Saw myself on home security cameras- need help with fashion makeover

[FrumpyMcFrumpFace]

We’ve just put some new cameras up that look down our front path and driveway. I was reviewing the clips earlier and saw myself going out . I was dismayed at how frumpy I looked. My mum is staying for a few days, she’s 78, and I actually thought it was her first of all, and had to do a double take.
I’m mid fifties, size 14, 5 ft 6. My whole wardrobe is Seasalt or White Stuff. I’m rurally based and no longer work, so I don’t need work clothes, just a few outfits to go out for a meal etc.

please could I have your suggestions for some fashionable outfits or fashion brands that I might not have come across.
I’m getting my hair restyled this week, so I’m totally up for a rethink.

Can you describe how you look frumpy? Is it poor fit, too much pattern, wrong silhouette?

A good hair cut will def make a difference.

Get your colours done and have a fashion consultation at the same time. transformational.

Thanks for posting this - saved me the job. 52 same height etc and just seen video of me entering the house.
Looking very menopausal.
I haven't gone down seasalt route all m n s ,
Going for a walk to get on a bit of a shape up. Hope some replies when I return.
I have seen some Sahara clothes which are nice but not me.

I've experienced that... I assumed I strode about purposefully whilst it appears I'm doddering about in search of a Zimmer frame or a shopping trolley.

i feel like I’ve been wearing the same sort of clothes for a decade. Lots of comfy or flowery dresses. We were ironically on our way into town where we ended up in Seasalt, and my mum was picking out outfits for me. I was screaming inside, and I hadn’t even seen the clip at this point!

So many compelling reasons not to get a ring bell.

Are you sure your mother looks frumpy?

Anyway - I would never usually say this but perhaps this might be an apposite moment to consider your clothing size. If you’re not as active as you previously were there’s a danger your weight could creep up and up …

As regards casual clothes, have you looked at:

Community Clothing

American Vintage

and, for slightly dressier wear:

Cos

They’re all really mainstream, but with a more contemporary, less cosy vibe than the brands you’ve mentioned.

If you feel you look frumpy, try moving up a level in smartness

Instead of looking to revamp your whole look, go through your wardrobe and try and make outfits - top to toe. Think about shapes and colours that go together, try on combos you're not sure about, it might be shit but it might give you an idea about what is " missing " from your wardrobe

Look at Instagram, Pinterest, fashion mags etc. See what you like. No need to splurge on what someone else's idea of fashion is, clothes are fun, it's OK to make mistakes.

That made me laugh so much. We have a Ring doorbell and see myself on a daily basis...it aint pretty.

I recycled all my fleeces at the beginning of the year as I had read they were unflattering. I bought what I thought was a nice black cardigan just for when it was cold and on the first wearing GS said
Ah I see you are sporting the granny look.
No actually thought I wasn't. But that's the problem I am lost too.

I took up aqua pilates about a year ago, it's really improved my posture and core strength, I walk upright, straight back, shoulders back and with more purpose now, I think that makes a world of difference to how you look. I know the feeling of catching yourself on the CCTV 🤦‍♂️

How well does your bra fit? A decent fitting bra could make a big difference.

Do you have a John Lewis near you? They do a free personal styling service, it’s great I’ve used it loads.

It’s worth trying to find some ideas of the kind of styles you’d like to try on Pinterest or Instagram or just have an idea in mind of the kind of look you’d like to have, but it’s not essential - you can say you want a few outfits you can wear for meals out etc and they’ll pull some ideas together.

I find patterned clothes aging really. Maybe try swapping any ‘tops’ for a light camisole & loose linen shirt over the top. You can pair this with a comfy pair of washed blue jeans. Oh and a great pair of trainers - white converse look good with most things on most people!

Maybe try swapping any ‘tops’ for a light camisole & loose linen shirt over the top.

Do real people wear this combination? I thought it was an ITV advert trope - signifying ‘housewife’. Not even SAHM - just 1970s standard fit housewife.

It’s true that the wrong print (all too easily sourced) can make one look lost in a previous century - a t shirt in the current shape looks more contemporary. Or a plain shirt, again cut to contemporary proportions. (That is, assuming you don’t want a tight cropped top that shows your midriff?)

I’ve something similar. I’m a 14 and 5.8 and honestly I look really fat on the security cameras. I know it’s not the camera, as my husband and other folks look like they do.

pissed me right off 😂

Probably not a popular opinion but Seasalt is always frumpy ime. Unless you don't mind this, avoid!

🤫🤫🤫@Nothingeverything …

Do you want to be hunted down and terminated?

This has made me laugh, I am on crutches currently and quite relieved that the physio decided against a zimmer frame 😀

you usually can’t go wrong with well fitting jeans, and a white shirt , or cowl neck tops/ jumpers are really flattering . Some nice sandals / wedges maybe from fitflop, all easy to wear but make you feel more polished

https://www.roman.co.uk/cowl-neck-bardot-jumpsuit-14111508

this Roman jumpsuit looks so nice and is comfy on, (mum has it) works with trainers for day or sandals for night

I'm a tall size 14 in my late 30s and Seasalt makes me look frumpy. It's not you, it's something about the way they cut their clothes.

I would suggest finding stuff with some shape to it. Defined shoulders and a waist do it for me, might be something different for you. The only way to find out is to have a day on your own in a big shopping area with lots of shops (not your local high street with just Next and M&S) and try on a load of stuff you wouldn't normally wear.

Also as others have said make sure you've got a really well fitting bra. If there's an independent shop near you with a slightly intimidating older lady doing the fittings then go there because she almost certainly knows what she's doing, if not then John Lewis.

the other thing to bear in mind, is that being seen from a different angle is always disconcerting. Have a look at your style choices etc, but it might just be shocking to view yourself from a vantage you have never experienced before. I think posture is quite important, maybe more so than clothes choices.

I saw myself in photos recently and was horrified! I’d let my hair go naturally grey during lockdown and always have a decent cut and had loads of compliments about my grey hair. However! When I saw these photos of me I looked like someone’s granny and not the age I am. As soon as the hairdresser opened I rang and booked myself in for a colour and highlights! It’s taken 10 years off me and I’m so pleased I did it.

Jeans and white shirt, sure, if the op can wear white, but wedges, fit flops and cowl necks are really dated