Why doesn’t she want me as a client?

[notamumyet2010]

This is such a first world problem, I’m almost embarrassed to speak about it but it’s really playing on my mind so I would love some opinions.
For years, I’ve been seeing a beautician for nail art. She was amazing, really talented and I thought we got on really well. I knew she also worked from home and after a couple of years I asked if she was looking for some home clients and she said no not at the moment due to time/space. Fair enough. I thought.
Anyway start of this year, she lost her job, it was very sudden as the place went under. She messaged me telling me what happened and I expressed empathy. After a week or so I saw on social media she was telling people to message her if they want to book in with her at home. Straight away I sent her a message and she responded saying she was just waiting for some materials to arrive and she would message me to let me know once she was up and running. I saw again on her socials she was seeing clients. I waited for a message and nothing. I was super confused as I really thought we got on well and I was a regular client. I left it for a while thinking she was probably getting things sorted, and it takes a while I’m sure. Well it’s been months now and I thought hell I’m going to send her one more message. So I texted asking how she is and is she taking more clients on. She said yes and she’s working hard including at a local spa. No mention of me booking in with her. I was like ok this is odd, decided to be brave and ask outright. “Can I book with you?, only I never heard from you” I get a strange message back saying she would be willing to do my nails but is fully booked till September!
I feel like for some reason she certainly doesn’t want me as a client, I have racked my brains for a reason and the only one I can think of is I ask for nail art every time which takes more time. However she did always say she loves it as she gets to be creative and all her other clients are boring. In fact she called me her favourite client.
Obviously sadly you guys will be no wiser as to why this has happened or what I’ve done, but my question is…..would you book in for September or just accept that for whatever reason this client/beautician relationship has ended?
It’s such a shame as she really is sooo talented but I just feel this has probably tainted the relationship now anyway.
Thanks for reading if you got this far!

It's an old thing left over from when beauty services didn't charge much , now it all costs a fortune.

ETA book for September and see how it goes

Stop over thinking it. Book an appointment for September and tell her you realise she will have to charge for the nail art. Job done. No stress.

Tips?? I have been getting my nails done for well over 30 yrs and have never tipped and don’t know any of my friends that tip after getting their nails done.
I think the salons charge enough without having to add on a tip.

OP, I would just move on and find another good nail artist rather than worry myself silly as to why your previous nail artist doesn’t want to do your nails.

She sounds hard work. Shes knocking back a regular reliable customer ?

Does she have school age children? If so, it's probably just that. Right now is sports days/assemblies/summer fair events and then she may be taking the school holidays off (or can't do longer appointments when they are around) that would make it September before she is available.

Obviously none of us can say for sure the reason she may not want you as a client. The first thing I thought of is it is the extra time it takes to do your nails. If you take a while deciding and then want nail art that takes longer than could be the issue. Maybe she was happy to give it you at no extra cost when it wasn't her business, but it's different now it is (and now she doesn't know how to tell you it will cost more). For example, I have a the same window cleaner as my Mum. He was putting up prices, my Mum's went up more than ours. She was a little surprised. I think it's because he comes to ours and we leave him to it and he puts a card through the door when he's done. My Mum however knows all the ins and outs about his life (all about his young family). She is clearly spending quite a long time talking to him. That means he is either able to take on less clients or it's eating into his time with his family. I think he's chosen to charge her for that time.

The other thought I've had is that you mention she has possibly over shared about her personal life. Maybe she now regrets it and feels uncomfortable having you in her home around people she may have told you personal stuff about.

I wonder as well though whether she is allowed to approach old clients? I know hairdressers aren't meant to tell their clients when they are moving salons or they might be seen as poaching them.

Talking of that though, I had a hairdresser that I followed between salons. Like you, I thought we had a relationship, a good giggle, occassional texts etc. Then she really messed up my hair. I was polite about letting her know I wasn't happy and I did want to keep her as my hairdresser. However it became very clear that she didn't even value me as a client let alone anything else.

