Yes, we were asked to give our opinions, but my post was an attempt to dig deeper into those opinions and figure out why anyone would think it matters provided the bride doesn't care (which many don't). And several pps have carefully 'explained' to me, like I'm thick or something, that it's the 'norm', the 'tradition', 'the unwritten rule', the 'done thing', but have neatly dodged the question of why it should matter if the bride doesn't care. Which suggests to me that what people are really worrying about is the opinion of other guests (especially as some seem to be living in fear of being thought 'batshit' or a 'twat' over a colour choice😂).
I made it clear I was assuming a scenario where the bride doesn't care, so I don't see the relevance of referencing brides who do specify no white. They are absolutely entitled to their preference, but personally I think it's nuts to assume this is what all brides want if they haven't actually said so. Parts of this thread feel like we are being ordered to assume the bride will care and to obey this arbitrary rule which the bride might not even give two hoots about, and I just think that's laughably rigid and over-conventional. I last attended a wedding three weeks ago (so according to a pp I'm allowed to post on this thread, phew! 🙄) where the couple had instructed guests to wear whatever we felt comfortable in, and people did, including white. Which, as it turned out, would have been a non-issue anyway as the bride was in green. Imagine that!
What's really astonishing me about this thread is the sheer horror some pps are displaying at the mere thought that anyone might subscribe to a different view than their own, and the presentation of opinions as hard facts. As far as I'm concerned the only opinion that matters is that of the bride (and, obviously, the groom/other bride if they have an opinion on the matter). But sadly some people on this thread literally don't seem capable of getting past 'it's the norm', 'it's the rule', 'it's the tradition' etc. And I do mean sadly because I can't imagine living life slavishly obeying so-called norms for fear of what others might think, without actually examining or interrogating said norms to decide whether they objectively matter.