Toasties - the countdown to Christmas

[Countmeout]

Just getting a thread ready.

@Stravaig - you have reminded me that I went to a coding for beginners class and created a flashing house with code that I proudly kept on a floppy disc for many many years 😹

@IlovePond 😍 Nostalgia! My first was a recursive Hello World, also in rainbow colours. BBC Basic on a BBC micro? Seemed to be standard for early school computing labs.

Maybe if we derail with enough retro geekery, the thread Gods will trigger a Toast sale just to get us back on topic?

I'm sure there's a ZX Spectrum cassette loading screen lovingly archived lurking, waiting, neon screeching, somewhere on YouTube :D

@Stravaig, I had a ZX Spectrum at home too and use the BBC computers. I don't remember too much about writing basic though. I returned to coding when I did a Masters degree in my 40s and earlier this year got my first proper full time job as a developer at the age of 54.

@Netcam That's impressive, and inspiring! What do you code in these days?

I did research in AI through the 90's, and played in various languages, but never expert in any of them. Probably obsolete by now :)

Thanks for the replies @Stoic123 and @IlovePond I feel a bit more reassured it is a lovely dress .
This is the fabric label which is quite cheap and plastic feeling.

Here's my grey needlecord franca from a few years ago - maybe about 2018?

JavaScript and PHP. What do you do now?

Well done @Netcam ! That is seriously impressive.

I have remembered that I once had a graduate interview as a trainee computer programmer, (which was hilarious as I am NOT at all techy, but there were no jobs around at the time and other post uni friends were stuffing chickens, etc.)

I sailed through the interview questions, lots of ticks and positive feedback, (I was one of only two girls amongst a sea of guys and I think the interviewer got excited!)

Then came the practical - maths flowcharts - which I couldn’t make head nor tail of, having never seen one before 🙈

I am ashamed to say that me and the other girl threw our hands up in despair and went sightseeing instead 🙈🙈🙈🙈

I am keeping fingers crossed for a pre-Xmas sale!

Life has taken a few hairpin turns since then!

Most recently Long Covid - not entirely sure if my brain is going to rewire fully, or how it will work, or what I'll be able to do going forward. MN is a handy cognitive rehab tool in the meantime :D

@Stravaig thank-you looks the same as mine .

I'm hoping for a sale soon too,

Sorry tagged the wrong person thank-you @BCchemomum looks the same

Arrived home late from work to my postie at my door at 7.30pm, poor guy, delivering a Toast parcel.
The re-ordered white shirt is better, the collar is still a tiny bit askew but not noticeably so. But when I tried it on again I wondered if the style (not the fabric) is a little stiff for me. I’m not really a smart collared shirt kind of gal. I’ve been looking to fill a gap since my beloved collarless white shirt that is 8 years old (not from Toast) started to fall apart. But this is a different kind of shirt. I put the old one on to confirm it is a better style on me and was shocked to find it very tight, having still been an ok fit in the summer 😱 Menopause is changing my body at a rate that I cannot comprehend and it is making me feel so rubbish.
I should have stopped at that point but tried on everything else I had ordered (placed a very feeling down in the dumps, need to cheer myself up order with the shirt). Alpaca tank in grey is lovely but just does not suit me. Plus the shoulder was at least an inch wider on one side, which was quite noticeable. Taro white shirt is way too long for my height and the neckline choked me. Macro gingham shirt was shapeless in L, the M in the shop fit everywhere but was tight on the bust. New navy wool cashmere crew neck did nothing for me, made my bust look enormous and the sleeves were too long. Tried the graph check trousers in a different size and I’m still not sure about the pleats at the front, they may make me look enormous and very short, but by that point I was feeling so shite about myself I couldn’t tell.
I hate that I feel so upset by my body, I know it doesn’t say anything about my worth, and it feels vain, but I am really struggling with how it looks in most clothes these days.

@ScottishMouse - I'm sorry you are feeling rubbish. I have been feeling particularly dumpty at the moment so can really empathise. I don't think the recent rubbish weather has helped as I've upped the comfort eating.

Sorry to hear you feel like this too @Stoic123. I wish I could blame mine on comfort eating, but I have been careful with food and am going to the gym and it does not make a difference. I would swear some cruel little elves have been shrinking all my clothes at night, there is no other explanation.

@ScottishMouse and @Stoic123 - it sucks, doesn’t it! Basically, once menopausal, eating more than a couple of carrots a day and drinking anything but water piled the weight on for me! (I’m joking, of course, but not by much!)

I have tried reducing my food intake and have rejoined the gym, but for various reasons it’s hard for me to be very active/active for long periods. Plus, I like eating!

Both my DGMs were round little bundles of plumpness after menopause, and I can honestly say they didn’t appear to give a monkeys! Nobody ever told them they were fat and they didn’t feel it- that’s just the way it was back then. Sadly, genes will tell - certainly in my case 😹 and I look back sadly to the days of my lost tiny waistline and my 34b chest🙀. I also think it’s harder nowadays with more pressure to lose weight, as we know about the health risks, plus we, of course, want to continue to look our best.

For me what is helping is:

Going to the gym - it’s not having much effect physically but I feel better anyway
Taking care of my skin and enjoying skincare and makeup
Wearing nice clothes, (obviously I am giving that a miss in December due to my Xmas jumper fetish 😹)
Thinking about colours and fabrics more
Not caring what others think of my appearance/clothing choices, (see Xmas jumpers above!)

I am sure you look fabulous as always @ScottishMouse and you too @Stoic123 as indeed, are we all 💐

Good advice @IlovePond - and, as you'll know from the advent thread, I have £100s worth of fancy skincare (and some cheery baubles) to help me get through this.

