Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Style and beauty

Looking for style advice? Chat all about it here. For the latest discounts on fashion and beauty, sign up for Mumsnet Moneysaver emails.

Help please! Turned into a frump!

330 replies

cheeseisthebest · 30/10/2021 16:49

Hi. I'm 43, bit overweight and short and I hate my clothes!
Never know what looks nice on me? Please help! I wear a lot of black, navy, grey or I have very patterned dresses from White Stuff.
I just don't know where to look or what would flatter me?

OP posts:
Thread gallery
51
liveforsummer · 31/10/2021 11:08

I'd ditch all the fitted tips, that fine knit jumper is ok for the office but definitely not for casual wear. I'm a year younger than you and loving all the over size, drop shoulders and chunky knits and jumper dresses. Far more interesting than the long straight cardis you've shown. As a pp said you can use belts and tuck jumpers and t shirts in to the front of jeans to look more flattering. Looks like you are on the right track with some chunky short boots and trainers. Look at SHEIN for some ideas.

Lookingoutside · 31/10/2021 11:17

Forget White Stuff.

How about a form fitting sweater dress with tights and boots?

StiltonIsLife · 31/10/2021 11:19

I also wanted to encourage to give blazers a go instead of a cardigan. There are so many different types, more casual ones , but they give structure. But easy to dress up / down

www.hush-uk.com/saskia-checked-blazer-brown-black-ecru/003695-0456.html?searchPhrase=saskia

www.joules.com/Women/Clothing/Agatha/Jersey-Blazer?size=10&id=213885|NAVY|10

www.bravissimo.com/products/textured-jersey-blazer-pc179/#midnight-pc179mng

PumpkinSpiceGirl · 31/10/2021 11:21

I find with H&M it very much depends on the branch - most you wouldn’t want to go into with a naked flame and are really depressing to search through but there’s one local to me which just seems better organised and where I nearly always find something.

Also agree that the right shoes/boots/trainers can really lift an outfit and the wrong ones can ruin it. I’d say a plain pair of white trainers (or maybe darker as we’re coming up to winter) and pair of chunky boots (I’ve got burgundy fake DMs and black biker boots) would make a big difference.

MildRose · 31/10/2021 11:32

Inspired by this thread, having bought no clothes for fecking ages and feeling a massive frump wearing mens jumpers and baggy jeans all the time, I've ordered a couple of dresses, a jacket and some leather trainers today. Hope I can drag myself back into something remotely stylish Smile

user1469544430 · 31/10/2021 11:38

Someone on mumsnet recommended taking some time to go through 'the concept wardrobe' website: it does colours, style essences and kibbe. Really helped me realise what i like and what suits me! The kibbe stuff is useful up to a point and lots of useful youtube videos.

Oblomov21 · 31/10/2021 12:07

Watching with interest. I feel very out of sorts recently.

DFOD · 31/10/2021 12:11

@user1469544430

Someone on mumsnet recommended taking some time to go through 'the concept wardrobe' website: it does colours, style essences and kibbe. Really helped me realise what i like and what suits me! The kibbe stuff is useful up to a point and lots of useful youtube videos.
Can you post a link please?

If it’s to the Thread one above - it will only let me look at menswear

madmumofteens · 31/10/2021 12:16

theconceptwardrobe.com/product/the-wardrobe-guide

elysianpavements · 31/10/2021 12:49

There's some great advice on this thread. I agree with the posters who suggest shopping your own wardrobe as a first step. Take a look at what you've got, see if there are different ways of putting things together and layering them. Experimenting can be fun. I'd try your blue dress with a bright-coloured belt or ribbon around the waist, or maybe with a huge brooch on the shoulder, with a cropped cardigan or jumper, with knee-high boots, or peeking out from a trenchcoat. Using Dylon on neglected items can give them a new lease of life and is great for experimenting with colour.

Then add in two or three new pieces that will make new outfits with each other and with what you've got already - stripey top and Chelsea boots have been sensible suggestions here. I'm another one who agrees a soft blazer or jacket can really make a casual outfit shine. Jersey, tweed, a tuxedo, a shacket - they all give a totally different put--together look that's wearable and confident. Other items that can change or upgrade a look for me are: a white shirt, a necklace, a belt, boots, a hat. We're coming to the season when your clothes will mostly been seen glimpsed under a coat - so knitwear in strong colours, which will look good with a winter scarf over the top, is a useful buy. Personally I'd stay away from patterned jersey dresses unless you love them, as they're rarely flattering. Patterns in general make it harder to look good, and if you're on a budget you'll want to repeat wear clothes often - patterns are less versatile and make it more obvious you're wearing the same thing again and again. Plain colours look more harmonious, and can be combined in more ways. BUT enjoyment of what you're wearing should be the top criteria so feel free to ignore this advice! Remember just because others find something a staple doesn't mean you have to wear their uniform. I never wear jeans, for example. We live in a time when there are a lot of things out there to try and you can have fun experimenting to find what's right for you. Clothes are fun.

