One month to totally overhaul myself - unlimited time and budget?

[Lattesforlife]

Okay, so the unlimited budget isn’t true at all really, but I am interested in your suggestions regardless just in case I win the lottery!

I have exactly 1 month till I see my ex again. I feel battered after the last 6 months and I want to transform myself in to the confident kick ass lady I was before.

I’m currently approaching 38, 2 stone over weight, my skin is dull, spotty and full of chin hairs..... I have zero energy because I’ve been so consumed by the break up. I am self employed but in a quiet period, so have time to spend on myself (Ds allowing!)

What would you do? I guess I’m after a mini princessing routine of things that will make a difference in 4 weeks?

My thoughts so far are:

Some sort of diet that nourishes me / my skin / hair?

Drink water..... gallons of the stuff

Eyebrows threaded and dyed

Exercise routine of some sort?

Poss lip fillers?

Skin care routine is currently sleeping in my make up then washing it off with soap

This is what I would personally realistically expect for myself in a month (but it's very individual).

Nails done, definitely. If bitten then they can apply nail extensions to get the length back.

Hair cut and colour.

A new lipstick. A fairly bold (but not gaudy) one.

Johnson's Clean and Clear range (daily exfoliating scrub and the moisturiser) are great at brightening and clearing up spotty skin, they are cheap and I feel they are pretty gentle on my skin for what they are.

Have an evening plucking all the stray facial hairs with the help of a bright light and a magnifying mirror!

Drink more water and take a good multivitamin every day. Perfectil is good. I would probably want to lose weight but would do that by cutting down here and there.

Finally a really great outfit. It doesn't have to be expensive but it must show off something you like about yourself and in a colour that really suits.

Some have been mentioned but my list would be:

1. Keto or atkins diet at 20g of net carbs or less
2. Yes to 30 day shred or 2+ hours work out everyday
3. No Booze
4. As much sleep as you can
5. a hot FWB
6. Whiten teeth
7. Religious skin cleaning, moisturising and weekly masks application.
8. Ditto hair and an amazing hair transformation/cut/colour/straightening
9. Yes to nails

10. New shoes and clothes bought in the 3rd week as I guarantee you will lose weight. 11. Groomed eyebrows and facial hair removal!! 12. Bi weekly massages 13. if you are so inclined, confidence hypno therapy, law of attraction audio book, creative projects to express yourself and feelings. 14. Plan a holiday to look forward on week 5 or 6, even if an overnight getaway.

I do agree though that all this is mostly for your own self. An ex in my opinion would be jealous to see you happy, moved on with someone hotter/better/fitter/younger/richer/more successful although if you also look well then thats a bonus.

If your goal is to feel better I’d throw in some yoga as well, loads of stuff on you tube can be done any time

I would add yoga with Adriene, free on YouTube. The 30 day yoga camp includes affirmations - I am competent, I am worthy - that I’ve honestly found helpful despite it sounding so new age. Give it a try anyway and at worst you’ll tone up a bit!

Great ideas so far. I can just add get some Garden of Wisdom Azeliac acid and vitamin C serum. Makes a massive difference to your skin quickly. From Victoria Health online, it's very reasonably priced. Also the Korean exfoliating clothes on Amazon for your body, cheap and so effective. My skin looks and feels the best it's ever done and I'm 41!

If budget allows it have a skin peel to make you fresher and smoother. Buy an epilating spring from Amazon to sort the pesky chin hairs. All the advice about eyebrows and nails is spot on. Whitening teeth makes you look years younger. Also subtle lash extensions will open your eyes and make you look ‘done’ even if you aren’t.

Have a session with a personal shopper. You're not obliged to buy but it might help you find an outfit which makes you look and feel fabulous.

Spanx.

... but upmost is to get that chin hair removed. That's a necessity. You'll feel a million times better.

A big smile on your face is what you need. As someone else mentioned; the best revenge is to be happy (or at least appear to be )

Sorry I am only just coming back - a family member was taken into hospital today so all my plans for self improvement went in the face of coffee and junk food.

