My clothes are aging me - please help?

[Nifty50something]

The other day someone mistook me for being over 60 when I'm actually in my early 50s. I asked a good friend about it and she said it's because my clothes are aging me. I've never followed fashion and tend to just wear what's comfortable, shop second hand or from m&s, etc. But I'd like to try to update my look.

I've been wearing:

1. Cropped jeans with zips to make them tapered
2. Black cigarette trousers tapered at the ankle
3. Midi dresses with nice patterns (not flower patterns but more aztec or palm print).

Are any of the above items still ok or are they all frumpy? Any links to things you've bought and love? What are the trends now (I think barrel leg trousers, denim jackets or cropped trench jackets, pink...also waistcoats without a top underneath which I wouldnt wear but could wear one over a top if that would work)?

Nothing wrong with looking 60 but I'm just not there yet and would prefer to look my age!

Lovely comment, and I agree with all you say.

I'm sorry OP but the waistcoat detracts, if anything, it's the wrong length for a start and the shoes look like the ones our Mother Superior from my convent school wore, back in the 70s/early 80s.

However, as the poster I quoted above says, I would be less inclined to let what you wear, influence me, and more interested just in you

I'm 5'4" and ten stone. Any outfit suggestions would be very welcome please as that dress and waistcoat combo was me trying my best!

I’ve recently bought some quite cheap linen mix wide leg trousers from M and S in a few colours (black, white, beige) and they are very flattering. That palate also works with everything.

Don't be so patronizing and condescending, I'm fast approaching 60 and would absolutely die if someone thought I was a lot older.

I’m the same age as you. I love the print of your dress but the collar style does seem very…sensible.
I don’t wear wide legged trousers, they don’t suit me and I don’t feel comfortable. In the last few years I’ve finally found my own style and it’s generally either plain hiking dress and straw trilby, with Birkenstock thong sandals, or harem trousers with a deep bound cuff and sandals along with a statement T shirt (usually feminist or literary slogans lol) and denim jacket and a kufiya scarf. Jeans would be slim, worn with really nice boots and a good quality wool jumper and a wow coat.
This all works for me and I get so many compliments, which I’ve never had before, maybe because I finally feel comfortable and confident in myself, I don’t know. I add nice earrings, bangles, etc too.

Lighthearted?

Denim jacket with the dress and update your shoes.

https://www.marksandspencer.com/denim-jacket-with-stretch/p/clp60497153#intid=pid_pg1pip48g2r1c1
Shoes

https://www.marksandspencer.com/lace-up-trainers/p/clp60691899?color=WHITE#intid=pid_pg1pip48g2r1c2

https://www.marksandspencer.com/lace-up-trainers/p/clp60691899?color=WHITE#intid=pid_pg1pip48g2r1c2

Book a complimentary personal stylist apt at John lewis, they will suggest colours & styles that suit you. You don't have to but what they suggest but you can take note of shapes & styles & buy from elsewhere.

https://www.johnlewis.com/our-services/personal-styling

Waistcoats are having a moment OP, but not open like you’ve worn yours. They’re done up without anything underneath. The high street is full of them, especially ones with tie-fronts.

They look good with slouchy wide legged trousers.

I would wear those shoes in winter with black opaque tights and a shorter dress not in summer op.

I think your dress would look better with black flip flop style sandals. M&S and Other Stories have gold or silver chunkier necklaces and bracelets which would update your dress too.
That waistcoat I'd wear with jeans (M&S have a huge variety -straight, wide, barrel maybe go and try and see what suits ) and a good oversized white shirt or a good boxy t shirt (I like weekend and Cos for t shirts).I'm 52 btw.

My best buy is a black oversized blazer which I wear with jeans over a t-shirt, over dresses etc.It really pulls an outfit together. Mine is M&S and was about £45 but I've seen the same one on vinted cheap and in other colours.

