What would you wear to a black tie dinner as a 47 year old not-slim woman?

[OlgaFjeldso]

DH and I are invited to a posh evening do, drinks then black tie sit-down dinner.

I will have to buy something new to wear. It’s in May so weather could be hot or cold.

I don’t like floor length dresses, would prefer knee length or just below (but perhaps not formal enough??)
I don’t like high necks.
Prefer something a bit structured or fitted, but I am quite curvy.
Have shoulders and upper arms like a scrum half, so might be better covering those up to attempt elegance - maybe a dress with sleeves or some sort of jacket/shrug/bolero over a sleeveless dress.

Don’t want to spend loads for the sake of it, but on the other hand I hardly ever buy new clothes, and I’d like to look nice.

Any help would be appreciated.

Floor length is white tie, I think. Black tie is knee length.

Navy, long chiffon sleeves - this is lovely and with some dramatic jewellery & a fab hair do would look gorgeous
www.phase-eight.com/product/arwen-silk-maxi-dress-221524351.html#navAjax=true&is=true&cgid=Occasionwear&sz=60&start=0&isSecondPage=false&prefn1=clothingType&prefv1=Dresses&prefn2=knee&prefv2=Maxi%7CMidaxi&prefn3=sleeve&prefv3=3/4%20Sleeve%7CLong%20Sleeve%7CShort%20Sleeve&prefn4=size&prefv4=16&pid=221524351&pos=0

I go to a few black tie events every year and always wear a full length dress. Most women are in long dresses, but there are always a few cocktail length and one or two glitzy jumpsuits.

White tie means sleeves and must be long. Black tie can be long or cocktail length

If the option of the dresses picked by Preciousssssss or my own suggestions were off the table I'd pick that Muthahood dress over every other suggestion. I agree with Preciousssssss about bargain basement Debenhams and those fluttery sleeves.

I could bling the Muthahood dress up with red patent or silver shoes and dramatic costume jewellery. The Phase 8 etc, I'd rather not go than wear it.

Something from Cos.

How strange. I probably attend at least one black tie event a month on average. It sounds like you are describing actual ball gowns which is something different all together I agree, I don’t wouldn’t be wearing one of those. I’m talking more slinky floor and ankle length dresses, plenty of midi as well. Knee length can be a hard length to pull off without looking rather dated imo. Mini would be unusual unless it’s cocktail.

Erm, black tie is supposed to be long.

I have the dress linked, v. comfortable and completely appropriate for black tie IMO.

Nope.

Hobbs have some very nice dresses in at the moment

I attend a lot of black tie events for work that are traditional. I'm a similar age and size, I really like Goddiva the dresses aren't too expensive and have good details like boning or gathers at the stomach.
I have this is really flattering on and you can have less or more cleavage.
https://goddiva.co.uk/products/goddiva-off-the-shoulder-draped-sleeve-maxi-dress-black
They also do lots of long sleeved dresses in various designs although might be too hot for may
https://goddiva.co.uk/products/goddiva-sequin-square-neck-maxi-with-scallop-hem-black

Pretty Kitty do great vintage style dresses that are really good for curves and have some different sleeve styles too.

https://prettykittyfashion.co.uk/collections/party-dresses

It must be industry specific I attend a lot too and never really see anyone in in knee length it's all long.
I'd never attend black tie in a knee length as then there's no risk of being underdressed.

White tie: men wear tail coat, white waistcoat and bow tie, black shoes, women should wear a floor length dress in an evening fabric.
Black tie, dinner jacket and black trousers, white dress shirt, black bow tie, black shoes, women should wear a long dress in chiffon, lace or velvet but can get away with a cocktail dress (knee lenghth) or a tuxedo.
So OP should wear a long dress, or at least a maxi in an evening fabric, or a trouser suit similar - not jump suits etc. This is according to Vogue.
Black tie, dress length is negotiable. White tie must be floor length dress.
If appropriate, I imagine a silk sari would also be ok.

really nice idea! Yves Saint Laurent style smoking jacket and smart trousers

https://www.simplybe.co.uk/shop/p/ck290?optionSize=16

https://www.karenmillen.com/kimono-sleeve-embellished-midaxi-dress/BKK12582-404-18.html?gclsrc=aw.ds&gad_source=1&gbraid=0AAAAACo7BY8pkvWemxV0jW3ERKszW591j

Can anyone say why people seem to be assuming that black tie means some sort of embellishment?

It is perfectly possible to be elegant and dressed up without encrustations of sequins or embroidery.

Karen Millen is a great shout they do some really nice evening wear. Either of these would look great and are long + cover the arms
Printed Viscose Cady Cold Shoulder Maxi Dress With Viscose Georgette Cowl Back | Karen Millen

Viscose Georgette Pleated Lace Panel Woven Maxi Dress | Karen Millen

Not in a rude way but seraphien the pregnancy brand has amazing black tie stuff and would just skim over tummy they are for all sizes of bumps

I’d go straight to the Phase Eight sale section online. Filter for maxi dress and the colours you like. Lots of options under £200

So im a 16 but need an 18 occasionally in dresses as I have big boobs. Have a look at popsy clothing, they are quirky but if you look at their vintage length dresses they’re lovely. I’ve worn them to black tie and always had lots of complements x

https://www.popsyclothing.co.uk/collections/swing-dress/products/marri-black-swing-dress

https://www.popsyclothing.co.uk/collections/swing-dress/products/merle-black-vintage-swing-dress

The model has them accessories with boots which don’t do them justice at all, with a really nice statement of necklace and a pair of heels they look really great plus they have pockets!

Not sure if you're replying to me or not, but I'm not sure why you mention ball gowns- that wasn't what I was talking about.

At the risk of stalking Preciousssssss, I do agree with her comment about embellishments and sequins. A lot of the suggestions to my eye look too fussy and way OTT (and not in a good way)

The question was “what would you wear” - maybe some people just like the opportunity to encrust themselves at dressier events? It’s not necessarily an assumption that one should wear it.