My clothes are aging me - please help?

[Nifty50something]

The other day someone mistook me for being over 60 when I'm actually in my early 50s. I asked a good friend about it and she said it's because my clothes are aging me. I've never followed fashion and tend to just wear what's comfortable, shop second hand or from m&s, etc. But I'd like to try to update my look.

I've been wearing:

1. Cropped jeans with zips to make them tapered
2. Black cigarette trousers tapered at the ankle
3. Midi dresses with nice patterns (not flower patterns but more aztec or palm print).

Are any of the above items still ok or are they all frumpy? Any links to things you've bought and love? What are the trends now (I think barrel leg trousers, denim jackets or cropped trench jackets, pink...also waistcoats without a top underneath which I wouldnt wear but could wear one over a top if that would work)?

Nothing wrong with looking 60 but I'm just not there yet and would prefer to look my age!

Lemonbalm13
John Lewis do a complimentary stylist session with no obligation to buy.

Finding your “colours” and body type and dressing to “flatter” your figure isn’t the same thing as finding your style. Copying an influencers outfit isn’t finding your style. Growing your hair long and wearing flowery dresses isn’t finding your style unless your style is flowery dresses. Just saying

Style is about wearing well fitted clothes in quality materials. UK women’s clothes are cut for pear shaped women because that is the predominant shape. I find French clothes fit my shape far better as a more hourglass/athletic shape. I have to buy at least a size or two bigger in jackets and shirts because I have very broad shoulders. I really struggle with dresses because when they fit on top they look like a sack around the bottom.
I’m currently, slowly loosing the weight I gained due to cancer treatment. I’m about half way there and not in a hurry. So have been buying really good quality items off Vinted for an interim wardrobe.

Unfortunately I lost my sister last year who had a huge collection of t shirts and dresses so I chose a few when we were sorting through her stuff. When I say huge I mean she had enough t shirts to never need to wash them more than once a year. In fact many she had never worn or maybe only worn once or twice. The same for handbags. She had two lovely Barber jackets ( summer and winter) that are almost new condition.

We had similar taste in colour and style so I probably won’t have to restock for some time. We didn’t live close to each other so I don’t have to be too careful about wearing things that people may recognise. She was a true eco warrior so would approve of our recycling. Although 75% of her wardrobe has gone to the hospice charity who looked after her.

I lost my confidence with clothes after becoming a mum and since I wear a uniform for work I slipped into the jeans and t shirt brigade. Now DS is grown up I’m starting to find my style again. I am going to spend tomorrow clearing out my wardrobe. I had a go earlier in the year but the OP has fuelled me to be a bit more ruthless.

Popping onto this thread to say @Nifty50something I've loved watching you finding your style - you're nailing it now. Brilliant. The dress is the absolute bomb. Love it!

One tip for inexpensive jewellery if you're passing a charity shop Pop in. I've bought dressing up jewellery for grand daughters and a few bits for myself.

I also like hats in cold weather covers up flat hair as well. I have lovely straw hat but only wear sunbathing or on holiday. Joan Collins has quite a collection but she's so put together.

If you want to look younger look more feminine. Aesthetic medicine isn’t rocket science. Feminine features are younger looking. On both women and men!

Oh do stop banging the same drum! Many of us disagree with you, and you constantly repeating the same nonsense is irritating.😧

I’m so sorry for your loss and I’m sure your sister would be absolutely delighted for you to take some of her clothes home. What a lovely way to keep her close.

That photo of you in the stripey t-shirt (sorry, am also late to the party) is amazing, you should definitely be emphasising your lovely figure and waist.

How about a skirt like this?
https://www.zara.com/share/zw-collection-printed-midi-skirt-p02183048.html

Wear with your birks to neutralise the prettiness of it a bit, if you know what I mean.

I would also suggest thinking about metallics as neutrals and not always defaulting to black for sandals.

Cropped isn't a good look unless you are tall, and tend to be favoured by older women. Mad large prints are also nearly always favoured by the over 60s. Very tapered trousers particularly using zips is a teenage look, so best avoided. There are some very good YouTube channels French Chic springs to mind.

I'm 63 and I'm aged by people 50-54. Granted parents genetics help however alot of natural work to help keep my skin and body in good condition.

You're clothing sounds outdated however it's your choice what you wear. If your not happy do something about it.

It's not just clothing that can age you. Accessories and shoes are also a must to look at.Check out your hairstyle, the colour, and make up too.

Grey hair generally is aging. I know I'm unusual for my age. My style is classic punk, rock, grunge, alternative with colour thrown in to make me pop. My hair is now my natural warm colouring of striking copper as I was born a ginger.

Go to your local store and get a free makeover done too to ensure that your makeup isn't aging you either. It's a classic mistake by many as they get older not to check out there makeup and hair.

For those saying about M & S I shudder. I wouldn't go near it. I have an adverse reaction to there. Probably cos it's where my late mom shopped and I'm of a generation where grandparents, parents and offspring dressed from very different shops hence.

