Royal style & gossip: make every day Tiara Tuesday!

[QueenOfTheAndals]

Previous thread

And I shouldn't have to say this anymore but will do so for any newbies - let's keep our critiquing to the clothes and not the women wearing them.

I know someone who threw her own shower, complete with gift list. And then she repeated it for baby number 2!

I agree that the U.K. doesn't have the same tradition of baby showers that the US does and it's considered a very American thing. But then I'm not sure what Americans would think of the British tradition of hen dos, which seem to have gone from a night out with your friends to expensive overseas trips!

It’s very, very, very unusual for a mum not to attend her daughter’s baby shower in the States.

That can often depend on where the mother lives. I know several women who did not fly across the country for what essentially amounted to a 3-hour party.

It is definitely not the done thing in the US to host your own shower. In fact, in the South where I live, even close family members do not host. It should always be friends.

@QueenOfTheAndals

I was thinking the same!

We think Baby Showers are tacky

But Americans are very conservative about drinking and probably think a standard British Hen is tacky as fuck

I was talking to an American who said that average and normal drinking behaviours here would be considered alcoholism by any standard there

Horses for courses

Beyonce has put an acceptance speech and a shout out to Meghan on her Instagram:

"beyonce
Thank you to the Brits for the award for Best International Group. I won this award back in 2002 with my besties, Kelly and Michelle. How lucky am I to have been in a group with my other best friend, the GOAT Hova. 🙌🏾 In honor of Black History Month, we bow down to one of our Melanated Monas. Congrats on your pregnancy! We wish you so much joy."

She never usually does lengthy captions! I love Bey's suit (and Jay-Z's for that matter. A springtime vision).

I’m not criticising MM, btw. Well, yes I am, but she’s only doing what comes naturally.

@BartonHollow - I meant, she’s American. They like to have baby showers. They don’t see it as “me me me”, because done properly, baby showers are thrown by friends and/or family FOR someone. They’re meant to be a way for the mother’s nearest and dearest to show their excitement about the baby’s arrival. The focus is on the birth of the baby and the making of a mother (a special, unique thing, probably based on some bible-based notion of the importance of this idea of womanhood). It’s not about the fabulousness of the expectant mum, in it’s origins. So, she’s doing what comes naturally, and in her mind it’s not about her (exclusively), although that’s the way it comes across to Brits.

Goat Hova?

GOAT is Greatest Of All Time. Hova....No idea!

Oh I just looked it up:

"The song's lyrics "H to the izz-O, V to the izz-A" use the -izzle language code to spell out HOVA, which refers to a pseudonym given to himself ("Jayhova") for his self-proclaimed status as the god of MCs, a reference to Jehovah.".

Mindblowing. All the years I have sung along to that.

It’s also very common in the US to have a few baby showers and yes they are thrown in honour of the Mother-to-be, she doesn’t host them. It’s possible for example that your workmates might throw you one during a lunch hour at work and then a best friend might host one for your girlfriends and then a family member might have one for close family and friends. So it’s not unheard of that you have a shower that your mom did not attend, most likely because she was going to another. When I had my babies in the USA I was thrown three showers for my first and two for each of my others for these reasons. Sometimes if you just had one shower it could be really huge! It depends a lot on how big your extended family is. My husband’s large family in California always wanted to throw me a shower but we live in another state for example.

It’s just a big excuse to have fun and take pleasure and joy in someone you love or know well celebrating a wonderful event in their life. One of mine was thrown by my friend who had it as a brunch in her sunny backyard so we could bring our toddlers and babies as many of us were on our 2nd, 3rd or 4th.

Meghan’s theme seems to be “wealthy and wannabes” friends of the bride! Explaining her mom’s absence. It definitely seems to have been thrown with at least a few people’s careers in mind to give them publicity, as it could’ve easily been extremely discreet and unknown to the world if they chose. You get the impression it was thrown by her best friend from Canada with input from the mother-to-be. I actually have been very neutral toward Meghan and felt she’s been unfairly hounded for just being married into Royalty as Catherine was also highly criticized for years (along with Diana and Fergie before her). However I have to say all the rigmarole in Manhattan has made me much more cynical. This could have easily happened with zero publicity.

The royals of course have always had the ability to do the same but have been careful to stay under the radar. If this keeps up I do think the confusion between celebrity and royalty will encourage republicanism. People will clearly realize we are funding a few people’s lavish lifestyle for no apparent good reason.

LOL at that ridiculous DM article. Do they have anyone editing?

Half way down they showed photos of random people who were just checking in to the hotel, some carrying BAGS! Accompanied by much speculation of course.

Though they did point out that Harry spent a small fortune on a private plane to ferry him home from Norway for Valentine's Day...

It is quite amusing to see the MN reaction to that most benign of events, the American baby shower. There are elements that appear to greatly offend British sensibilities while the basic impulse of generosity and celebration behind the phenomenon and the cultural context of community support seem to be completely lost in translation.