@ScottishMouse - my house eleves particularly like to tamper with trouser waistlines.

@ScottishMouse, I agree menopause does weird things to the body. I felt like that last year and was so fed up. At the start of this year, around the time I started my job, I decided I needed to seriously consider my long-term health.

I came to the conclusion that it just isn't possible to eat the same kinds of things as I used to.

I cut down massively on saturated fat, carbs, and alcohol, pretty much cut out UPF and sugar, and increased my exercise.

It took about 9 months, but I finally plateaued at 7 stone 10 after being 9 1/2 stone this time last year. The 1/2 stone on top of the 9 was after having Covid and not being active for several weeks. I decided from the start that this would be a long-term lifestyle change. It really is possible, I've tried to lose weight before, but this time, it took more drastic action.

I still have some clothes (trousers) that are too big and in a big pile ready for me to get rid of.

And also bought quite a lot of new clothes. I'm aiming for a no buy year next year.

So sorry to hear, that must be really hard for you. How long have you been suffering from it?

Thanks all for the kind words. I try to remember that we change as we get older and I was never going to be able to hang onto the size 8 body of my 20s and 30s, but some days I hate what is happening and the little control I feel over it.
Good tips @IlovePond and @Netcam , I am trying most of these things but I really need to make a bigger effort in 2025. It’s not always easy to fit the gym in around work & kids when my OH travels a lot. Plus I am suffering so much physically with menopause despite hrt that I often just can’t go. And food can be tricky when you have fussy kids and don’t want to make two different meals every time. I need to have a bit of a rethink though as I need to do more.
I like to wear nice things and care less what others think of my clothes choices, but what frustrates me is that I feel my options are becoming so much more limited - I can do longer wear non-elasticated waists, jeans, pleats on the waists of trousers, fitted tops, many buttoned shirts, and so on. And don’t even get me started on menopausal foot problems and the limiting of shoe options.

Anyhow, onwards and upwards. I have woken up feeling like my body has been run over by a truck (my new normal), but will get up and drink some tea, do some yoga, have a hot shower, and brave trying on a couple of things from my order again in the daylight (well, semi-daylight), and if they don’t work, just pack them up and swing by the post office on my way to work and not give them another thought.

Oh@ScottishMouse

Sorry you are having a rough time
If it's OK to ask are you Peri or post Meno?
Just my thoughts but I felt utterly ghastly, piled on weight/fluid and was a wreck during Peri but have settled nicely post Meno.

In fact I feel better now than when I were a young lass
Things that helped
Gave up alcohol
Reduced carbs
Reduced sugar
No gym
Walk/cycle/ swim
Weights
Water
Protein-I cannot emphasise this enough to stop you feeling hungry and stop the carbs/hungry/bloating cycle
Look at your stress levels , this is a massive issue for women, stop giving so much and focus on yourself
Cortisol is an issue and stress ties in with that-ditto no gym
Sleep -I literally made this my number 1 priority
I found that one type of HRT gave me too much oestrogen and I was filled with fluid and very weepy, might be worth checking out.
Have you had a well woman check?
My GP did one, full screening of cardiac bloods, BP, diabetes etc

Hopefully this might be temporary and a phase you will move through
Best of all I just stopped letting people take so much and took myself back

I appreciate the "how has menopause harmed you" chat, I really do. It's the biggest reason I don't post on the thread much- I just don't feel like myself in the way I used to.
For many years I was teetering between a size 12 to 14, in the past 18 months or so it has been more like 14 to 16, and sometimes actually a 16. . It has badly crushed my confidence in myself and although I still buy from Toast , I rarely feel good when I look in the mirror . I eat pretty well and I exercise but the weight stays pretty much the same.

However - I am still looking forward to the sale, surely there's something out there to suit me!!! 😅

@ScottishMouse, I understand how that must be difficult. I have found it much easier to consider myself again now my kids are older, with one at 6th form and one at uni.

I stopped going to the gym in fact and invested in a really good rebounder and some small weights at home. I find that easier than having to go to the gym and now exercise most mornings before work.

We don't cook separate dinners, I just have some of the 'protein' part and a big pile of veg. The others have less veg than me and also some carbs. And even though we have things like biscuits in the house for the others I just don't eat them.

I'm actually the slimmest I've been in my adult life. I think I was more like 8 to 8 1/2 stone in my 20s and 30s and size 10/12, now I'm size 8/10 and 7 stone 10. I think the food changes have had more impact on my weight than the exercise.

Big love to all the other (peri)menopause’s here, it really is tough. I am still peri @Poplinskirt and hope that I may feel better once I am through to the other side, but it has been 8 years of it, it feels never bloody ending.
Stress is definitely a factor for me, although it is mostly due to family issues that are not going to end anytime soon. I had a period of therapy last year to deal with some of it and I think I felt physically better during that time. It might be time to revisit that.
@AFingerofFudge i can so relate to this. I think it is why I seem to be in a constant shopping & returning cycle. Nothing suits or fits anymore. But I am also looking forward to the sale and hoping for something that works. Or maybe just a blanket!

@ScottishMouse it's tough isn't it?

I echo @Netcam as life is definitely easier with older kids. Both mine at uni now, I live alone and I have tried to prioritise rest / sleep and some exercise.

Have never been to a gym but try and do 20-30 mins of weights every other day at home.

I had a full hysterectomy about 9 years ago which was brilliant but now I've hit early 50s, I never quite know how I'm going to feel when I wake up. Sometimes it's hard to get out of bed (although I have a busy full time job so that takes its toll) and I'm starting to feel older!

I don't drink anymore either. I know I need to cut back on sugar but I love chocolate so much .......