Underwear and Wedding outfit if overweight - just want to cry

[WeddingNight]

I’ve been unwell for a while and gained a lot of weight. My normal is 160lbs and I’m currently 190lbs. I’m 5 foot 8 and 25yo usually wear anywhere between a 14 and an 18 but usually 14 on the bottom and 16 on the top. I’m getting married next month and just want to call it all off.

I hate the way I look and don’t feel happy in anything. Now I’m feeling better I’m obviously making changes to my routine to help me lose weight but it won’t be fast enough for the wedding.

I was thinking some flattering, slightly special underwear may help (nothing OTT, no extra holes or anything) but have no idea where to look. Current bras are 32HH and fit quite well but are plain.

Additionally any advice for dresses? I’m not going for traditional and was considering something like this… https://www.phase-eight.com/product/julissa-ruffle-wrap-midi-dress-22180560008.html. Maybe in the green..
Budget of £500 ish. I’d do anything to feel slightly better

Sorry to hear you have been poorly. You are not huge for your height - you just need to find the right outfit. I am not convinced that dress is it though - I don’t feel it’s particularly flattering on that slim model and the sleeves are a tricky length I think.

How about having a session with a personal stylist? Maybe google some near you (or a large shopping centre near you) and find a couple you like? I think after being so poorly, it's a great investment to make sure you feel great on your special day (and beyond).

Are you prepared to go full length: I think this would look lovely with your figure and height.

https://www.stacees.co.uk/products/sheath-column-v-neck-sleeveless-long-floor-length-chiffon-bridesmaid-dresses-with-pleated-split-S10235697BTBB?color=Teal&gad_source=1&gbraid=0AAAAABZ07IP23mX65Iax-Ed2j8TKAArRU&gclid=CjwKCAiAi6uvBhADEiwAWiyRdiPRjZzyVoLy2XemTqekU7TASunwGaYsLkMXkh-oEEXpyGAvNBCzDhoCYoIQAvD_BwE

I meant in the teal. Not sure why it shows a different colour.

I am so sorry you feel rubbish!! It is tough. I put on 2 stone with steroids 3.5 years ago and haven't managed to taper off them yet so just feel big and no underwear works even if I find a dress that somehow looks nice on mid size influencers.
Would definitely recommend going out and trying things on to work out what looks best. Maybe a nice department store like John Lewis?
I like the look of the dress you shared, with big boobs a v neck is most flattering but depending on your shape a wrap dress can be a bit awkward and not sit right.
I am sure your fiance thinks you look amazing anyway and congratulations on your impending wedding!

Go to Bravissimo to get some lovely underwear!

'Foundations' shops often do bridal ranges that are quite nice.

Thanks @BoilingHotand50something
I feel very large, this is an outfit I wore recently (it’s pretty much the same dress I think - potentially even the same one). I have tried to stay anonymous but worried someone will recognise the photo regardless. My face cheeks, chin etc are the worst bit about me but that will take months to change

@JadeVS72 Sorry to hear you’ve also been unwell. John Lewis is a good idea, I’m worried about going and feeling worse about myself.

I pretty much always wear wrap dressed but I’m probably naive and they look bad.

The dress looks great on you!

That’s a really good ideas @Notthegodofsmallthings I feel quite vulnerable doing that but maybe I need to just put my big girl pants on! Worried they will say there’s nothing that suits me

I have no advice......but your skin is just beautiful and looks great with that colour.

Thank you @35965a I suppose I could re-wear a dress I have (the one in the previous picture).
This is a type of dress I wore in the past, unfortunately it no longer fits and the style no longer flatters me

Oh thank you so much @PersisFord
Maybe it is more of a mindset thing.. or maybe I need to stick with a dress I have. I wanted a new outfit (that I could wear again) but it’s causing a lot of stress. Hence thinking well fitting underwear may help with the search

From the recent pic you shared I think you need a better bra to lift your boobs a bit and give you more of a waist. I suggest going to somewhere like Bravissimo and trying lots of different bras until you find the shape/style that works for you at the moment - that will make a big difference to how you look & feel in clothes. Don't worry about whether it is 'bridal' or not, just focus on getting the right style/shape.

Then go to somewhere like John Lewis personal shopper and try on lots of different style dresses. I think when you change shape quite a bit it's hard to know what suits you so trying lots of different styles you wouldn't normally go for will give you a better idea of finding something that suits you.

I think you’re spot on @reallyneedwinerightnow and articulated what I was trying to say
So Bravissimo is the place to go for a flattering bra? I’ll have a look for the closest one

I think you look lovely but I find any dress with a tie at the side or front adds bulk to the line so I think hou could find something better. Great colour on you though.

M and S has a wear your own bra shaping slip. You could wear something like that for the day and buy something pretty for your wedding night .

If you’re in London, I’d recommend Rigby and Peller. Wrap dresses can work, but I think you need a better bra to lift your boobs up, so that it doesn’t look like they are sitting on your waist. I often find that wrap dresses are cut too short in the waist and there’s not enough space between the boobs and the tie. Go for something that gives you a more defined waist (even if you feel you haven’t got one). Have a look at the John Lewis website to give you some ideas.

I would agree with getting fitted with a great bra to start with. Do you have a trusted friend you could go shopping with? The personal shopper idea is a good one but I know that can feel daunting.

You look lovely in the photo OP! My suggestion is you do something nice for yourself like get your nails done or whatever you enjoy as a treat and remember to enjoy this time, you are getting married and thats wonderful! Depending on where you live,
I've maybe go somewhere and try on a load of dresses. If you want online, ASOS is good for up to date dresses and I've bought from there curve range and rate them.

Trust me, they won't, and will have worked with people of all ages and sizes and all fears. If you can afford it, it will be worth it. I think MM Personal Styling videos on Youtube are also really great and I have learned a lot from them, and they are free.

I think you have fabulous legs and could go for a shorter length. You've also got a great bust (and great busts need great bras) and as previous poster noted, lovely skin - you've got a lot of great stuff going on and the right dress will make you feel a million dollars. If it doesn't it's not the right dress.

Are you in reach of a Rigby & Peller? Decent bra, and a tea length more structured dress would look fab. I love the colour of your dress. Good luck!

I can see from the first picture that you have fabulous ankles, so I would show them off. So a dress in this shape
https://www.jjshouse.com/a-line-v-neck-asymmetrical-chiffon-bridesmaid-dress-with-pleated-007251600-g251600?currency=GBP&utm_term=251600&utm_size=10&country=GB&country=GB&currency=GBP&ggntk=x&ggkey=&ggtgt=7&ggplm=&gad_source=1&gclid=EAIaIQobChMI-4Xhv-PlhAMV_UBBAh2hggKuEAQYDyABEgLxEfD_BwE

I find any dress with a tie at the side or front adds bulk to the line I agree.

Oh OP I can totally sympathise with why you feel the way you do. You are not the same woman you were in the past. But you are still beautiful and still worthy of looking and feeling amazing on your wedding day.

Similar to what others have suggested, a well fitting and supportive bra, along with some shape wear will probably give you what you're looking for.

I was a similar size to you when I got married and I hated it because I had also put on weight. But I got a great dress that flattered my figure and felt amazing on the day. You will look back on your wedding photos and wonder why you were worried.

Have a look at https://www.elomilingerie.com/uk/en/ for bras and matching knickers. They cater for larger cup sizes and have lots of different styles and finishes.