I want to be a glossy 4x4 mum

[glossystyle]

I’ve got major envy for those glossy mums who always look effortlessly put-together, the ones who pull up in a gleaming 4x4, wearing an immaculate coat, perfect jeans, and trainers that somehow look fresh and stylish instead of like they’ve been through a muddy football field. Their hair always seems bouncy, their nails are pristine, and they make juggling kids and life look so chic. I know the reality underneath will be different to this perceived polish but I fantasise about gliding around like a glossy mum.

I’m determined to give my wardrobe and look a bit of an upgrade, but I can’t afford to throw money around. I’m obsessed with Vinted, and I’d love some advice on what kind of brands or key pieces I should be looking for to recreate this vibe. Think understated luxury, nothing that screams flashy, just timeless, polished style. I am 42 and would love to dress youthfully but established.

I also feel like there’s some secret to their beauty routines, always glowing skin, neat nails, and perfectly styled hair that looks natural but clearly isn’t. Is this the magic of a Dyson Airwrap and Charlotte Tilbury, or am I missing something?

Basically, how do I create this effortless gloss without bankrupting myself? And is there anyone else out there reinventing themselves via Vinted too? Would love any tips, tricks, or recommendations to help me nail the look! Thank youuuu.

🤣, you're the one upset at people choosing to dress for their husbands and calling it not healthy.

Breaking news, it's their choice!

I love these threads until they go off on a tangent. It’s not meant to be controversial, it’s a bit of harmless fun in January to feel like you could make yourself feel a bit better by making some little style & beauty tweaks.

Lots of people like to eg get their nails done, or hair done, or wear jewellery or look ‘glamorous’. Rather than being something that is from the 1950s, adorning yourself is actually something that people have done since the Roman times. I don’t dress up for my husband, just for myself. I feel better.

I actually read an article with Nazanin Zaghari-Ratcliffe saying that it became especially important to her to dress up after being released from captivity because one of the ways her captors suppressed her and dehumanised her was by making her wear prison garments and giving her no choice in clothing.

So let people alone. If they want to look more glamorous, great! If you don’t, wear something different. It doesn’t matter.

@Slothlydoesit You're missing the point. I love to be glam and I spend a lot of time on this board. The other posters who've commented on the poster also spend a lot of time on this board and love their clothes. The discussion wasn't about looking glamorous, it was about the attitude.

Goodness! DH and I were out all day y/day and so not picked up these posts until today, there’s rather a lot of them isn’t there and I seem to be mentioned a few times! and yes @Slothlydoesit they do seem to have gone off at a complete tangent! I’ve not had time to read all the posts but from I’ve read I agree with @Cheesyfootballs01 and @Treesandsheepevery The OP from @glossystyle said:
I’ve got major envy for those glossy mums who always look effortlessly put-together, the ones who pull up in a gleaming 4x4, wearing an immaculate coat, perfect jeans, and trainers that somehow look fresh and stylish instead of like they’ve been through a muddy football field. Their hair always seems bouncy, their nails are pristine, and they make juggling kids and life look so chic.
To me the look SHE wanted to achieve was sophisticated, elegant and chic – I’m guessing more Kate Middleton than Katie Price! which is a look I’ve tried to achieve myself and I just gave some tips on that as others did too like @looklikeNigella @Gah234 @littlepiggytoes – and nothing wrong with there tips either – all perfectly good suggestions. Its amazing how just wearing a nice wool coat, a scarf and good footwear can almost instantly give a more sophisticated look and with sites like Vinted it doesn’t need to coast the earth.
Yes, am a bit critical of the fashion choices of Housewives of Wherever and Footballers wives as I am about their gaudy tasteless houses but that’s just my opinion but I’m quite traditional and probably quite old fashioned - after all I am 60!!! In regard to my marriage and dressing for my DH I don’t know if I even mentioned that but have I guess. In one of the post though I wrote about how I was bullied at school and had very low self esteem and no self confidence and no friends at all really until I meet a lovely funny beautiful Irish lady when I was in my late 20s who was in a similar position to me (but tonnes richer!) and that the beauty regimes, our 4 children (who have always been the most important thing to me) and I guess, yes the lifestyle that I had due to DH improved things a lot so yes I dress for him as well as myself and why not? It improved my self confidence and self esteem no end. We’ve been married 34 years and it makes us both happy so don’t knock it as I said in a previous post.😀

TBH I don't think the OP is describing anything she wants to know how to look like a glossy mum

I mentioned this earlier - its how you talk/hold yourself. Probably traits that are hard to learn/unlearn.

@Thursdaygirl yes agree totally it is about old fashioned word 'deportment' and how you talk, being polite and pleasant and speaking in a calm manner and showing an interest in people - all those things add up.

Lip fillers are disgusting and make probably nice mouths pre filler into horrors

@owlexpress thanks, you seem to have been very vocal on this post of judging me and my lack of feminist values and my outdated attitudes - but what have they resulted in? Four happy well balanced grown up children 2 with very good jobs and one self employed and one gone back to college/working part time still living at home., 2 with degrees (our 2 daughters not our 2 sons!). Two grandchildren. 34 years of happy (give or take - we all have ups and downs) marriage. Perhaps you can tell me what I've done wrong? I'd love to know. I really would!!!

