Male babysitter for 14yr old DD & 4yr old DD.

[Lifeisshort123]

My DH and my 3 boys are going to see a play tonight in London. We usually wouldn't have a problem with leaving our sensible 14yr old in charge and she has looked after her younger siblings and special needs older brother before without any issues. However, as we won't be back until about 12am as the play is at 8, I have booked a babysitter who we know vaguely. He is a 17yr old male who's mum is friends with one of my close friends. My DH thinks this is a bad idea and they should only be looked after by a female and someone over 18. Is he being unreasonable?

That's awful.

Really?

Because 17 yo boys go out with 14 yo girls. They are peers.

17 yo girls do not go out with 14 yo boys. They are not peers.

I don't think people are anti teenage boys per say. Most families have them ..

But your creating a situation where the chances of something happening are significantly higher than in another circumstance.

You do not know this boy - regardless if a friend of a friend says he is nice it he apparently has good GCSE or if he is cheap.

You are creating an enviroment for things to possibly go wrong off the back of words off other people.

No mother would ever expect their son to do anything like this - why would they and usually it takes years for things to come out.

Tbh if you hadn't had a posting history I would of thought you were taking this piss as your very flippant about the whole thing.

I have a teenage boy and I wouldnt let a teenage boy look after a teenage girl. Of course theres a good chance that nothing would happen, but theres also a good chance that theyll be shagging on your sofa, or else completely awkward with each other.

No I wouldnt ask a 17 year old girl to babysit a 14 year old either, but mostly because there is barely any age difference and there would be no authority and it would be a bit humiliating.

I would just pay the 14 year old to look after their sister

I have a 17 year old son. Babysitting isn't his thing, but there is no way he would consider a just turned 14 year old as being a peer. Given that the OP said her babysitter was almost 18 that's almost a four year age gap. He's presumably in sixth form if he has his GCSEs, the dd is maybe in the second year? Sure some girls date much older boys but this one has brothers this guys age and so probably has plenty of exposure to older boys and so isn't so likely to get crushes on them.

Not all teenage boys are sex mad, in fact looking at ds and his peers none of them are in relationships. Sad as a parent of a teenager to hear so much negativity towards boys. I have a close in age dd as well and it is frustrating when people treat them so differently purely on account of their sexes. Plus as dd is bisexual and sexually active she might actually be more likely to be in a sexually interesting zone than him.

Us mums know who's opinions we can trust. We have to rely on our 'network' from time to time so we can enjoy life AND care for those we love. How would we get by without the help of others occasionally?

Lifeishort123, you sound like a great mum who thinks carefully about doing the best for your whole family and that includes getting out with DH and older children for special times.

I think just as adult characters and behaviours vary, so do teens! I know so many teens now I have teenage children and I feel so sorry for the bad press teens sometimes get! They are just young adults and we shouldn't assume they can't be trusted when our good friends know better. ..☺

I'm glad you had a good night out and enjoy more in the future, safe in the knowledge everyone is being looked after!