So I do get that feeling of embarrassment and disappointment.

I never tip or give Christmas presents but I do try to make sure I'm paying fairly for their time.

By the sounds of it OP hasn't been doing that either. The OP knew she wasn't being charged enough (the beautician was lying to her boss about how much she was charging) so in those circumstances, the OP really should have been tipping to make up at least some of the difference.

Let it go. Part of your mistake is that you were doing it all by text. If you were telephoning, you could at least ask her, point blank, what the problem was.

If it's any consolation, I've twice been "fired" by hair salons because I had the audacity to politely point out that I'd left a half-dozen messages without anyone having the courtesy to return my calls.

Given that you expect extra service you should probably give a tip with each service and an extra christmas gift. You assumed she would work with less reimbursement on the assumption she would get a christmas gift? Sounds risky to me. And Lady-of-the-manor-ish, and a bit condescending.

Is this thread still going? Jesus find a new nail tech

Dg??

How did you jump to that? Have you been propositioned too?

My hair is in such a state right now that I can't be certain I couldn't be bribed by the promise of a decent barnet.

I think it's possible that the friendliness is what's making it awkward for her to book you now.

She was vocal about the price and how that was enough when she was an employee but now she's self employed she realises it's maybe not commercially viable especially if you come frequently.

She wouldn't know how you'd react to a significant price rise.

Maybe she just doesn't know how to deal with it so has become avoidant instead.

What rubbish. I hate the whole tipping culture. It is the responsibility of the nail technician to charge what is appropriate bearing in mind the work involved and the time taken. It’s not up to the client to make up the shortfall by guessing how much extra to pay.

That’s a bit pathetic of the nail technician then. There is no need for awkwardness, it’s a business arrangement.

’Dear Client, now I am working for myself my pricing structure has changed and will now be charging £X for nail art. I hope this is ok with you and I look forward to booking you in. Kind regards.’

I’m a house cleaner , work for myself and with no employees (context.)
I probably do the same as your nail tech, I do have favourite clients and clients that I really gel with but honestly, if I had to keep messaging everyone I’ve ever worked for and letting them know I’m up and running, would you like me to work for you etc etc, I’d be messaging all day instead of cleaning.
I wait for people to contact me and if I’m not taking new clients I’ll let them know but I rely on them reaching out to me. It’s not personal and it sounds very similar to what I would do with customers.

That really was your opening to insist
She clearly isn't very direct but nobody wants to be working for free.

This thread is so weird. She's offered you an appointment. Book it. Ask her to let you know if she has a cancellation sooner. Ask her new prices and make it clear you're happy to pay them.

It reads like you had different views on the client/ technician relationship. She was probably like that with everyone whereas you felt the two of you had bonded over your nails.
id say her indifference is unlikely to be personal it’s more likely she’s had plenty of business and not needed to pursue clients hence her perceived lack of interest.
its possible when she’s working for herself she’s less keen on intricate nail art as it eats into her time which may explain why she hasn’t made contact but it doesn’t mean she would refuse you as a client.

"For years, I’ve been seeing a beautician for nail art. She was amazing, really talented."

It seems that you are not the only person that appreciates her work! Waiting 8 weeks to get an appointment booked isn't so bad. I think that she has been very honest with you and because she is good, she gets booked quickly.

She sounds busy trying to make a living and has had a lot to deal with over the last 7 months. Maybe if you got an appointment you could have a proper chat and find out how she is doing?

Why not message back (within working hours) and ask for her prices so that you can choose what you would like to have done?

Then respect her professional boundaries, just as you would in a Salon. She is aware that you like her work and that you both get on, but she is trying to make a living and the security and framework of working in a Salon has gone. She will have to be super careful about who she accepts as a client. As it is her own home, she won't want people turning up 'on spec', expecting out of hours appointments or making unrealistic demands especially if she is balancing two jobs, (and a home life?)

Maybe she was hoping to start working at a different salon rather than working from home? Who knows!