We're Avid & Wise, We're discussing our Buys, we're not so keen on Flys, We prefer Peep-toe Sky-Highs!!

[LetThemEatCake]

sorry couldn't help myself

Thank you and had completely forgotten Top Shop (or maybe blanked it from my mind ). DH not linking the changing bag idea, and thinks we should get a hamper for new mum friend

So Roman,do you think you would go for dc4? Seems everyone is doing 4 nowadays....

Quite tempted to try for a 4th here.

buggy buy her 10 hrs babysitting, unless she's sorted on that front! Someone gave me a Clarins box of essential products for new mums - that was nice.

Dolce I love babies, but having a 8, 5 and 4 yo is so easy and nice. They play together, just get on with things, don't need watching. Why spoil it? Not to mention that it's so hard already being 5 not 4, when it comes to booking holidays and all that stuff. It's also hard to split myself 3 ways, let alone 4. And most of all, there were a couple of years when we were too knackered to be happy and I don't want that again. So I'm not saying no, because I hate the finality of that, but at the same time, it doesn't seem like a very good idea.

everything if you tell him that, that should get him shopping pretty fast

Seriously, that's terrible - does he travel a lot?

Used to live near High St Ken, and feel I need a more "full-on" shopping extravaganza at the weekend as don't get to shop without the boys very often! Could start in Knightsbridge, though, then bus it OS later if I need a department store (am a bit scared of Harvey Nics...)

Everything - don't be ... I'm sure he's missed you lots, and may have some nice surprises for you . My DH is the kind to pretend he hasn't bothered to do something, and then proffer some amazing gift with a flourish! I fall for it everytime!!! On the matter that you have not missed him - It's tough when you are left holding the baby, and we women cope amazingly - you've had your hands full and he hasn't been around, but you'll soon get into it again...

Roman - yes, understand completely...babies are wonderful - my youngest 7 mo, and a dream but the first few months absolutely exhausting and you have to work v v hard to keep it all together....there's that and the tiredness competition thing between husbands and wives|!!! Know what you mean too about not making the decision final!

Happy Bday Buggy! Do you think you will then? How old are yours?

everything

Wise words D&B

Not sure about no 4 - mine are now 2, 4 & 6. I'll be 39 tomorrow. Would definitely go for it if could be confident that my body would cope, but fear it may fall apart if I asked it to carry another child

everything - def call your husband out on the 'no normal shops' thing. I've been there and there are a variety of malls!

My DH works away a fair amount, including overseas, although less so at the mo. It can be difficult. You have my sympathies.

Oh everything - keep your chin up...Right Missus...you need some foxy clothes to shake you - and HIM up!!!!! Get thee online (as our leader would say)....c'mon....I know its shallow - but you will feel so much better!!!

Yes Buggy, weirdly I kind of worry that my body would not cope with a 4th. I felt so ungainly (although I only put on about 2 stone), come the end of the pregnancy, and soooo tired the whole time...but obviously women do cope, so its probably irrational...but I do feel quite contented with my 3, and 40 was my watershed which I have now reached. DH would be delighted...but I feel life is returning to normal, whatever that was...!

I think most women on this thread's DHs work away a bit - hence the avid shopping!

Everything my marriage is top of the class, but I'm not particularly missing my dh. I feel sorry for him stressing out about his flight and I'm looking forward to him being home but I've got lots to do all day with my boys, so whether he's back tomorrow or Sunday is no biggie really. I wouldn't worry about that. Also, when you live with someone all the time, having a bit more time to yourself is nice, isn't it? I like lying in bed on my own watching "Mad Men" on my laptop! I like knowing that there won't be a grouchy bloke in my bedroom in the morning complaining he can't find any clean socks! (or only 3 small grouchy blokes, not 4 )

I feel a bit like that about babies too buggy. For the most part I've been one of those lucky, spring-back-into-shape types, and haven't had any cs or complications of any severity, but since no3 my tummy has a crepey feel, and I have an umbilical hernia, that's not a problem but could become one. I can still feel pains in my pelvis and hips sometimes that are pregnancy relics. Feels like another go would be pushing my luck.

Best not tell him that tho Roman!!!

I've got 4 DCs,but with large gaps,ages range from 20 to 4!

I always wanted four,and started young

Dolcee unfortunately I cannot blame my husband working away for my shopping,he is home every night

Roma and Dolce - frankly I was SHOCKED at the state of my body post DD, the hideous sleep deprivation and stress, as well as having no time for yourself, feeling as unsexy as possible and pretty pissed off at DH for getting to escape to work each day. 10 months' later, much of that has settled down, and DH and I are back on track having a nice time together again. However, I think we will stop at 2 DCs because I don't want to be out of the workforce for too long and I expect I would struggle to look after 3 or more children. Plus, it would be v expensive living in central London w 3 or more.

Everything - that it sounds like you don't feel esp cherished by your DH. Its no doubt a good thing that you are going to Relate. Perhaps if you work at it slowly, you are making lasting changes (ie not quick fix). Should add that DH is wonderful (one of us has to be! ), so am v happy, but I empathise with how hard it must be if you don't feel that way.

My body was back to normal very soon after dc1 & 2 too. I was 35 having dc2. Dc3 was born a week after I turned 39. I look about 3 months pregnant still and have crepey stomach. I think I'm done.

I've had 3 c-sections and each one has been a little harder to recover from.

Also - I hardly have enough energy for 3 let alone 4. Am also looking forward to getting my life back a bit.

So definitely no more dc's for us. Although did see the most adorable newborn this morning but managed not to feel at all broody.

Helped by the fact bea slept through the night for the first time last night.

Have tried dress on again and am going to get it taken up as do think it looks rather nice. Think its just taking me a while to get used to dresses rather than my uniform of jeans.

Dh has managed to talk his way into Lufthansa business class, so home tomorrow. He's amazing, he can get anyone to do anything . Can't wait to see my goodies!

Everything - sorry to hear you are having a rough time at the moment. I hope that things pick up for you both soon.

I have 2 DS's who are 4yo and 2yo. I'd love a 3rd, always imagined having a big family, but DH says definitely NO. Am a bit down about it tbh, I really thought he'd change his mind but have had a big chat recently and he is even more adament now, so think thats it for us

Everything - - must be mega stressful to be left on your own unexpectedly and hard to stop those negative thoughts. I really hope relate can help - it's good that you're both willing to work at it.

I'm really interested in people who big families (I class over 3 as big ). I only have 1 sister and there's no big families in our immediate relations so I find it hard to get my head round. I definitely want another one but found the first few months with DD so so so hard that I am a bit scared and don't think it will be for a couple of years yet.

Went back to work today - bit of a fashion wasteland so was glad I didn't try anything too brave - stuck to black straight leg trousers with cream top & navy cardigan. Think it looked ok.
Managed to go nearly the whole day without getting upset thinking about DD at nursery but had a bit of a cry at 3pm when someone said something a bit insensitive She was happy as anything when I picked her up though and had had a good day so that has set my mind at ease for tomorrow.

Where is cakey?? I could do with her cake expertise

MrsJ - so glad your DD enjoyed nursery! Delie adores company and activity and sounds like your sweetie does, too. Hope you find it easier to be at work tomorrow.

Buggied - how about Westfield? All under one roof... Kings Rd Zara is the best one though, so perhaps that's an option?

Roma - well done your DH!!