It's irrelevant whether they would know. What I meant is that, that type of coat in general and Max Mara as a brand in particular, along with Hermès scarves, is on Char's list of approved brands for being, glossy/elegant/chic etc, etc.

I 'd hate anyone to make the assumption that because I own Max Mara coats and Hermès scarves I'm aspiring to the "glossy 4x4 look" described here.

Obviously I'd fail miserably (no Botox tasteful Cartier jewellery and other than 1 coat no beige, being 3 of the many items missing)

Oh really? Having outdated attitudes and not being a feminist helps your kids to errrr...what have they actually done that most kids don't actually do, like work, study, breed? Mine managed just as well as yours on chipped nail polish and dry shampoo.

If my marriage state was conditional on things on pleasing my husband with my appearance, I could not be happy.

For you it's all about impressing and pleasing others. Acquiescence in shades of beige. That's not what fashion, style and beauty mean to most women nowadays.

Really not enjoying this pile on on @Char65 picking a few sentences out of much longer posts which were totally on topic and taking this light hearted thread into a completely different and quite dark direction. Honestly, some posters are coming across as nasty bullies. Fine to disagree with someone’s opinion - that’s not the issue - but the manner and tone of the disagreement is not OK.

We can all choose how to dress and how we want to parent or relate to our spouses. Those who are describing Char as judgemental are being twice as judgemental. The only difference is Char was expressing a view about a generic look and her comments were not aimed at any previous poster whilst some of the recent posts are judging her personally.

But it's not your husband, so doesn't apply.

It was in reference to people saying if you look after yourself that much, you dont have time for the kids.

They both like the fashion, which no one is saying you have to copy.

Some of this is really quite cruel towards people who hold different opinions. It’s so unkind to make horrible, personal comments about people’s life choices on a board which by its very nature is about ‘shallow’ things if that’s how you chose to view anything looks related. Everyone is different and choose different ways to live their lives. Different things make different people happy. I see it as so far from feminist to persecute other women just for different views on fashion, roles within the home and workplace or because they are of a different generation to me.

This thread is meant to about looking like a glossy 4x4 mum- it’s really not going to be everyone’s cup of tea. But it doesn’t mean you need to pile on to one person and attack them for what they think makes someone look good.

Back to the non- feminist stuff. I have a lovely navy wool coat that should be the epitome of glossy mum but tends to get hairy and fluffy and look more thrift shop granny. Does navy always do this? I like wearing wool jumpers and it seems impossible to stay neat.

This thread had been rocking for weeks.

Skincare-wise, the Beauty of Joseon glass skin kit is a winner. There's quite a bit already about Korean skincare here.

Get a Vitamin C cream to use with it in the morning, and a Tretinoin formula for at night. I get mine from Monderma and at 42, my skin has a more even texture and glow than it did at 22. Dermatica and Skin&Me both sell it too. A must.

I also get tret from them and it's without a doubt the best skincare ingredient for a glow. I have friends in their mid 50s on it who have "glass skin".

If you can afford to shell out £450 the Dyson Airwrap will make you feel noticeably better about your hair. It takes me 10 minutes every second morning.

So I have just read this thread and it is absolutely ridiculous. We are all individuals and have a different look. I personally cannot stand changing clothes every day for a dog walk / meeting friends etc . Thankfully my friends really don’t care what I am dressed in 🤷‍♀️Have got a friends big birthday next week at Battersea in rooftop bar …am not stressing about how to dress.

How did you find your way to the Style and Beauty board, @Rubbishcrabbycarehomeowners?

(There was, btw, no need to quote the OP in full as it is what everyone here has been discussing.)

I wonder if a capsule wardrobe is wanted. There is a ton of info on you tube and on the internet especially as it is January.

This sort of thing?

https://www.vogue.com/the-essentials-edit?share=app

@Katrinawaves Thanks for this - this is what I posted earlier on this thread.

So this is slightly off topic but I’ve been called a Trophy Wife and a docile show pony before now and when I was at school I was bullied by both teachers and other girls and had no friends and had very low self-esteem and no confidence and at work I was bullied my managers as well to some extent (there is something about me/my personality which seems to attracts a lot of bullying/criticism/put downs)...

and so it carries on but I don't care now, I've got a loving family - I don't care what anyone else thinks. People have there opinions and I have mine. All that's important to me is my husband, my children and now my grandchildren. Nothing else matters to me.

With fear of being critised I think this look smart and is something I would certainly wear.

This thread is meant to about looking like a glossy 4x4 mum- it’s really not going to be everyone’s cup of tea. But it doesn’t mean you need to pile on to one person and attack them for what they think makes someone look good.

Quite. If @Char65 is happy then that’s fine with me and I’m happy to chat about fashion with her.

I have no idea what you're doing here

Why are you on Style and Beauty then? More importantly, why, 20 pages in, did you feel the need to quote the whole of the OP??