What's it like to be beautiful?

[mclover]

Just that really. Idly looking through some online gossip pages (I know) and seen a pic of David Beckham for example, and Helena Christensen. What's it like to go through life being very attractive? Any beauties out there want to share?

Yes, it is interesting. The idea of women being jealous of other women who are beautiful... I mean, obviously I wouldn't know from the perspective of the beautiful one, but I do struggle with accepting that we're all nasty, jealous bitches. A lot of people who have commented on this thread have said they have friends who are very pretty so presumably they have got over it enough to befriend them! I know school can be awful but the ugly kids have a bad time because of their looks too. There doesn't really seem to be a way to win, does there?

I guess I do have jealous feelings towards people who have been blessed with such good fortune in the looks department but I try hard not to show it. I know it's not fair and they can't exactly help it. It's just that you grow up seeing beauty equated with goodness through tropes in children's books about beautiful princesses and ugly old crones and handsome princes, and by the time you get to adulthood, you see people being rewarded for being good looking in ways that us plain or ugly types can never hope to attain. It is a fact that attractive people do better at job interviews, which is frustrating when I look back on some of the interviews I've had where I didn't get a job I really wanted and was qualified to do, and I wonder if it would have been different if the interviewer had fancied me! Reading some of the stories on this thread have been genuinely gobsmacking for me, as I can't imagine strangers going out of their way to help me if I was stuck at an airport or my car had broken down. It seems like the very beautiful occupy a completely different, helpful world!

Every time I meet women, they look me up and down with that pursed lips expression, roll their eyes at me as soon as I talk, etc etc. Sadly I've come to expect it now and I don't always have the energy to get them to like me. It's exhausting. Plus what kind of person judges so quickly based on appearances, I'm glad I never do. I don't need such shallow nasty people in my life.
I have problems at the moment from the women that live on my street, except one, who is lovely and is now a friend. The others like to watch me, loudly comment on my clothing, they've filmed me putting the rubbish out on bin day in my dressing gown, quite openly holding up their cameras. They've driven into the back of my parked car, shouted abuse at me, physically attacked me. I've had to call the police a number of times, one of whom was a bit creepy, which I just brushed off.

I complained about a couple of teachers at my dc primary school leering at me every time I went to pick up and drop my children off, the female teachers at the school then started a campaign of hate, pointing at me in the playground, it was suggested that it was my fault because I'm flirty with male staff - I definitely am not. Nothing was done about the teachers, instead the school decided to make it a safe guarding issue against me and SS became involved. Luckily they decided that there is nothing wrong with my parenting. That is what happens if I complain about the behaviour of men. It becomes all about me.

I think life is easier if you're averagely pretty. The extremes make life difficult. If you're pretty in the girl next door way, slightly plump, etc., you,k find it easy to make friends and men will be friendly but not pervy

Not all women are nasty, there is the odd gem that is lovely and non judgemental, secure in herself and doesn't judge on appearances.

Professionally I was an academic, and looks definitely didn't help in that area

NC for this.

I've been called beautiful and stunning by both men and women. Professionally, I am an academic and it certainly hasn't hindered my career. I have had the odd email from smitten students (male I assume) but that's probably as far as the negatives go.

I do find that it is women that I notice looking me up and down when I enter a room. Far more so than men.

Overall, I like it and I'm happy to make the most of it while it lasts.

@ScreamingValenta I agree, it seems like regardless of a woman's attractiveness there's always some men who feel a need to let her know exactly what their opinion of her looks is for some reason!

Between my mid-teens and early 30s I've ranged from having a really lovely slim body to being pretty overweight (same face obviously!) When I was slim I definitely got some unwanted attention from sleazy guys, and when I was overweight I've had men I don't know lean out of car windows to shout that I'm a fat bitch. I'm pretty happy to blend in and not be noticed generally to be honest!

Also I have never flirted to get some benefit though I have seen many other women (not beautiful or really sexy) flirt to further themselves get what they want.
I had one senior woman try to destroy my career which was definitely down to jealousy. I have always preferred male bosses because if they were horrible it was in a straight forward way and they were like that with everyone. Women were a whole different category.
I have always female friends so I am not saying all women are like that but there is a proportion who are.

Well for one thing one person beautiful is another's person's average. Plus there is a difference between pretty, sexy & beautiful. I think prettiness ages more and someone who's beautiful can still be beautiful in their 80s.

