will be in a few months)

Is your dd jennifer pan?

Hopefully she will make shit loads of noise at 6am, thus stopping you from getting 8 hours sleep.afterall if you had gone to sleep already this wouldn’t bother you