My grey hair just doesn't suit me!

[jesusmaryjosephandtheweedonkey]

Been growing out my grey for 20 months.
It game through white first , now it's more patchy steel grey and darker bits at the back.
I wanted to embrace it and love it but it just doesn't suit me!
Looking for light brown hair dye recommendations please.

Mine didn't suit me either! I looked awful. MIL has let hers go grey after being blonde for years and I hate it on her though I'd NEVER say that.

It just makes her look old...we can't all be super stylish with grey hair.

I don't have any recommendations sorry but I always just buy the most expensive one I can.

Whilst I'm a great proponent of grey hair, it doesn't suit everyone. I'm really a proponent of choice, if you don't like it, don't do it! It really isn't for everyone, no need to feel bad that it hasn't worked out, you gave it a go.

Honestly? If you're going to dye it again, I think a salon is the only way to go, lots of home-dyes look flat or don't take very well on grey hair.

Not everyone can afford a salon visit ShrikeAttack. I certainly can't so thanks for the assertion that my hair looks flat.

I agree that a salon colour will look much better. They can also advise on the best colour/shade to use.

Olia is good.

Lots of people put in salon colours themselves. Its not necessarily more expensive than a box colour and it doesn't have to be done in a salon.

I recommend eSalon products. Great service and the colour last longer on me than the standard box ones

Personally, despite the 'let it go grey' lockdown trend, I think that very few women look good with grey hair.
If you don't like it then go back to colouring and if going to the salon is too expensive then maybe find a local 'wfh' hairdresser, which tend to be much cheaper. This is what I do and she is fab.

I’ve been growing mine out for about seven months and now I’m having a wobble. I am grey at the front but still much darker at the back. I can’t see myself continuing and I think I will get foils at my local salon in lots of lighter brown colours.

Try Josh Wood colours

Mine doesn't suit me either, I'm so sad! I have very dark hair so had visions of the contrast of dark brown and white looking very chic, but in reality it just makes all my hair look mousy. I'm also barely grey at the back but very grey at the front, so it does look a bit odd.

I've started using a semi-permanent, just to blend the greys in a bit, but I think I'll go back to the salon and maybe get foils with dark and some highlights to blend in the greys better.

I plan to try again in 10 years when I'll be 50 and hopefully a lot more grey!

Thanks for the recommendations everyone.
I'm just so disappointed that it doesn't suit me and look fabulous 😩
Feel I wasted my time growing it out.
I had very dark hair almost black. So I think I will go for a light brown and see if that looks ok

@expatmigrant

Personally, despite the 'let it go grey' lockdown trend, I think that very few women look good with grey hair. If you don't like it then go back to colouring and if going to the salon is too expensive then maybe find a local 'wfh' hairdresser, which tend to be much cheaper. This is what I do and she is fab.

Whilst of course everyone should be free to choose the colour of their hair, and everyone has different colouring, I do question opinions like this which say that very few women look good with grey hair. It is an entirely natural thing which pretty much all women have when they get older, in the same way that men do. Surely this isn’t about nature getting it wrong, we don’t say that very few men look good with grey hair. I really believe it is social conditioning that makes us believe that women don’t look good with grey hair, but men look like silver foxes. I’m not telling op to keep her grey hair, you should do what you like, but I really wish that we could move past the view that a natural hair colour doesn’t suit most women. It probably very much does, we’re just trained to rail against it with all of our anti aging stuff

The other thing is course is the shock factor/ most women colour their hair for years so when they grow it out it takes only a year or so and the shock is real. Whereas men let theirs go naturally and so the gradual process of greying, lets the eye adjust.

@IDontThinkSoNo I completely agree. Everyone should do what they like with their hair but the idea that grey hair suits women less than men is just social conditioning.

I use medium golden brown Clariol and I’m happy with it. I used to get the colour done one a year and then pay £45 for roots every month. For the last 17 months I’ve done it all myself and it looks the same.
My hair looks a bit lighter than the lady on the box.

This is my hair, I’m 52.

I’ll never embrace grey, I’m another one of those who thinks people just look younger with dyed hair

[quote mocktail]@IDontThinkSoNo I completely agree. Everyone should do what they like with their hair but the idea that grey hair suits women less than men is just social conditioning.[/quote]
While I agree that different standards are applied to men, which is totally, unfair, I disagree that grey hair suits all women. It depends on the individual woman's complexion and how their hair goes grey. Not all women grey at the same rate either. I have a relative who has a fine head of dark brown hair aged 58; with literally two grey hairs among it. I also have a super stylish relative with a dark olive complexion who died her light hair grey in her late 30s because it really suited her, and now she is older, she has lovely naturally pretty grey hair that is all one colour. Whereas I have a pale complexion which is prone to redness, and my hair naturally is an unflattering mix of brown white and grey like a shaving brush. It doesn't suit me at all.

Sorry, I meant to add there that I don't think it is all social conditioning (although that definitely exists) I really think some grey hair suits some women better than others depending on their complexion and shade of grey.

I think it depends on eye colour as well.

I really believe it is social conditioning that makes us believe that women don’t look good with grey hair, but men look like silver foxes.

The other thing is that men go bald so having a full head of hair at the age at which they start turning grey is seen as a positive. Noone calls a bald man a silver fox, it's just those who aren't bald.

I think that for many people having grey hair is a bit like having very short hair. For it to look good you need to make a real effort with makeup, get a great cut and dress well. The combined signals of messy hair, no make up and a dog walking fleece don't look good. When I have had my hair very short i need to get it cut a lot more often - 4 weekly - and always wear some makeup and jewellery just to avoid looking as if I don't care. With my present longish blondish hair i still make an effort but it certainly looks better on the days I don't want to.

I've been dying my greys since I was 18 and I usually use a full hair dye 6 monthly and touch up the roots monthly.
My greys come through by week 2. It doesn't matter how much you pay for the dye, if your hair grows quickly the grey will show before you can re dye it.
I stay brown because of my complexion but have you thought about dying your hair silver?

@ExConstance

I think that for many people having grey hair is a bit like having very short hair. For it to look good you need to make a real effort with makeup, get a great cut and dress well. The combined signals of messy hair, no make up and a dog walking fleece don't look good. When I have had my hair very short i need to get it cut a lot more often - 4 weekly - and always wear some makeup and jewellery just to avoid looking as if I don't care. With my present longish blondish hair i still make an effort but it certainly looks better on the days I don't want to.

I have grey hair and totally agree with this. I make a lot of effort with clothes, make up etc. As I really fear looking dishevelled or like I’ve let myself go. I find it’s a lot harder to be casual and low maintenance looking with grey hair. But, again, I think that’s because our eyes are trained (due to media, anti aging products, and the factt that most women colour their hair) to see grey hair as letting oneself go. I really think if hair dye has never been invented, or wasn’t used so widely, we wouldn’t feel this way.