Trainers with wide leg jeans are a staple for me. A colourful pair of Adidas make a dress or skirt look more modern.Try trainers in the shop for size then look on Vinted if you are on a budget.

@CapaciousHag I love your wit! I am 68 and love took good. The one dress that had people chasing me down the street I bought 10 years ago for a music festival from a fancy dress shop.it was a rainbow sequin dress. This before the big rainbow trend started. This spring I have bought a cream fitted waistcoat, a crochet waistcoat and a mock suede jacket...as seen on social media as I follow a few influencers in their late 50's. Can I ask what beautiful clothes you buy please?

My favourite jeans ATM are from New Look...wide legged ones recommended on here. Haven't bought from NL in years but I get compliments whenever I wear them even from my teen girls.

The clothing here isn’t the issue. It’s the combination and the dress is too small. Waist coat with jeans. Waist coat over jeans does not work. And the shoes need black tights. They’re too chunky for the bare leg look.

I have realised the one thing that was making me look a bit dated was…. my hair!
I also thing if you embrace a trend when past 50, like barrel leg jeans, unless you are 5ft 10 and a size 8, you’re going to look like a… barrel! Well, I do.
Having a contemporary haircut and colour, updating your make up and a few new cool pieces of jewellery are instant updates which makes so much difference.
I’ve just bought a blazer style cardigan from Zara, and when I blow dried my hair, lots of bounce, I looked like Hyacinth Bucket!
I don’t wear trends now, but stick to decent, dark denim straight leg jeans, really beautiful crisp white shirts, and for day dresses I go to Cos. I buy less and less now.
Keeping it simple is far better than try to track trends as invariably we can get them badly wrong. That’s my humble opinion. And I still wear a midi dress!

Get on instagram. There are loads of people your age and size.

impolife
Wearsmymoney
Thefashion_lift

It’s the shoes c

After years of baggy tops over skinny bottoms, fashion has reversed and skinny, close fitting tops over wide legged bottoms are in fashion at the moment. That's why you're looking older than your age. I follow a Polish woman on Instagram who is in her early 60s but dresses in modern styles. She mostly shops in Zara, H&M etc.

The dress is fine, but the colour and pattern slightly overwhelm you. I'm a similar height and weight and I love wide legged trousers with a close fitting top. Before you go out and start buying everything from scratch, identify what gaps you have in your wardrobe and what you need to buy. Don't buy single pieces unless you can think of three other items to wear with them, or three separate occasions on which to wear the item.

I am just under 5 foot, 8 stone 11 and a size 8/10. Have been much heavier in weight and always on a budget. Over the years I have learnt what suits me best and also my style has changed to to being retired and very active as in walking etc. Uniqlo, H&M, Zara and sometimes M&S are good places to go but I also find Primark quite good these days. Believe it or not I got a beautiful fitted and lined cream waistcoat to wear on its own with jeans on Tik Tok for £8...around £35 in M&S. Always buy decent leather shoes though..Gabor are a favourite brand.

Have a look at ‘nobody’s child’. not hugely fashion-y but a good step into something more current.

I’m afraid the dress and waistcoat have to go. It’s the neckline and sleeve length on that dress that isn’t working.

I quite like the shoes in a retro way!

A good haircut and colour always works!

I like the shoes but they don’t work with the dress (only imo). They look too ‘heavy’ for the light weight dress I think. The dress print is ok but the style of sleeve and neckline aren’t great, and the length is really frumpy (or looks it in the pic, sorry), go longer or shorter to avoid the frump. I love a waistcoat, generally worn as a top - this one doesn’t go with the dress (again, sorry) but might work on its own! With loose trousers. Maybe think about one of those personal shopper/stylists, eg from John Lewis? Might give you some ideas you hadn’t thought of. Have fun with it - fashion is your new hobby! You’ll feel great!

Concur with everything @CapaciousHag has said.

