We shop therefore we are.. Wise & Avid

[blossoming]

Thanks to ltec for the new title.

Evening all

Just popping in quickly while dp baths dd.

I am so fed up of the house being in such a state. We also seem to be supremely unorganised in terms of what we want the end house to look like. The man came to measure for the worktops today and we hadn't even discussed it so ended up deciding on a colour in five minutes. Not the end of the world but not our usual planned selves.

I am a lot happier with dp atm having decided pre holiday to be happy whenever possible. It sounds stupid but everything had become a competition - who was more tired, who worked harder etc. It is much nicer like this.

Random thoughts there from me.

Fritzi that is really sad and such a shame for you and your LO. I used to be the other way round with my beautiful ex dh. I worked all the time and he went on several holidays without me. I wince at the memory of him ringing from the train to the airport to ask where I was and me telling him to go alone to Rome for our anniversary weekend and that I'd join him there. I did join him but I remember seeing the champagne he'd bought for us to drink on the journey and realising what I was doing to our life. The pressure of work can be so hard and added to that the pressure of being the sole earner (as was the case for me and exdh then as he was at law school). When I was pg with dd I was working 10 hour days all the time, desperate not to let clients down. It took dp turning up at my office and crying for me to realise that nothing in life mattered that much. It was hard going on maternity leave and walking away from the office and even harder when everything went on without me. I felt cheated like I'd given so much of my life to my job and it didn't matter at all. I found the only way to get through the guilt (and sadness) at not being around for holidays, family events etc was to work more. It is hard for everyone involved. More ramblings. Sorry everyone.

Two quick clothes questions - what vests do you all wear? I need a few white and black vests. I also want a few tshirts but not ones that cling on the belly but are still quite fitted. Any suggestions?

evening lovely ladies

am so sorry that there are so many of us here with image issues. I've been making a concerted effort to love the way I look now, based on the fact that I didn't love my looks when I was younger and now look back at photos and think "you fool ... you pretty, young fool... I wish I looked like you" When I am 50, I will no doubt look at how I looked aged 37 and think it's lovely. So why not think it's lovely now?

I don't really think my parents had much to do with my issues .. more society, really. Was a mixed-race kid at a time when Aussie society wasn't really very accepting... was very confusing to be told by adults how beautiful/ tall/ lovely I was and then go to school and be called a fat ugly wog/ Abo/ Paki/ people like me should be illegal in this country etc. Honestly lost the ability to know whether I was hideous or not!! Being thin, however, was something that anyone could do, regardless of race or skin colour.

Attitudes changed a lot by the time I hit my teens - everyone wanted the skin that tanned easily, the 'exotic' looks etc .. it all moved a bit beyond the Weetbix kid look .. but by then by obsession with weight was deeply entrenched!!

Don't mean to paint a bad picture of Australia, I'm harking back to the 70s and it's not like that now, at least not in the Big Smoke

"tis a fine line though as one doesn't want to become big headed, of course, as that is a very unattractive trait that no amount of lustrous hair/ olive skin/ full lips can make up for!!

thanks for the MW code mumsnut .. now, what's everyone going to buy?

Hi Libra nice to have you back and v.glad you are feeling better

vin you make me laugh out loud. Sorry about your dp and his job though. Hope it all gets sorted soon.

well done on the car Apuski!!

carciofi definitely keep the jeans!! did you end up keeping that lovely dress?

mm sorry about your house, I hate that kind of upheaval. I love the decision to be happy whenever possible though, sounds good to me.

Hope everyone enjoyed the sunshine. I was at the sandpit in denim mini, coral tee & straw trilby - no knicker elastic incidents, TG.

Not sure whether it's common knowledge but we have a birthday girl in our midst - happy birthday fleecy!! Glad the sun shone for you and hope you've had a gorgeous day with your LOs.

final question - does anyone have the Toast Alexas? I think I prefer them to the R&Bs, esp now I have read that the R&Bs come up narrow ...

Sounds like you've been through a lot monkeysmama. I'm also looking for vests with ruching at the bust. While you were away I linked to the boden summer jersey top which carciofi and I have in bright pink. I'm really pleased with it.

MM - Thanks for sharing and being so honest. It really helps to see things from the other side too and I don't doubt that DH finds the situation sometimes as difficult as I do.

I get my vests often from Petit Bateau. Depending on your size "16/18/20years" can be worn by grown-ups too. You can wash and put them in the dryer on low heat (although it says on the label you shouldn't) and they won't lose their shape. Don't know if there is a shop where you live. It's very popular here.

Good luck with your house!

OMG, how did I miss that? hells that's awesome, am so pleased!!!! x 1000.

Meant to ask - is Hana on holiday or have I missed a name change again?

Sorry have had no time to catch up yet but re glads -

LTEC I sent for the Toast Alexas in gold. They are really lovely in RL, very soft leather, I'd say a brighter gold than they appear on the web site. The only reason I returned them was that the leather almost felt too soft and thin and worried the straps would break...

...but I haven't found anything I like more and am now tempted to order in the tan. Reckon they're pretty true to size, possibly come up a little on the small side. Hope this helps. From memory I think Apuski has the gold ones.

I'd also like to try the R&B ones to compare as they get such high praise from several A&Wer's but not easy to get to a shop from where I live

Think there is a 10% Toast code kicking around somewhere, will try to find and post.

