Party wear

[MiddleAgedDread]

been shopping tonight and I could cry!! What on earth is appropriate for a birthday party of a colleague? Milestone birthday in a function room of a slightly glitzy bar. I’m late 40’s and a size 12 but don’t really have anything to wear. Can’t wear work dresses because it’s with work people. Everything in the shops is stupidly big sleeves or a shed load of sequins which just isn’t my style! The only dress I liked was £279 so didn’t make it to the changing rooms and looking at it on the website I’m not even sure I like it that much www.johnlewis.com/lauren-ralph-lauren-kishra-floral-dress-black-multi/p112313079

I hear you on the sleeves. Could you do nicer-than-usual trousers and a silk blouse?

Have you looked online? JDW have something similar. It's works people, not got something in your wardrobe? It's not a date.

Velvet jacket and whatever you like.

‘Birthday party’ doesn’t have to mean a frilly frock.

I don’t have any nice trousers or a velvet jacket!! I’m the sort of person who has a nicer pair of trackies rather than the ones I wear around the house 🤣 I had a browse online but there’s so much stuff to wade through. Been in M&S, John Lewis, next and H&M where I lost the will to live and bought a bottle of wine on the way home.

Going on a date was easier!!

These two pieces?

& Other Stories

Or

a Wyse skirt

and little cashmere jumper. (I like the gold skirt but it’s more than you want to spend.)

I didn’t suppose you already possessed a velvet jacket, @MiddleAgedDread. But if you did, you’d find getting dressed to go out much easier …

@IWantedThereThereButItsGone I'm not buying something I’m unlikely to wear again!

These are so not my style at all I’m afraid!

Can you give us an idea of the sort of thing you'd like to wear? Is there anything you can see yourself in?

<Sigh>

You asked What on earth is appropriate for a birthday party of a colleague?

Well, frankly, not something you’re unlikely to wear again. But, y’know, you have agency. And limitless choice. So choose something you think you’d enjoy wearing to other vaguely dressy events for the next two or three years, at least.

Building a smart and workable wardrobe is pretty much the entire point of middle age …

I don’t really know, this is the problem! I’d just like a “nice dress” that’s dressy enough to have made an effort but not so fancy that I couldn’t go out for dinner in it again. I wear a lot of shirt dresses with opaque tights and ankle boots to work and dark jeans or skinny jeans at weekend if I need to be smarter than sports kit.

I'm not planning to buy anything new for Christmas but, if I were, I'd probably go for this Oliver Bonas skirt. I saw it today and thought, 'Right if I need an emergency party outfit, this is it.'
[[https://www.oliverbonas.com/fashion/silver-metallic-midi-skirt-372461#selection.color=26473

It's not as silver as that in real life, it's more like a pewter grey with a nice sheen. (At least that's how I remember it.) Unlike most of the satin slip skirts I've seen, this has got a bit of movement and (although I didn't try it on) it doesn't look like it would cling.

I've no idea if it's your style or not op but it's very dress up or down and you could just wear it with a plain T shirt or a black jumper if you wanted. It would also have a life beyond Christmas, in my opinion.

That's my only contribution I'm afraid. I don't know what else is out there as I've not really looked.

This is a shirt dress but a bit fancier.

www.next.co.uk/style/ls445685/e75519#e75519

I would look at Fat Face they’ve got new collection in.
I completely understand the dilemma. I skipped an event a few weeks ago exactly for this reason. It’s literally to pay at least 150 (all together) for something to wear once.

Oliver Bonas is a good shout. If you’d do a jumpsuit they had a couple that could be dressed up or down and worn again. Also a couple of dresses that were quite nice.

Personally, I’d avoid velvet. The And Other Stories pieces linked to above look lovely but I’ve seen them in person and sadly they are horrible shiny fabric. To get nice velvet nowadays you have to pay much more to get a silk or even a cotton velvet that used to be commonplace and without that horrible shine.

Anything suit at Closet or Finery? Sometimes have good dress options in nice cuts and not very expensive.

Finally, please come back and tell us what you get. I always regret not getting ‘ closure’ on these things 😀

@MiddleAgedDread Why don’t you try hiring? I’ve decided to do this n the run up to Christmas because I’ve got a series of black tie/ formal/drinks parties (mostly work related) . It’s saved me from slogging around the shops and it can be much cheaper than buying an outfit you won’t wear again. I’ve used Selfridges, Hurr and By Rotation.
The only downside is that you might need to complete a successful (low cost) hire to access the higher end stuff.
www.hurrcollective.com/listings/amelle-velvet-lurex-gown

Your dark jeans and a nice top?

https://www.stories.com/en_gbp/clothing/blouses-shirts/blouses/product.jacquard-peplum-top-black.1256688001.html

https://www.stories.com/en_gbp/clothing/tops/tops-t-shirts/product.puff-sleeve-velvet-top-yellow.1194391004.html

If you have jeans, how about jeans and a shirt? Sezanne do some beautiful shirts ranging from the very simple to quite frilly, lacy, patterned etc.

This dress is lovely and a bargain

www.zara.com/uk/en/midi-dress-p00858464.html?v1=406850615&v2=2420896

Something like this? https://religionclothing.com/products/luminosity-velvet-floral-midi-dress?variant=47865729351959&currency=GBP&utm_medium=product_sync&utm_source=google&utm_content=sag_organic&utm_campaign=sag_organic&campaignid=21685014949&adgroupid=166710878306&network=g&device=m&gad_source=1&gclid=Cj0KCQiAoae5BhCNARIsADVLzZdiNnqgseXj0fAk5jgPNGZ4ceymM5ftOg6FFCTKizQoXxH0VHWC1iIaArEXEALw_wcB

Damn, I didn’t go in Zara because it all looked very grey from outside!! I like that colour, it suits me.

....or this? https://www.karenmillen.com/floral-georgette-maxi-shirt-dress-/BKK22016-191-20.html?gad_source=1&gclid=Cj0KCQiAoae5BhCNARIsADVLzZeHEbK2Ihh5BqV-o2NbUXD9MTve6c5MhOJD5Sw4-TuzZb89fD1cZKkaArmHEALw_wcB&gclsrc=aw.ds

not with those sleeves!!

My perimenopausal waistline really doesn’t need peplum tops!
will look at fat face, that’s more my style but they’d closed by the time I got there tonight.