I used to do some child modelling & was a photogenic child, my parents kept me quite removed from it though & the emphasis was always on studying, playing sports etc. I started proper modelling in my teens & although I knew facially I was ok I felt very lanky & awkward in my body. I was too undisciplined at modelling (waifs were in) & moved away from it but ended up in other areas of fashion. As a teen I never had a problem making female friends & hardly any boys asked me out!
I've worked in places that are 90% women & I never recognise the "women hate pretty women". Many of my friends are beautiful & I love them.

For me the main pluses are people are generally just nice to you & it's easier to get your way/help whether that's directions, discounts, a job offer etc.

Re male attention I'm not sure how much of that depends on your looks. Obviously someone with a cracking figure in a revealing outfit will turn heads but I think some men will try it on with anyone. The men that pay me attention are definitely not my type but I've never particularly got hassled.

I'm sure some women may have mistrusted me or given me a dirty look but generally I found women are really friendly to me too & have never had a issue making friends.

I don't think people are necessarily nice to you because they fancy you it's because if you're beautiful,people do assume you're a good, kind person.

Also if women are jealous of other women than beautiful & very successful women such as Kate Moss wouldn't have so many female friends.

I have found that as an attractive fat woman, people find you offensive for not being thoroughly ashamed of yourself and staying indoors. They struggle to accept they might find a fat person attractive and react with name calling and being aggressive.

They are the same arseholes who judge beautiful women on their looks alone and probably react aggressively if turned down.

It’s such a shame that so many beautiful women have had to live their lives dressing to avoid confrontation or jealousy.

In one of my first jobs, I worked with a woman who was very beautiful who had blatantly been hired because the man who did the interviews fancied her. She was a lovely, kind person but badly out of her depth and mostly reliant on getting the men in the team to help her out, i.e. finish her work or correct the mistakes she made. The hiring manager was very defensive of her (I suppose he didn't want anyone to start questioning why he'd taken her on) so there was no recourse there. I don't know how she felt about it really - perhaps she was so used to having people (men) rush to do things for her that she didn't know what it was like to be any other way.

On one occasion, she mentioned that her car had been making funny noises on the journey to work. Within five minutes, practically every man in the building was outside in the car park, gathered around her car, staring manfully under the open bonnet and trying to make "ah yes, it's the fan belt" facial expressions. It was pretty funny really. Do these men realise how obvious they're being?

I'm not pretty. In fact I am downright ugly. But I don't hate, or feel intimidated or treat badly beautiful women. I just wish that I was them and am sad that I am not.

I'm not attractive and I notice that life is much easier for my attractive friends in some ways - job opportunities, even people serving them coffee being much nice.

However, some of them get stalked and harassed and they often seem to attract boyfriends who just want them short-term for their looks.

Past a certain age though (which I am long past!) it seems to even out and their advantages fade.

My sister is STUNNING. Everywhere she goes she will get attention. I would say I am pretty but not stunning like her. I get some attention but nothing like her. She has a few friends who are very jealous of her sometimes do not include her on nights on and things but she is the nicest person I know.

She doesn't realise how stunning she is she is quite shy and uncomfortable when people approach her.

One issue my DD has is that she has a lot of male friends (she’s 14) and quite often one of them will ask her out. She says she finds it very disappointing as she thought they were her friend who liked her for her personality rather than her looks. A very close friend (since they were 7) recently told her that he loved her, she tried to just carry on like before but he wouldn’t stop asking her to be his girlfriend so she avoids him now. She’s very upset to have lost him as a friend as now he’s just “being weird” apparently
I know she still young but it must be difficult when someone you have been friends with for a while suddenly tries to change the basis of your relationship.

The ugliest people in our society get the hardest time ime.
This^.
I'm sorry but all if this "oh I'm beautiful so people don't think I have a bran when really I'm a neurosurgeon" is a bit irritating.

You can prove quite easily that you are also clever, and then you are the beautiful woman who surprises everyone by being a neurosurgeon. Boo hoo.
The world is much, much crueller to the overweight, oddly shaped and unnatractive.
And as for men bring creepy or hassling you-yes, it's gross when you are a young girl and they follow you down the street, but it's equally insulting when men treat you with barely disguised contempt because they don't want to fuck you.
There are shallow twats the world over but at least being beautiful does give advantages.

Yes, but this thread isn't about ugly people. Its about beautiful people.

Yes Trewser. Well done. It's about what it's like to be beautiful. And my conclusion is : It's not as bad as being ugly.