I have some of your suggestions already so going to dig them out - chin spring thingy, Korean clothes and vitamin C cream are hiding in my cupboards already!

Going to be back on it tomorrow with bells on..... because in other news, the other woman who the ex promised he wasn’t with, well, he’s with. So. I need to look and feel extra awesome.

We have a month ladies, #projectfuckyou is underway!

And for all those of you suggestion empowering films and affirmations and a big smile. I love it, thank you. This is an inside and out job, and I’m grateful to you all for getting it. Thank you

Phillip Kingsley Elasticizer for your hair

Definitely definitely eyebrows shaped and tinted

Start Couch to 5k asap. Running is brilliant for weight loss, fitness, mental health and just generally feeling good about yourself.

Second vote for Yoga with Adriene on youtube. Do one of her 30 day programs. She is wonderful and I love her lots and lots. Plus yoga does wonders for your posture and good posture takes stones off you and instantly makes you look better.

drink loads of water
eat loads of fruit and veg
move more (walk / run/ yoga/ whatever. Just make moving part of your everyday life)
like a pp said, take a few minutes out each day and repeat affirmations to yourself (I love and approve of myself etc. Whichever phrase resonates with you).

I’m in supermarket getting supplies..... would coconut oil for my hair work? What else should I buy?!

Yep, coconut oil will make your hair soft and smooth. I use it on my body as well. Maybe a face mask and a nice bath bomb or oil for a proper pamper session?

Another vote for yoga with Adriene on youtube.

I'd always say haircut but you've got that covered. Is there any clothes he hated you wearing? Wear those.

But really, just forget him and do this for yourself. If you eat a healthy diet and start a regular exercise routine do it for you, not him. The best revenge as someone said is to not give a fuck about him.

I really, really want to not give a fuck about him. I feel like whilst this was Driven by him, it’s absolutely for me - mostly because he controlled everything about my appearance before if that makes sense?

By the end he chose all my clothes each day, my hair was dyed a drastic colour, he stopped me going to the gym because he was jealous and he didn’t want me getting my nails / lashes done any more because my beautician texted me once saying she was worried about some bruises I had and asking if i was okay....

I want to reclaim myself! So it’s driven by a fuck You to him, but that’s for me. If that makes sense?!

I got the coconut oil - what do I do with it?! Also got some fake tan, a face mask, a new intensive night moisturiser and a gorgeous red wine coloured nail gel.

TAKE YOUR MAKEUP OFF BEFORE YOU GO TO BED.

Sorry for shouting, but it makes SUCH a difference to skin. Your skin looks like crap right now because you do this, and it's such an easy change to make.

I like cleansing with a flannel or facecloth, as recommended by Sali Hughes and Caroline Hirons (Google it if you want to see videos on it). The Body Shop Camomile Butter destroys absolutely everything, it's gentle, and it's cheap.

Rub the oil between your hands to make it liquid and then work into dry hair by section until it' coated. If you are prone to greasy hair I'd leave it off your roots. Then wrap in a towel or shower cap for as long as you like and then wash out. You can just use it like a body moisturiser on your skin as well. I like it on my feet to soften them up. Sounds like you've had a really tough go of it, well done for being out and finding yourself again!

Get strong through exercise. Pilates classes done regularly do reshape your core and mental attitude very fundamentally. Eat well, regularly, moderately, and drink lots of water. A glass of red wine every few days IS good for you and your state of mind.

Live well; it's the best revenge.

Have a course of Microdermabrasion and drink plenty of water, a smidgeon of highlighter and you'll be glowing x

If your ex is not controlling you any more then live your own best life and just do what makes you happy.

You have nothing to prove to him as he is no longer in your life and no longer has any control over you.

Who cares what he thinks when he next sees you. It just doesn't matter.

Enjoy your life OP

Whatever you wear make sure it is your best colour and not one that is just in fashion. There’s nothing better to make you look great .

If you aren’t sure then take a look at the Keetlewell site and there is a quiz to guide you to your colours.

*Kettlewell

I believe that you doing this to ‘show him’ will be just too obvious. If you don’t give a shit, it will show. Happiness seeps out of every pore, as does desperation.