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Original poster

I want to be a glossy 4x4 mum

536 replies

glossystyle · 27/12/2024 20:48

I’ve got major envy for those glossy mums who always look effortlessly put-together, the ones who pull up in a gleaming 4x4, wearing an immaculate coat, perfect jeans, and trainers that somehow look fresh and stylish instead of like they’ve been through a muddy football field. Their hair always seems bouncy, their nails are pristine, and they make juggling kids and life look so chic. I know the reality underneath will be different to this perceived polish but I fantasise about gliding around like a glossy mum.

I’m determined to give my wardrobe and look a bit of an upgrade, but I can’t afford to throw money around. I’m obsessed with Vinted, and I’d love some advice on what kind of brands or key pieces I should be looking for to recreate this vibe. Think understated luxury, nothing that screams flashy, just timeless, polished style. I am 42 and would love to dress youthfully but established.

I also feel like there’s some secret to their beauty routines, always glowing skin, neat nails, and perfectly styled hair that looks natural but clearly isn’t. Is this the magic of a Dyson Airwrap and Charlotte Tilbury, or am I missing something?

Basically, how do I create this effortless gloss without bankrupting myself? And is there anyone else out there reinventing themselves via Vinted too? Would love any tips, tricks, or recommendations to help me nail the look! Thank youuuu.

OP posts:
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14
Petra42 · 13/01/2025 06:36

I've really let myself go and have a thick puffer jacket, leggings, coloured socks and trainers. I don't even brush my hair anymore even though i have great hair! Reading this thread has given me the ooomph I need! I'm freezing though all the time so my coat is a godsend...

Petra42 · 13/01/2025 06:43

Genuinely asking what's the alternative to fleece lined leggings when it's cold?

Ciri · 13/01/2025 06:46

Petra42 · 13/01/2025 06:43

Genuinely asking what's the alternative to fleece lined leggings when it's cold?

I often wear fleece lined leggings under a dress so they look like tights

FormerlyPathologicallyHappy · 13/01/2025 06:54

You can get fleece lined tights.

Preciousssssss · 13/01/2025 08:54

Petra42 · 13/01/2025 06:43

Genuinely asking what's the alternative to fleece lined leggings when it's cold?

Do you have a good wool coat that reaches at least mid calf level?

And warm jumpers to wear over thermal underpinnings?

And knee high leather boots? (Socks or tights as you prefer.)

And a knitted hat and decent gloves?

In that case you can wear any skirt you choose - doesn’t even need to be a heavy winter fabric.

Alternatively, if you only have a shorter wool coat, maybe to your knees, you’ll be fine with wool twill / tweed / flannel trousers, or cords and either ankle boots or chunky loafers (to keep you feet off the ground) or trainers if you must. Woollen socks are best. Either way you’ll be warm as toast.

I don’t think I’ve ever worn a pair of fleece lined leggings other than on a mountainside in snow.

Char65 · 13/01/2025 09:37

CinnamonJellyBeans · 12/01/2025 19:04

What is "tasteful" jewellery @Char65 ? Are you afraid of being denounced by Tatty Devine?

The look you're going for is one that portrays the wearer has time and money to spend on themselves. It sends a message about your lifestyle. It's been carefully crafted (you'd probs call it "curated"). It's all very restrained.

@CinnamonJellyBeans for me it is tasteful well made quality pieces which last forever like Cartier, Tiffany and Bulgari - certainly not Tatty Devine!!! but not too much like Housewives of wherever and footballers wives - just earrings, a necklace, a bracelet wedding and engagement ring and another ring or perhaps two bu as you say understated. Too much jewellry ruins a look and looks 'cheap' (though could be very expensive!)

Char65 · 13/01/2025 09:40

Treesandsheepeverywhere · 12/01/2025 22:45

Or maybe not.

Or she might also want to trade.

Or the marriage isn't just based on looks.

As long as she's happy, that's what matters.

Show quote history

Thanks @Treesandsheepeverywhere we have now been married 34 years so I guess we're doing somehting right!!!

Treesandsheepeverywhere · 13/01/2025 09:47

Char65 · 13/01/2025 09:40

Thanks @Treesandsheepeverywhere we have now been married 34 years so I guess we're doing somehting right!!!

Show quote history

❤️.
If one is ever to be traded in, at least do it in style 😎.

Preciousssssss · 13/01/2025 09:51

Too much jewellry ruins a look and looks 'cheap' (though could be very expensive!)

Honestly? I’d rather be Michèle Lamy …

I want to be a glossy 4x4 mum
Treesandsheepeverywhere · 13/01/2025 09:54

Preciousssssss · 13/01/2025 09:51

Too much jewellry ruins a look and looks 'cheap' (though could be very expensive!)

Honestly? I’d rather be Michèle Lamy …

Different people, different styles.

Nothing wrong with either.