The kind of shops I use are alternative and mainly online

Not a thing that I could add that hasn’t been said already but wanted to add to the chorus of what a good sport you are OP - you’ve taken some pretty sharp knocks on the chin and seeing the evolution of your outfits has been lovely.

You’ve now hit the target of dressing younger - your clothes fit and are definitely more current.

Spend the next weeks and months thinking about what you love to wear. This will be very dependent on what you do day to day. I work in a pretty formal environment and go out a fair bit to relatively formal events so I love a big bow, a velvet sling back, a heavy embroidered skirt etc. although I do also spend time in jeans and flats. I just like to make sure they err on the side of interesting to dramatic depending on my mood.

Maybe you should get over your prejudice @keffie12. M&S has completely transformed in the last couple of years. It’s where I bought my universally admired faux leather jacket and denim work jacket. There are gems to be found in the shoe section too.

If it's the faux leather jacket I think it is....I bought one for my 44 yr old daughter for Christmas and she lives in it, this over 70 chose well!

For those saying about M & S I shudder. I wouldn't go near it. I have an adverse reaction to there. Probably cos it's where my late mom shopped and I'm of a generation where grandparents, parents and offspring dressed from very different shops hence.
If you never go near the place, why comment?

Nice job, OP! Your outfits are looking great (its always fun to play about with your style😄).

It is annoying how old and frumpy appears to be a whole style definition. Really its just media and shops convincing us that past a certain age we should be funneled into 'these' shops or 'those' brands.
Its the cuts and colours that look old not us!

Im over 50 and may wear a pouffy dress one day, goth or boho the next.....maybe dungarees or an all vintage look the next. I mean nobody has ever said I look good but they've never said I look old either and more importantly Im happy!
The older women I admire have never been the very classic, expensive looking ones, its the ones who stride out in bright colours, sequinned and feathers and dont give a rats arse about anybodys opinion!

For those saying about M & S I shudder. I wouldn't go near it. I have an adverse reaction to there. Probably cos it's where my late mom shopped and I'm of a generation where grandparents, parents and offspring dressed from very different shops hence.

Agree that you're missing out - no-one's saying it's all marvellous, but there is some fabulous stuff in there these days, and they are particularly great at jeans at the moment I think.

That woman with the ‘dresses not to wear over 50’ and the too dark hair - I wouldn’t wear any of those clothes either if I actually looked as old as she does or had short pixie cut hair - but I don’t - it’s about an overall ‘look’ and the striped top Parisian style French kind of chic is just one way to look- why shouldn’t someone who is70 wear long flowing boho dresses or goth style or whatever suits her overall look - I often feel they are trying to make us all look like late middle aged American news readers - who cares if it’s the most flattering or not in fashion - surely it’s about feeling good in yourself -

For the poster who is banging on about femininity being youthful, style is about channeling and curating the person you are in a way that enhances and makes the wearer appear natural and comfortable.

This is hilarious.

Most women I know who have had successful careers - me included - have done well because our intelligence, expertise, professionalism and EQ speaks for itself.

@keffie12 I’m afraid when I read posts like yours that say you’d never go near what is a perfectly average shop that sells everything from packets of decent knickers to cashmere loungewear and some fabulous gems of both clothing and skincare in between, all made available on virtually every high street l’m going to disregard everything else you say because it’s just a bit too i’M nOT LikE tHe oTHeR giRls for me to take seriously.

I think we all need to get over the idea that being over 60 is old.
There are some fabulous women who are 60+ and do not fit the 'granny' stereotype that seems to be on MN.

Most of my 60+ friends who take care of themselves- slim, good hair, very few wrinkles, make up etc- look better than some women of 45 - who are overweight, unkempt hair, not a scrap of make up and have presumably 'given up'.

It's a controversial point but UK women tend, on the whole, not to take as much care of their appearances as French, Italian or Spanish women. Most women in the UK are overweight/obese (almost 70%), don't wear make up, don't 'bother' with their hair much,etc.

I knew a French woman (in the UK) who even when she was in the supermarket looked gorgeous- clothes, hair done, immaculate make up.

I wait to be flamed 😀

I’ve really enjoyed this thread. My main take on it isn’t that trends work to keep you looking good-it’s clothes that fit. M and S is mentioned a lot here-yes they have some style led stuff but I tend not to buy things from there because they don’t fit me well. So trousers, dresses, coats, whatever will always look frumpy even though they look good on others. But whatever they style and way people like to dress, if it fits well and looks like it should, then it looks better. Frumpy, worn, ill fitting stuff will age someone, whether too small or too big. Certain cuts and shapes will suit different body types-dress for that rather than very trend led. The OP isn’t trying to look as if she’s wearing what 25 year olds wear-she just wants to look good and she’s been an inspiration to those of us who are older but still like clothes.

Just me making a response that's all. My opinion. It doesn't change the world or matter. My own random thoughts out loud

The best thing you can do to keep looking better as you age is to keep your weight down. (Not be underweight either and look scrawny.)

The difference with younger and older women is often body shape and having a waist.

It's not inevitable to lose your waist post menopause if you maintain a healthy diet and weight.