Love that look on Camilla. She looks great

"If this keeps up I do think the confusion between celebrity and royalty will encourage republicanism. "

In which case she would be my favourite royal of all time.

Cor blimey I did manage to write an essay there! I guess I was neutral to Meghan and was not offended by her, but the latest stuff does definitely put her more in the category of her life previous to the royal family and would be totally expected of a very successful actress. She didn’t have that lifestyle before her wedding to this extent however, so it gives the impression that she is now living her showbiz dreams.

I don’t think she can really understood how the royals fit in British life however, and how could she? In America they are presented as just another celeb with fab lifestyles and of course Diana was the most photographed women in the world when Meg was a teenager. Unfortunately the biggest difference is that British Royalty involves OPM (Other People’s Money). No one cares if your money is earned by you and spent by you but once there is a possibility that you are having the time of your life with the help of OPM people don’t feel quite the same! The Royals have been good at quietly glossing over the OPM and trying their best to look like they have earned it in some fashion, so Anne and Her Madj have been earnest and dutiful. Meg is doing what they are all doing but because she is “one of us” (with better shoes) she is ripping the curtain from the Wizard of Oz. She is really being scapegoated by the DM as clearly many of the royals (especially the men with their massively expensive shoots) spend $$$$$$$$ on a regular basis “just for fun”.

Back to clothes and shoes!

Oops meant to say “not offended by her behaviour”.

Yeah mathanxiety the strangest thing is when people were calling a baby shower “vulgar”. Is it vulgar to bring your friend or sister a gift after she has had a baby? Well in the states they just give it to you before the baby is born, often around the time you are going on maternity leave at a baby shower.

I don’t think the baby shower was vulgar but excessive displays of wealth by self acclaimed humanitarians is. Her money, her choice.

In other Meghan news, the Mail is going to love her for this!
https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/meghan-markle-wants-tackle-discrimination-14013503

It is quite amusing to see the MN reaction to that most benign of events, the American baby shower.

To me, it seems strange because her mum’s not there. To have a baby shower without your mum (unless there is some toxic relationship), is pretty unthinkable. Maybe they’ll quietly do a second with Doria, but it’s just so unusual by American standards that I’m left wondering if this is really just a promotional event for her friends or something and that’s why Doria didn’t go.

Are you American, Pineapple?

Did we see Harry closing his own car door?. Obviously that woman's influence. This is not the royal way.

If that’s just a baby shower, then as Ida says yes she has compromised the meek and dutiful image the royals like in order to hide the OPM problem. They’re not philanthropists or environmentalists, any of them, they don’t give a toss and sadly I’m including MM in that too, not sure why I’d hoped for any different Maybe this is how she modernises them, shows them for being absolute hypocrites!

Lol at him closing his own door!

You know who have the best insight into the royals, their protection officers! They’re with them all the time, I wonder what gossip they have :)

I think you can be wealthy and enjoy all the trappings that come with it yet still care about other people and the world, without being a complete hypocrite. It's a fine line though (looking at you, William, telling the plebs to stop having children while you pop out 3...)

I've been in hospital for a couple of days so missed most of the baby shower hoo-ha, but what it's done for me is really highlight how much money some people have and what a different world they live in. I think that's why they come across as so entitled because they're used to living a certain life and anything different must feel like too much of a compromise. What annoys me is how we get moaned at by the council about putting the wrong type of plastic into recycling but there are people who will use a private jet to fly home across an ocean from a completely unnecessary party. It's a funny old world we live in sorry if I'm being grumpy it's either the painkillers or I'm turning into my mother

Back to Meghan and I think she needs to be very careful about how she's perceived at the moment (not just 'she' but the people around her, advisors etc) so as an example, if her friends had arranged to come here and throw her a baby shower I don't think there would have been the same amount of criticism. Equally, I'm sure even stateside they could have been more discreet about the whole thing. I feel like I'm waffling so I'll shut up now, but I do feel sorry for MM as whatever she does is going to be wrong in some peoples eyes, I'm just a bit surprised that she isn't being guided a bit better by the powers that be "Oi, Harry, have a word with the Mrs there's a good lad...."

PineapplePower we just don’t know what Meghan’s private plans are. I wouldn’t be surprised at all if her mum is planning to come out and stay with her before the birth, and in that case maybe they have other family plans. I have definitely attended baby showers when the mother of the mum to be was not present because she had more than one shower for different groups of family and friends. For all we know Meg may already have had a discreet shower with her mum and others. It seems everyone is assuming all of the DM reporting is the full story. What about if Doria has other plans or thought it wasn’t her thing as it was just her girlfriends?

The other funny idea to me is that when you go to NY you should easily be able to see your friends and family in California! Never mind that it’s at least a 5 hour flight away and across a number of time zones, it’s like flying to Paris and wondering why your friends in Moscow aren’t popping round for a cup of tea.

Maybe her mum is anti baby showers.