Dreamingofgoldfinchlane · 13/01/2025 10:02

You can't fake looking rich. Glossy skin and hair comes from lots of time to spend on self care and great genetics to work with.

AsFunAsEnglishWeather · 13/01/2025 11:01

Look for high end athleisure brands on Vinted such as Varley - and get your colours done so you kow that what you're buying is flattering you skin.

RunSlowTalkFast · 14/01/2025 07:40

This reminds me of the old 'how to look expensive threads' (look them up if you want more inspiration!)

The problem with these threads is that people always have very different ideas of what looks classy.

Someone mentioned Lydia Tomlinson but when I looked her up this was one of the first photos. To me this looks more Love Island: Winter Edition!

I want to be a glossy 4x4 mum
Preciousssssss · 14/01/2025 08:07

Ha! The how to look expensive threads always boiled down to be White, be blond, be thin.

If one dared to suggest a look or person that didn’t fit that model a million posters would rush to tell you your example could only be ‘cool’ or ‘funky’ or some such shit …

IHaveNeverLivedintheCastle · 14/01/2025 09:07

Petra42 · 13/01/2025 06:36

I've really let myself go and have a thick puffer jacket, leggings, coloured socks and trainers. I don't even brush my hair anymore even though i have great hair! Reading this thread has given me the ooomph I need! I'm freezing though all the time so my coat is a godsend...

Reading this thread almost makes me want to ditch my Max Mara coats in case anyone thinks that by wearing them I'm trying to aim for this look.

Char65's posts are well, I'm not sure what I can say that won't get me deleted.

From this thread generally I can add "tasteful", "timeless" and "simple" to the list of cringemaking clichés along with "frumpy" and "flattering"

IHaveNeverLivedintheCastle · 14/01/2025 09:28

And "sophisticated" and "chic" can go in that list of tired clichés too.
"Elegant" can get a pass - greyhounds and horses are elegant.

Char65 · 14/01/2025 16:41

@IHaveNeverLivedintheCastle

Char65's posts are well, I'm not sure what I can say that won't get me deleted.

Really? Why's that?

Treesandsheepeverywhere · 14/01/2025 20:15

IHaveNeverLivedintheCastle · 14/01/2025 09:07

Reading this thread almost makes me want to ditch my Max Mara coats in case anyone thinks that by wearing them I'm trying to aim for this look.

Char65's posts are well, I'm not sure what I can say that won't get me deleted.

From this thread generally I can add "tasteful", "timeless" and "simple" to the list of cringemaking clichés along with "frumpy" and "flattering"

Show quote history

How would they know they're Max Mara though? Those who know how to look put together can do so with a Zara coat or whatever as much as a Max Mara can look basic on someone else.

Everyone's opinions are valid, we can't all agree on the same thing.

Cheesyfootballs01 · 14/01/2025 22:36

IHaveNeverLivedintheCastle · 14/01/2025 09:07

Reading this thread almost makes me want to ditch my Max Mara coats in case anyone thinks that by wearing them I'm trying to aim for this look.

Char65's posts are well, I'm not sure what I can say that won't get me deleted.

From this thread generally I can add "tasteful", "timeless" and "simple" to the list of cringemaking clichés along with "frumpy" and "flattering"

Show quote history

In fairness going from what you have posted in the past, your style is more mill girl/sister wives/Amish whereas @Char65 has a posted about a completely different atheistic.

Neither opinions are wrong, just different styles.

I don’t think anyone should be judged or sneered at just because they favour a look that you don’t like.

owlexpress · 14/01/2025 22:50

@Cheesyfootballs01 while I don't disagree with your comments about aesthetics, I suspect people are taking issue with Char65's outdated attitude and utter lack of feminist values rather than her outfits. And I do think it's okay to judge those.

littleteapot86 · 14/01/2025 22:57

Char65 · 31/12/2024 16:18

Yes I agree with this I my DH was a very high earner from a rich family and I was a SAHM with an allowance and a credit card! We had four children who were my life and certainly not neglected all. They were private school educated but not boarding. My children always came FIRST. I had help in the house too so had a lot of time and almost limitless amounts of money to spend on my appearance so could always look good which DH loved. It is hard if trying to juggle, budget, work childcare etc. As others have said most women I knew like me were in the same boat. It does take time, there's no question. In the NY I will post my beauty regime if it is helpful & fav brands. I'm 60 now and DH 72 so things have changed a bit but I still keep to the same standards, as the song says 'it is a hard habit to break' once you do become 'glossy' - others expect it of you. I was once asked to be the guest of honour (handing out prizes on prize day) at our children's school though had no 'qualification' bar being a mother of our children their but I guess I looked good in photos!😀Happy New Year to you all.