Get used to your new outfits for a while, start to try on more stuff and you'll begin to work out what you like and what works for you. Don't buy anything unless it makes you smile when you look in the mirror.

I like the Uniqlo merino jumper, though I think the pale blue looks a bit wishy-washy. I have a couple of colours of the crew-neck version. Great as an extra layer, looks good under a jacket, over a shirt, with skirt or trousers, even dressed up with a long multi-strand necklace (not sure this would work with a v-neck though), and maybe with a scarf. My favourite jumpers come from Uniqlo and Cos. You can often find nice M&S cashmere on e-bay at good prices.

I find an easy pick-me-up is lipstick. A bright or dark colour immediately makes your appearance and outfit look bolder and smarter - people look at you and assume your whole outfit is a confident statement rather than a few things you've chucked on in a hurry.

lifestooshortandsoami · 31/10/2021 12:49

@cheeseisthebest thanks for posting this as am feeling exactly the same and got to the point where I’ve got a mixture of clothes I don’t like, one I like but don’t fit and not a clue where to go from here.
I’ve got some of the mom jeans from m and s and they fit really well (am only 4 ft 11 so get the short and they’re perfect). I found an outfit I really liked in summer was the mom jeans, Birkenstock’s and a plain t shirt… was a bit like a uniform as I just put different jewellery with it and didn’t have to think about it.
I’m struggling now it’s autumn/ winter as just want to wear what I’ve been wearing ha. Trying to find some boots that will look ok with the mom jeans and this thread is really helping me too.
One of my current problems is new pup is putting holes in every item of clothing I wear so I tend to wear jeans and a hoody that and now bothered about it when in home but then look a complete scruff if pop out to the shop without getting changed Grin

gcgirlsrock · 31/10/2021 13:20

Never wear flats - it looks frumpy. Wedge or kitten heels when you are out in the evenings.
Heeled boots with pointed toe length legs abd asd height.
Cashmere - wools - linen in the summer looks classic. White company do some Amazing options for our age bracket.
Anthropology for something special
JL for basics
Start dressing in a more sexy way for the evening - really go for it - blow dry - and be adventurous!!

HundredMilesAnHour · 31/10/2021 13:37

Never wear flats - it looks frumpy.

This is so not true. Nothing dates you more than wearing heels right now so flats are most definitely not frumpy.

RemusLupinsBiggestGroupie · 31/10/2021 13:39

Never wear flats. It looks frumpy.
Utter bollocks

NalPolishRemover · 31/10/2021 13:40

Totally agree that flats are not frumpy - they are the way to go! (Though probably not ballet shoes)

cheeseisthebest · 31/10/2021 14:07

Some dresses I've already got thar I like

Help please! Turned into a frump!
Help please! Turned into a frump!
Help please! Turned into a frump!
OP posts:
cheeseisthebest · 31/10/2021 14:09

This ins

Help please! Turned into a frump!
OP posts:
cheeseisthebest · 31/10/2021 14:10

Last one. Thinking I could update these with black tights and ankle boots?

Help please! Turned into a frump!
OP posts:
holidaynearlyover · 31/10/2021 14:12

@cheeseisthebest

Last one. Thinking I could update these with black tights and ankle boots?
Yes that would look great with boots
cheeseisthebest · 31/10/2021 14:20

Wearing this today with these boots.
Fitted navy dress with v neck. Black scarf and I love this coat. Its not a good photo but feel quite well put together today. Out for a lunch at a hotel.

Help please! Turned into a frump!
Help please! Turned into a frump!
OP posts:
liveforsummer · 31/10/2021 14:20

Yes you could definitely update those with a scarf, tights or leggings, new boots or even a pair of your knee high ones as well. You could try out a belt with the denim and jumper dresses too

liveforsummer · 31/10/2021 14:21

Cross post, you've already tried out the long boots

RemusLupinsBiggestGroupie · 31/10/2021 14:27

Glad you found an outfit that makes you feel good. It looks nice.

I think the striped dresses probably need to go away until next Spring/summer but the others will work well with tights and boots.

Swipe left for the next trending thread