The main issue with the palm print dress is that the print makes the dress look like it is too tight/pulling across the bust. Although three items can make a great outfit, none of these items are even halfway decent for a variety of reasons including the fits is off on both the dress and waistcoat, the dress is also a terrible length on you - it is cutting your calf at its widest part. Not a fan of the shoes although I know many on MN do like a chunky DM-style summer sandal.

Before trying to reinvent your wardrobe, spend some time look at people and online platforms be they Pinterest, IG or even multi e-tailer sites such as Net-a-Porter to see how outfits are put together. Take your time to work out what you like and then start trying things on to see what works, what does not. Uniqlo has some amazing gems that can breathe life into any wardrobe. Remember, it's a marathon, not a sprint, so take your time.

I think the dress is a smidge too short and would look better with a different type of shoe. The black is too heavy. ( I actually like the shoe but it’s not screaming spring / summer )
So before you go racing off to buy random items I think it’s important to think about what you actually like and what makes you feel like the best version of yourself. Following a load of influencers can be confusing - a lot of them are high consumers of trend led fashion and they make money by selling products. It’s fine to not be up to date with every trend but it can be helpful to know what’s happening in fashion so you can go for it whole heartedly, do a “lite” version or give it a massive swerve. Janine Jacob’s on Instagram / Tik Tok is a stylist but her remit is helping people find their own style. She has a lot of free content online including videos and a podcast that you can access for free. She has free style guides you can sign up for.

Another resource is a book called The Curated closet which has exercises to help you work out your style

Like lots of people here I do a mixture of trends along with older clothes that fit my aesthetic. ( modern, minimal, structured ) I think a lot about what I wear and I enjoy finding second hand finds. I photograph my outfits daily to give myself a bit of perspective. ( they stay on my phone for me and ChatGPT to analyse ). In your position I’d probably start with an item that’s “ trend adjacent “ - not too trendy but giving a nod. So a wider leg trousers or a straight leg jean. ( this does not have to be super wide it can still be slim if your comfortable with that ). I have a few styles of jeans but my last pair are ankle length Levi 501’s… that is not a super fashionable jean but I will probably wear those longer than my super fashionable jeans and I have some oversized shirts and sandals that will work. On top of that I have a good hairdresser and some accessories that add some individual flair to something simple ( sunglasses or a bag). Im not spending ££££ on designer clothes but I feel more like me at 54 than I did at 44.

I’m 63 and wouldn’t wear any of your clothes, I’m afraid. Try some wide leg trousers and jumpsuits, tops which end at your waist or hip, nice trainers, vans / converse or flat sandals, and wedges or block heels for something a bit more dressy. Avoid anything midi length for skirts or dresses; try knee length or ankle length for something more dressy. Keep away from anything beige or pastel. Go for patterns which are less contrived (I love anything paisley or watercolour-looking). Just as important, get some good underwear, especially well-fitting bras and high-waisted non-vpl knickers, get a good hair cut and colour if you don’t suit grey, lose weight if you need to and lift weights to tone.

I too go for a mix of new, second-hand designer and charity shop / Vinted finds. Once you’ve worked out what suits you, just have fun with it!

I'm a similar shape and age and find this type of dress very flattering: https://www2.hm.com/en_gb/productpage.1214786021.html

You could wear with a denim jacket or an utility jacket like this https://www2.hm.com/en_gb/productpage.1273922003.html

The Sienna jeans from Mango are very flattering https://www2.hm.com/en_gb/productpage.1273922003.html

For footwear I'd wear sandals, espadrilles, ballerinas or trainers.

If you love those shoes and the Toast aesthetic, maybe high street fashion is not the vibe you want? There are some great brands out there with a more vintage/utilitarian vibe. Uniqlo has some things in a similar style too. If these are too pricey, you can definitely look for them on eBay and Vinted etc.

https://www.oliveclothing.com/women/
https://www.katebarton.co.uk
https://palava.co (quirkier, but similar vintage shapes)