My clothes are aging me - please help?

[Nifty50something]

The other day someone mistook me for being over 60 when I'm actually in my early 50s. I asked a good friend about it and she said it's because my clothes are aging me. I've never followed fashion and tend to just wear what's comfortable, shop second hand or from m&s, etc. But I'd like to try to update my look.

I've been wearing:

1. Cropped jeans with zips to make them tapered
2. Black cigarette trousers tapered at the ankle
3. Midi dresses with nice patterns (not flower patterns but more aztec or palm print).

Are any of the above items still ok or are they all frumpy? Any links to things you've bought and love? What are the trends now (I think barrel leg trousers, denim jackets or cropped trench jackets, pink...also waistcoats without a top underneath which I wouldnt wear but could wear one over a top if that would work)?

Nothing wrong with looking 60 but I'm just not there yet and would prefer to look my age!

I find if I look after my feet generally, wearing shoes with arch support, etc, much of the time and good orthotics in my winter boots, I can manage something more elegant occasionally or when I have to. Never heels but I didn't do those in my 20s either.

We all forget how much time we spend in our slippers and my plantar fascitis(sp) recovered when I dealt with that.

I love my pretty feet, my best feature lol! Doesn't say much about the rest of me! So I loved summer sandals, all straps and dainty but I've got metatarsalgia, nerve pain and I can't wear such pretty shoes now but found ok alternatives. I too love winter boots, leather and got red, green as well as the brown and black ones. I keep feet looking good , no crusty heels and always varnish nails. Never had a pedicure just regular foot care at home. Good for morale too!

OP I think birkenstocks and trainers are good options for you. I like your chunky black sandals but they do kill some of your outfits as they're a strong option. I like flat/chunky shoes and I think a couple of people have got a bit carried away encouraging you to buy coloured sandals and wedges. You have your own sense of style. It's important not to throw the baby out with the bathwater.

I agree with that. Also if you’re aiming for a younger look you need to check out what young people are wearing and aim for a version of that. Young women aren’t wearing pretty shoes with wedges and thin straps, they’re wearing Birkies, fisherman’s sandals and trainers.

I like some of those!

I'd advise anyone to ignore @Isabellivi 's advice, not because all of it is wrong, but because it seems so patronising. That floral fabric looks like upholstery fabric.

When I was a long haired brunette with olive skin I looked blah in yellow. I tried brown, my sons said that I looked like a poop.

Now I'm a long haired silver fox I go for pink , purple, cream, teal tops/ Jumpers in the winter. Dresses with a subtle pattern although I did buy a red tartan for Christmas.

Summer. I'm into stripes so RL type boyfriend shirts. Solid block dresses .

I can't wear heels anymore with sciatica and a dodgy hip which grieves me but cest la vie. I seek out pretty flats.

My mother and MIL were snappy dressers always bang on trend. Until their bodies gave out. I'm sure if theyd had dressers like the royals to pull on their clothes, do up their zips they'd have utilised them.

@Nifty50something Blimey! Well done

And I am very envious of your waist. I've never had one of those!

I'm not sure if it's been mentioned but this woman's youtube channel has some good tips for what sorts of things make women over 50 look older or frumpy.
https://www.youtube.com/@MarieAnneLecoeur

Please, please can we ban the word “frumpy”?

The advice is good but it's from someone with hair that looks too dark for the complexion, lipstick that looks harsh, and wearing a hideous floral shirt.

She looks frumpy in her bright pink shirt, hair's too dark and unflattering and she looks early 70s to me.

These 'style gurus are self- appointed 'experts'. They're doing these videos to make money, that's all.

I couldn't disagree more. If your style has always been masculine/androgynous a sudden change to flowing skirts and florals isn't going to make you look younger, it'll do the opposite, as though you've suddenly decided you need to wear your grandma's clothes.

More "mannish" clothing and hairstyles can accentuate your assets, are practical and just suit some women more than skirts and dresses. I feel distinctly odd and just not myself in a dress. It's nothing to do with my body, it's about style and feeling myself, whether I'm 6 or 60.

@Nifty50something You don't need to dress 'younger' you just need to find a style that suits you and your personality.
And that includes your hair, make up and accessories. Have you considered growing your hair? I know it's cliche but short hair can be ageing.

There is no point trying to emulate women aged 20 or 30.

I take issue with the concept that your clothes made you look over 60 because it suggests women over 60 are old and unfashionable.

Looking at your first photos, I'd say the clothes look 'dull' even if someone aged 30 wore them. It's not to do with age.

The other photos are better and my opinion is you should move away from shirts that are checks and stripes as they can look masculine, tucked into jeans.

You don't suit high necks (eg shirt collars) and should go for V necks, scooped necks, etc.

I agree about her hair and lipstick (not sure which shirt you mean) but if you can overcome her personal look, she has some good tips I think. I don't agree with everything she says but she gets a lot right about what's not flattering for older women eg cropped, loose trousers, shapeless tops and 'house on the prairie' dresses.

Why?

I love your new purchases. The green dress looked amazing and showed off your figure really well. You suit the barrel trousers. Stick with solid colour rather than busy patterns then add jewellery or a scarf to uplift. Longline cardigans for casual or smart jacket for smart.
Shoes are difficult but more and more of the comfort manufacturers are producing better styles.
I bought some sketchers arch range sneakers. Wore them all day walking round Bath. If I’d worn my converse I’d have been in agony. I’ve bought another pair in a different colour and will probably live in them this summer.

@Shetlands , I agreed pretty much with everything, but seriously, that wagging finger

I like the shirt - it would look nice with a short A line mini (same colour as trousers), opaques and knee length boots. Obvs more of a winter work outfit.

But what is an 'older woman'?

For instance, Jigsaw (which is quite middle of the road but pricey) has lots of cropped linen trousers at the moment.

Are we saying they are a no-no for anyone over 50?

By cropped I don't mean those awful pedal pushers, but just a few inches above the ankle.

it'll do the opposite, as though you've suddenly decided you need to wear your grandma's clothes.

Flowing skirts and florals are what grandmothers wear?

You need to get out more.

Shops like &Otherstories are full of flowing skirts and florals . Worn by YOUNG women (and older ones too.)

Just looked at the one about dresses. I agree about the "bad" examples she showed but her alternatives were nearly all sleeveless and showing the upper back and chest. Seeing and exposing a lot of that skin isn't a great look either as it's often sun damaged on older women (and men). Plus her footwear recommendations were then flat plimsolls or heels. Neither are good for the feet or comfortable.

She's playing to the French look. A lot of her bad example dresses were definitely the kind of things you see for sale and worn a lot in French provincial towns and markets. And, yes, her hair dye is far too dark for her.

I keep reading my post because OP sounds so nice and I didn’t want to respond like a jerk…. But my advice is friendly ... I guess some women are offended that femininity makes you look younger. It’s just a fact.

But what is an 'older woman'?
In the context of this thread, I'd say middle-aged or older,.

In defence of the sleeveless dresses, much of France is warmer and sunnier than the UK.

I don't see anything wrong with the word frumpy - I don't think it is limited to an age range, or a sex.

You are disagreeing with something based on your own ideas but not objective reality. Dressing more feminine will make you seem younger. That’s why women tend to dress more masculine in their career, so they are taken more seriously.