Show quote history

Did you post your regime and fave beauty brands? Id love to know!

littleteapot86 · 14/01/2025 23:02

Char65 · 07/01/2025 09:32

Hi, sorry for the delay its been a bit hectic after Charismas and New Year what with one think and another and not looked at MN for a while. So to reply @glossystyle and others I think what she wants is a look that is sophisticated, chic, timeless and elegant which is the what I have always strived for to. I think we are talking Kate M; Queen Letizia of Spain and Princess Di and even Jennifer Anniston rather than Footballers wives and The Housewives of wherever which tend to be a tarty look showing too much flesh and wearing too much bling – less is always more! I myself came from a very ordinary family but I was lucky and married a wealthy guy when I was 25, he was 38 and was a SAHM with an allowance in 1990 so had time to spend on beauty, some of the elements were there already - good skin, a slim figure and blonde hair but I was able to improve myself through a beauty regime, a dressing room and gym membership! The 90’s was a good decade for fashion and beauty as it was a very natural look and skinny eyebrows (unlike the dreadful 80’s) and that’s continued pretty much. We had 4 kids and I was a SAHM so I was able to go to a beauty salon every week and so of course have picked up masses of tips over the year and I would therefore say the following:

Health

  • Good skin care, day and night moisturiser. Cleansing, exfoliation, toning, serums, Botox, eye creams, masks, SPF, facials. Keeping out of the sun – I know a lot of women my age who are now in incredibly wrinkled – suntan is just burnt skin. Where as I myself look younger.
  • Spa treatments/aromatherapy.
  • Exercise – NO SMOKING – - bad for your health and makes your clothes and hair smell – terrible habit - limited alcohol. Careful what you eat.
  • Healthy diet – I’ve always loved cooking with fresh ingredients so no ready meals – high in salt, sugar avoid UPFs.
Beauty
  • Wash and blow dry your hair every day.
  • Nice hands (use hand creams) with lovely nails – manicured nails always look good and pedicures for the summer sandals.
  • Teeth – straightened and having them whitened or veneers.
  • Slim figure.
Fashion
  • Nice, elegant stylish shoes always with a heel. Ankle boots and knee high boots always look elegant.
  • Tailored suits/tailored trousers always look chic..
  • Nice trousers – sometimes I’d slip into a pair of leather trousers for the school run or to go shopping – always made a splash.
  • Elegant dresses and skirts – skirt and dresses mid-calf length always look elegant, (knife) pleated skirts look good on most body shapes. Statement pieces like perhaps a leather or suede skirt though faux is very in vogue now.
  • Trench coats (I’ve just bought one form Loro Piana) or luxurious cashmere coats, box jackets always look good.
  • Knitwear – cashmere sweaters and cardigans.
  • Accessories like a Chanel handbag or a Hermes scarf, sunglasses, belts, hats (bat as a PP pointed out not for the school run!).
  • Timeless jewellery – but not too much. Wedding ring engagement ring, plus another ring, bracelet, necklace or pendant, earrings.
  • Dress age appropriate.
  • Luxurious lingerie to make you feel feminine!
  • And of course, a lovely perfume!

Make-up brands I’ve used over the years are Clinique, Lancôme, No7, L’Oreal, Bobbi Brown, Maybelline, Tom Ford, Charlotte Tilbury, MAC face and body, Chanel and clothing brands I like are Gucci, Vince, Balenciaga, Tom Ford, Max Mara (probably my favourite), Alexander McQueen, Loro Piana.

Anyway, hope this helps! You’ll be surprised what clothes/dressing well can do. All the best!

Sorry Char65 I've now just seen this post!

IHaveNeverLivedintheCastle · 14/01/2025 23:27

owlexpress · 14/01/2025 22:50

@Cheesyfootballs01 while I don't disagree with your comments about aesthetics, I suspect people are taking issue with Char65's outdated attitude and utter lack of feminist values rather than her outfits. And I do think it's okay to judge those.

Indeed.
Char65's posts read like some sort of early 1950s tips for a happy marriage.

There is also a fair amount of sneering about "Housewives from wherever" , footballer's wives looking tarty and too much jewellery looking cheap.

Treesandsheepeverywhere · 15/01/2025 08:45

owlexpress · 14/01/2025 22:50

@Cheesyfootballs01 while I don't disagree with your comments about aesthetics, I suspect people are taking issue with Char65's outdated attitude and utter lack of feminist values rather than her outfits. And I do think it's okay to judge those.

Why do you need to judge her though if she's happy with her life?

She doesn't need to share your values.

People are free to live their lives hoe they choose.

IHaveNeverLivedintheCastle · 15/01/2025 08:47

Treesandsheepeverywhere · 15/01/2025 08:45

Why do you need to judge her though if she's happy with her life?

She doesn't need to share your values.

People are free to live their lives hoe they choose.

Show quote history

Well Char is happy to judge other women who don't meet her standards of chic, elegant sophistication who are "tarty" and "cheap".