A&Wers ....am horrified at self as am also v pedantic about correct use of apostrophes

LTEC - Just reading about your experiences when you were younger makes me feel angry and sad. I can't even begin to imagine what it must have been like to grow up in such a difficult situation. Please be proud of who you are and what you look like! I often can't accomplish this myself but I try hard to set a good example for DD. I can definitely relate to what you say about old photographs...

You are such an inspiration on this thread!

Had a look at that top Blossoming - I like it but have a lot of boob. How low is it? Thank you!

Those of you who are small of foot, I got a lovely pair of pale gold glads in Zara's girls dept today for only 25 Euro, wore them this afternoon and they are really comfortable. They go up to 38 and come in silver also.

MM your dd made me laugh out loud, what a character

Fritzi how awful about your holiday, I would be so disappointed and angry if I was in your position. Dh is not a long-hours high-achieving sort, more the laid back, creative, not tremendously well paid sort, but the upside is that he is around a lot. He leaves the house after us in the morning, often nips home for lunch and meets us in the park before 6 most evenings. It is great for family life even though a times we both wish he was more of a high-flier salary wise!

Roman you are something of a Renaissance woman aren't you? Pretty impressed that you make your own curtains along with all your other skills!

Carciofi great about the schools, they do things differently on the northside BIL went to SP, after repeatedly running away from another boarding school, he was much happier at SP.

Zembo I love chanel lipgloss, Les Scintillantes, sparkly and very pretty colours.

Blossoming I was telling my mum about the dress you made, she was very impressed, says jersey is not a beginners fabric! She has been sewing since her teens, today I am wearing a dress she made me, DKNY pattern in Liberty print. She has been making me dresses since I was tiny, during my teens I was the envy of all my friends as she would copy clothes from magazines, I had an amazing wardrobe. I remember once trying on a John Galliano dress in Brown Thomas, mum in the changing room with me turning it inside out to see how it was made, then going home and making me a perfect copy

LTEC that you encountered attitudes like that growing up, bet those same girls are of you now.

Forgot to add: I prefer the Toast Alexas. The colour looks a bit more subtle than the R&B glads.

Good night all!

LTEC, that is sad. One of my friends (another Sydney girl) had a similar experience. I kept the dress and it has been much admired.

Happy birthday Fleecy! MM, I get vests from Gap, Boden and J Crew are also good, if NAP stock them here.

Thanks for vest suggestions.

That has made me feel really sad Cakey.

Verity, your mother sounds like a gem!

Yep, DNS is good for schools.

Hmm, wonder if I know your bil. I finished there in 1989.

LTEC yes I have the Toast Alexas (now forever known as my 'falling down the stairs' sandals) - I have worn them a few times now, and I have to say I think they're pretty narrow. I've got fairly slim width size 6 feet and they're just about fine on me, but a bit too tight when my feet swelled a bit in the heat.

MM I have tended in the past to buy vests from Gap, but I love my Splendid vests now (got from Figleaves which always has a discount somewhere).

MM, the Boden vest is fairly low but not indecently so. I saw a code for 20% off earlier so worth a try. I got them in pink, white and blue. Shame they don't do it in black.

He's the youngest in dh's family, he was still in school when ds1 was born, so 12 years ago. I finished school in 1989 though, but on the southside Went to TCD then.

Verity ... I also went to TCD (did French and Italian), you?

MM - I agree with Cake - the decision to try and be as happy as possible in the present sounds good.
Aaagh to house renovations - I am in the process of getting quotes for a whole bunch of stuff but I never seem to actually make any progress/push the button on stuff. Eternal procrastinator - at least yours is happening

Vests - recently bought a few vests from Benetton - £12 each, thin cotton, just the right length, racer back. I got white, purple and coral but they had lots of others.
The white is a touch transparent so I have also ordered this to layer underneath.

Fritzi - sorry about your dh working and missing your hols but hope you have a fab time with your dd.

I won't be availing myself of the MW code I don't think as have just had a little splurge on ASOS

After the disappointment of the DP shrinking tiedye maxi I have ordered this and I do love a stripe.
Also got a bit carried away and am going to try this jacket. While I was away at w/e 2 of the other girls had lovely leather jackets which made me . Who was it that said they had sighted the GAP leather shirt at Finsbury Circus? Am not going to get up there any time soon so figure this may be as close as I'm going to get.

Oh, and one of the girls was wearing this jumpsuit and I have to say it looked really good.

Also ordered a couple of bikini's - animal print natch and weirdy one shoulder. I have never tried this brand of swimwear before so I will report back if it's any cop.
I love ASOS, spent enough for free next day delivery and the returns are easy

My bro is 31 and also went to SPS, so was probably in your bil's class.

You must all think I am mad! I actually wrote "vow the cows" earlier which doesn't make any sense at all .

What I meant was something like: make the cows (on the farm) make go "wow" at my amazing holiday outfits. That doesn't sound much better At least you now know that no cows will be harmed on that farm.

Cake - your school experience sounds miserable and I am actually a bit shocked that attitudes were still like that so recently in time - you are same age as me, we are young

I think Everything hasn't been in since her hols - think she must be back by now no?

Esher, good shopping! I have been thinking it over and since we aren't going to stay in the UK long term, I don't want to make another move here so don't worry about the schools question. Thanks for offering though.

Carciofi I did economics and philosophy. Buttery or Pav?

BILs best friend was grandson of v famous hollywood star. Same year?