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Original poster

Is this dress too white for a wedding guest?

164 replies

NewbieSM · 24/10/2023 07:25

Hello all, I'm attending a good friend's wedding in couple of months and have purchased this dress as an option for the big day. For context the wedding is in Australia at a beach location so not super formal in dress code and a lot of the other guests will be wearing similar styles, so please no comments about it being too risqué for a wedding. Aussie weddings tend to be less traditional than British ones and slip dresses are commonly worn. My concern is that there is a lot of white on this dress so not sure if appropriate and I do not want to offend the bride. I would ask her but I'm friends with her fiancé and don't know her very well.

www.johansenofficial.com/collections/dresses/products/lilou-dress-hibiscus-print-blue?variant=44110010155230

OP posts:
SylvieLaufeydottir · 24/10/2023 08:02

I think it's fine, but then I think the views expressed on here on this topic are utterly bizarre. Especially the ones about how the bride must be "the only splash of white in the photos". Since when was the point of a wedding the production of a set of photos and not an actual, in-person celebration with family and friends? Not to mention, if that were actually true you'd do better to ban all pale colours, not all dresses with white as a background.

The etiquette rule is that you shouldn't wear a dress in which you might be mistaken for the bride. That's all. This is fine.

LolaSmiles · 24/10/2023 08:03

Same here Paltrypam. One of my guests wore a beautiful cream two piece and she looked stunning.
Nobody struggled to work out who the bride was, even in a simple and low key wedding dress. To be blunt, my friends and family aren't idiots.

Paltrypam · 24/10/2023 08:04

The etiquette rule is that you shouldn't wear a dress in which you might be mistaken for the bride. That's all. This is fine.

I didn’t even have that rule. I trusted all my guests to know that I was the bride!

DisforDarkChocolate · 24/10/2023 08:05

I agree @SylvieLaufeydottir.

Give it a couple of hours and they'll be links to Phase Eight outfits aimed at the mature market no matter what type of wedding it is or how old the OP is.

Peckahminn11 · 24/10/2023 08:08

This is fine OP. I wore something similar to my friends wedding day

Everley · 24/10/2023 08:09

I think the dress is perfect for the type of wedding you’ve described.

I didn’t give a fig about what guests wore to my wedding, I just wanted them to be happy and comfortable. I trusted that no one else would have turned up in a wedding dress!

ActDottie · 24/10/2023 08:11

It’s fine but if you’re really worried run it past your friend

Paltrypam · 24/10/2023 08:11

ActDottie · 24/10/2023 08:11

It’s fine but if you’re really worried run it past your friend

No

Original poster
NewbieSM · 24/10/2023 08:14

Haha the pearl clutching about the cut of this dress is peak Mumsnet. My mistake for posting this question on a British forum, as I know court shoes and fascinators are common wedding attire in the UK. Sorry I don't want to pretend I'm attending a royal event wearing a hat that looks like a turd and a matching tweed jacket like my grandmother Confused

Thank you to the posters who had constructive advice on the colour, like I said I'll find out the bridesmaids colour scheme and then decide. Honestly I think the bride will like the style of the dress as I can see she has worn similar to a different wedding in a different colour and she looked fabulous.

OP posts:
disappearingfish · 24/10/2023 08:15

30 is definitely not past it. It's a joy to wear a dress you feel good in so if it does that for you - great!

NImumconfused · 24/10/2023 08:17

For an Australian wedding I'd have no issue with the colour/pattern/style, but it doesn't look like a decent quality dress for that price - the back drapes badly and in the pic from the back the seams are all wrinkled. Also, if you're 5"2, will it not be about a foot too long??

PrinceHaz · 24/10/2023 08:18

Will it not drown you - as you’re 5 ft 2? It’s ok but for the money, there might be nicer dresses.

Paltrypam · 24/10/2023 08:19

NewbieSM · 24/10/2023 08:14

Haha the pearl clutching about the cut of this dress is peak Mumsnet. My mistake for posting this question on a British forum, as I know court shoes and fascinators are common wedding attire in the UK. Sorry I don't want to pretend I'm attending a royal event wearing a hat that looks like a turd and a matching tweed jacket like my grandmother Confused

Thank you to the posters who had constructive advice on the colour, like I said I'll find out the bridesmaids colour scheme and then decide. Honestly I think the bride will like the style of the dress as I can see she has worn similar to a different wedding in a different colour and she looked fabulous.

