Fashion rules that don't work for you

[KanyesVest]

As the owner of ample boobs, I look incredibly frumpy in v-necks, not much better in scooped. Boat, crew and slashed necks are much more flattering for me, no matter what every style guide says.

And I love clashing colours. Red looks great with purple and I love the contrast of orange and pink.

I'm looking for new winter looks so please inspire me with your cavalier disregard for Trinny, Gok, et all.

No suggestions for winter looks but I an a very busty hourglass that looks fat in wrap dresses. Pretty much all of the tips for big boobs don't help to flatter my big boobs.

High waisted trousers to hide my mum tum - nope, makes me look pregnant. Low rise is much better.

But V necks are definitely a winner. crew necks are so frumpy on me.

Ha, I came on to this thread to say V neck with boobs

Not a good look on me, must be something to do with head/ boob ratio or summat. High necks look tonnes better.

Boot leg or flared jeans to balance big hips. No! A pair of well fitted straight leg jeans looks much better.

Wrap dresses for an hourglass figure. No! It looks like a dressing gown and puts about a stone on me.

V Necks for big boobs? No! You can see deep into the abyss. Boat, bardot and scoop work for me.

A wide belt for a curvy figure. No! I don't want to look like an egg timer.

Also think horizontal stripes make me look slimmer, not fatter.

I am also big boobed and on the chubby side. Wrap dresses are frumpy on me too and not really flattering.

I have some boat neck Breton tops which I look great in, despite being against the rules in every way!

Bootlegs for wider hips. No, looks awful on me.

Dresses with a just-lower-than-empire-line "waist". Gok always reckons they flatter as they highlight the smallest part of your body. I look pregnant in them.

I look pregnant in them too. I think the waist is stupidly high on most dresses (and I have a short body, so I have no idea how more normally proportioned people wear them).

Halter necks for big boobs. I have a short neck, so they don't work.

Halter necks for big boobs?! I don't think a strapless bra exists in my size for me to ever even attempt strapless.

Bootlegs just look frigging awful. No, they don't 'balance', they widen everything.

Skirts which stop in the knee look skimpy/cheap on everyone. Including the Duchess of Cambridge.

My people

Yes, I fully agree that horizontal stripes can look great. The weight of my boobs is detrimental to my neck health with halter necks. That BBC version of pride and prejudice introduced too many of us to empire lines.

A crisp white shirt. Totally unflattering with a pale complexion and feel like part of a uniform.

Oh I'm with you there, I just don't get the "crisp" white shirt at all

"No! You can see deep into the abyss"

And what is wring with that?

If you've got it flaunt it. Being somewhat under-endowed I don't get the angst from the curvier ladies on here. There aren't any tops that I know of that are flattering on me. I look flat chested in all of them

wrong not wring. D'oh!

High waisted trousers, especially jeans, need to go crawl back under the rock they came from. They flatter no one, not even the svelte gazelles that supposedly can carry off anything look awful. They're especially unkind on the behind. The whole unfinished hems on jeans that are all over the high street now are deeply aggravating too. Sorry, needed to vent...

In terms of fashion rules, I tend to think they're all a bit of nonsense beyond giving general guidelines and you end up looking rather boring and safe rather than fashion savvy if you adhere to them. For every rule I can find an exception given enough time and money. I'm short so palazzo pants are a no-no but I've found plenty that are flattering, denim on denim, etc. Same with the whole getting your colours done, I'm sure it works for a lot of people but I tend to find it rather limited to only view clothes in terms of colour, texture, cut, and material are equally key imo.

Funnily enough a lot of former fashion rules get challenged by designers and then become trends like wearing black and blue together a few years ago, it was a cardinal sin before that. The only fashion rule I stand by and hope never becomes a trend is the matching outfit with your DP/DH/DC/DM.

Oh, I love crisp white shirts. They are my fashion goal. They never sit right on my though (aforementioned boobs) and they never stay white

"High waisted trousers, especially jeans, need to go crawl back under the rock they came from"

No they don't. I find low rise trousers and jeans so uncomfortable. Being pear shaped low rise trousers cut right into me.

"Same with the whole getting your colours done, I'm sure it works for a lot of people"

It certainly works for me. Winter colours really suit me. Other season's colours don't.

"Never ever black and colour"

Sod that my Crimson cashmere jumper and black cashmere trousers ensemble ALWAYS gets a compliment or (positive) comment. God help me if either item gives up the ghost

Spanx type underwear can fuck off. Just like a modern day corset if you ask me. A belt around my waist to create the illusion of a curves? Nope.

Can anyone explain why they say not to wear black and a colour? I just don't see why not.

Bootlegs can sod right off. I'm pear shaped and they're the most unflattering things ever. Even when I was a much younger size 10/12 they looked hideous. Whoever put that tip out there was just having a laugh at ladies with hips

The black with colour thing I think has some truth in it but not always. The theory is that wearing any colour with black isn't well thought through, It's become too easy to wear black trousers or skirt with anything for example. And it can make both items look cheap. So a bright top may look better with navy trousers, or grey, or brown, or burgundy etc etc. It's just about not having black as the only neutral to throw on with just anything. Some colours do look better with grey, navy or brown. I always bear this in mind but sometimes colours look great with black, I just think about it before I put just anything with black.