She says she finds it very disappointing as she thought they were her friend who liked her for her personality rather than her looks.

Good looks, nice personality, high intelligence etc. are not mutually exclusive.

Perhaps they did asked her out for her personality.

ASK her out

When I was younger I was beautiful even as a child. I was the odd one out in the family blonde curls and skin that tanned easily etc rest of my family dark frizzy hair and weight issues, my mother dressed me different than my sisters all the frilly dresses and the hair styles while my sisters dressed as they pleased I had to look like a little doll to my mother I think, I grew up with people regularly stopping my parents in the street to comment on my face and things and shower me with compliments on how I looked, my auntie and mams friend would love to watch me for my mother and spoilt me rotten and often offered to take just me to places, My father was the only adult in my life who treated me the same as my siblings and all the other children, I think all adults treated me different than all the other children even my teachers, while I very little I loved the attention strangers give me and yes I had all the confidence in the world far more than my sisters and friends but as I grew up and become a teenager I hated it I was always just the pretty girl while other children got praised or complimented on actually what mattered they talents and accomplishments and such I was a very talented artist and only my father and art teacher pushed me with this, my friends and my own sisters were jealous if ever I just talked to boys they liked or they boyfriends, as I grew up into a women it become the norm to me that friends got jealous and women in my life women who didn't know me were often quite cold towards me especially when men were present, then when I had my own relationships the jealous boyfriends were a big thing and I become very nervous talking to other men, the people constantly stopping me to compliment me caused huge problems in my relationships, It give me huge advantages as a child with confidence but it also give me plenty of disadvantages as I became older, my looks are starting to fade now and women have never been so friendly with me, but I certainly learnt from it as I have 3 DD's now and they are all beautiful but I don't make it all about the way they look, my DD2 is so similar to how I looked when I was younger and she gets the same from family, friends and strangers as I did but I step in and I treat all my DD's the same

Beauty "standards" vary round the world, I've found. Here at home, I am distinctly "ordinary". I'm pretty enough, and I'm ugly enough. There's no stand out features here, and even less so, now that I've reached the wonderful, invisible age of 50. The only person who notices me is my husband, which is the way I want it. However, in my 20s I spend a little time in the far east, and something about me seemed to attract every weirdo on the block. I was told by a friend that it was my round shaped, green eyes, chestnut brown hair and freckles. I didn't have any awful experiences, just some very odd ones. I was waiting for a bus one day and a man stood in front of me, singing to me. I've still no idea what was going on, but I've never been so glad to see a bus in my life. There wasn't a hint of threat but boy, was it odd. If that's a smidgen of what beautiful women put up with during their gorgeous years, I'll stick with being plain, thank you very much!

I wasn't a stunner but I was very pretty when younger. In all honesty it made me constantly suspicious any time any man talked to me.

On quite a few occasions they would be nice and friendly and it would transpire it's because they wanted more. On one especially embrassing occasion, a man I'd been on slightly friendly terms (quick chat over the coffee machine type of thing) at work, got drunk at a work party and sat on front of everyone sobbing because I was moving away. I could have died of shame.

At a boyfriend's friend's wedding the groom grabbed my arse on the dancefloor and slurred something about always thinking I was a pretty. I cringed and hoped no one had bloody spotted him. I also walked off and we left the event soon after.

My neighbours when I was ayounger were a young married couple and after inviting them round for a party he tied to kiss me in the kitchen. She saw (also saw me shove him away, thank god) and they split up soon after that.

Ex boyfriends would tell me their friends fancied me.

It was tiring and it just made me on guard everytime a man would talk to me. Worrying about whether or not they were going to try it on, if they were with a wife/girlf then always making a point to take directly to her and be friendly so she wouldn't think I was a threat, taking ultra care never to appear too friendly to him just in case.

I am now older, fatter, hardly wear makeup and live in jeans etc. I have to say, hand on heart, life is a lot more relaxed this way. Now if a man talks to me, I am free not to assume anything and just enjoy the chat.

They probably did ohsopretty but to her 14year old brain it’s a “betrayal”. I think the disappointment is when boys she’s known for a long time start acting in a similar way to the older boys at her school ( who don’t know her so aren’t asking her out for her lovely personality) when she saw her friends as “safe”

Last time all you beauties I am not beautiful at all and I have had very similar experiences with men and never not got a job and people are kind and helpful it's not cos your beautiful it's because you are female and because lots of people are actually nice and kind.