One poster mentioned the cut 😐

ittakes2 · 24/10/2023 08:19

sorry I wouldn't - the white will stand out more on a white australian sandy beach and it will look like you are trying to upstage the bride
also though look closely at the material - particularly at the photos of the back its so crumpled I am not sure the material is very good quality. I tend to think if you are going to sell a dress make an effort to have it looked ironed and if you can't there is a quality control issue.

DeadbeatYoda · 24/10/2023 08:21

A dress that low cut is rarely flattering, maybe a little too attention-grabbing for a daytime do. Each to their own though.

IamfeelingSad · 24/10/2023 08:25

NewbieSM · 24/10/2023 08:14

Haha the pearl clutching about the cut of this dress is peak Mumsnet. My mistake for posting this question on a British forum, as I know court shoes and fascinators are common wedding attire in the UK. Sorry I don't want to pretend I'm attending a royal event wearing a hat that looks like a turd and a matching tweed jacket like my grandmother Confused

Thank you to the posters who had constructive advice on the colour, like I said I'll find out the bridesmaids colour scheme and then decide. Honestly I think the bride will like the style of the dress as I can see she has worn similar to a different wedding in a different colour and she looked fabulous.

I'm Australian but my kids are English....a bit disappointing AND embarrassing as a fellow Australian that you post on a mostly English website and then attack the English because you get some posts you don't agree with! I hope everyone realises that not all Australians are this rude.

BeyondMyWits · 24/10/2023 08:29

When I got married I did not notice who wore what, other than my stepmum who wore coral pink (to try and upstage my mum, not me...) she stood out like a sore thumb in the photos, so she wasn't in many.

From that I just learned, don't stand out too much, the dress will be fine.

Original poster
NewbieSM · 24/10/2023 08:30

Oh and yes I will have to have it taken up as I'm short but my mum is very good on the sewing machine so can do that no problem and the straps are adjustable to there won't be any unfortunate nip slips and I would also use boob tape. I think I'm going to just ask the bride when I see her on the weekend she and my friend are coming over for dinner with some other mates and she is lovely. Her's is the only opinion that really matters as it's her big day, I won't mind if she says she doesn't like it or thinks it's too white, I want her to be happy and obviously don't want to detract any attention from her

OP posts:
GunboatDiplomacy · 24/10/2023 08:32

Blimey, Australians eh! Not too white though. and spaghetti straps are very easy to adjust so it sits at the right height on your bust and bum, although if you're much shorter in the body than the model then the back may still be a problem.

To follow down a PP's rabbit hole, my theory is that perfect wedding photos have become increasingly important the further we get from the advent of widespread photography as we realise that great great great aunt Ethel is long dead and forgotten, and the key memory we have of her is the photo of her wedding in a family album, and great grandma Maud's terrible hat. We've found out the hard way that the wedding photo will survive long after the day itself is forgotten.

MintJulia · 24/10/2023 08:32

Uhm, you're friends with the groom and plan to go to his wedding in that dress. Are you trying to show him what he's missing?

The bride may not mind but don't be surprised if the MOB takes offence.

Loopytiles · 24/10/2023 08:32

Not at all bridal, it’s fine.

AMuser · 24/10/2023 08:33

This isn’t a white dress. At all. Enjoy the day. Oh to be at an Aussie beach wedding!

Nishky32 · 24/10/2023 08:34

IamfeelingSad · 24/10/2023 08:25

I'm Australian but my kids are English....a bit disappointing AND embarrassing as a fellow Australian that you post on a mostly English website and then attack the English because you get some posts you don't agree with! I hope everyone realises that not all Australians are this rude.

Show quote history

Good to know!

Janieforever · 24/10/2023 08:34

The dress is totally fine.

people are going too far. Not wearing white is one thing, not wearing anything that even has a bit of white background is just going far too far.

its fine, im sure you will look lovely. Crack on.

W0tnow · 24/10/2023 08:39

I'm Australian. It's perfectly fine. We're nowhere near as twitchy about wearing anything with white to a wedding. The only thing I would say is that taking up something on the bias cut can be tricky and end up not looking quite right.