Looking effortlessly groomed...

[elliej83]

Hi everyone,

I've been a little glum this week as just find no matter how hard I try I always seem to look a bit unkept.

I have very fine hair which is always wispy no matter if I tie it up or have it down. Shorter styles are even worse to keep. I always seem to have bags under my eyes and just look a little unkept.

I was discussing this with a friend today who said that its one of those things you either have or you don't. Or... You spend a fortune to get.

Does anyone have any tips on looking groomed on a budget?

Completely agree with those saying there's no such thing as effortlessly groomed and beautiful, unless you're one of the lucky few that's born a 10/10, it takes a lot of time and money. I don't have a great deal of either I'm afraid.

I maintain my eyebrows at home, by myself. I buy a pack of facial waxing strips for £1 from Bargain Buys, then I cut them to match the shape and size of my eyebrows, wax them and grab any leftover hairs using tweezers. I'll then brush my eyebrow hair upwards and using very small scissors I trim the hair. I do this once every 1 - 2 weeks, takes five minutes and I've had people compliment my eyebrows in the past. Much cheaper than paying £5 - £10 every two weeks.
As far as hair goes, I would recommend spending a bit more on getting a decent haircut. I used to get my haircut at a salon that charged £17 for a dry cut, I decided to treat myself and spent £40 on a haircut at a different salon not too long ago and the difference is amazing. The shape and style is SO much better.

Daisygarden - how do you use the big clips in fine hair? Speaking as someone with fine hair who's fed up with wearing a straggly ponytail! Thanks

There's only one thing that works in under a second, ie what most people would actually do: wear scent.

Squirt and go, everyone loves it.

I wear either florals (can be cheap as hell) or 'colognes' as avail in Jermyn St - they smell very, very expensive but the big bottle works out cheaper than Poundland Brut. Packaging lovely.

For this time of year, my lone clothing hero tip is a good summer coat, not a jacket; swish swish.

For clothes, I would say there are 3 things:

1. a colour palette that suits you
2. styles/shapes that suit you
3. most importantly: what suits your style i.e. what clothes are very you and fit your lifestyle

Lots of very stylish women have a "uniform" that is often their signature style.

Body maintenance is easier than overhaul, and keeping organised makes helps. So, when you go to the hairdresser's/dentist etc. make the next appointment, put tweezers next to the bathroom mirror and so on. Not effortless but it makes it easier and becomes a habit.

I think its all false.you can look exactly as you look you will then look and only then look groomed when you believe it. from the inside your beauty seriously shines.i believe every word people say when they talk about that.the most groomed will look trashy if she has a pout on yet the one smiling next to her with the same look will look glam and glowing.someone with joggers on and no makeup grumpy will look drab the one smiling and bouncy exciting in life next to her wearing the same will look amazing and energising.its inward looking out to glam.its believing in every bit of your beauty no matter what it is.from your toenail?one strand of hair in place today.spot it all and youll feel and look awesome

I often get told i look polished and groomed but therenis nothing effortless about it. I enjoy the pampering self improving chores and see it as me time (even the ironing) so I don't mind it, but it does take effort.

I spend 20-30 min every evening after ds in bed and have a roata ie face mask/pedicure/shaving/hair mask/etc. i dont do it all every night but I always do something.
I look after my skin face ans body
I have nu e feet all year round not just summer, ditto nails.

I would never leave the house without ironed clothes or clean/polished shoes

Agree Kate

One odd thing is that I always get complimented on my looks when I am hungover/jetlagged

I usually make a tiny bit more effort those days (as you can't feel crap AND look crap! Too much...)

So just throwing straigteners at my hair (3 mins) and some lippy makes a difference, apparently!

Should do it every day

Misty - I have shoulder length fine hair and it's too fine for a ponytail. It does go in one, looks ok when newly done but goes a little bit sad and limp after an hour, not my ponytail of dreams!

So I gather hair together as if for a ponytail, twist (not tightly, just a loose twist), put the twisted bunch to my hair and then slide the long clip in to hold it. If your hair is slightly longer you can fold the ends back on themselves and then put the clip in. If your hair is slightly thicker you can criss-cross with another clip. Looks presentable and keeps fine hair out of the way!

I think good posture makes a big difference - stand up straight/shoulders back/head up and try to look confident.
Clean, ironed clothes, shoes polished and clean brushed hair as givens. Makeup if you have time (I rarely wear makeup but I do use tinted lip gloss and a quick swish of blusher if I'm looking wan).
I agree with pp, a spritz of light perfume (and no stinky cheap body sprays substituted for deodorant )

I'm probably repeating what's been said, but mine are:

Diet & exercise to keep my figure.
Eyebrow shape and tint every few weeks.
Highlights and cut every 12 weeks. Should be more often, but not possible with 3 DC as well as the cost.
A nice lipstick. Currently a pink glossy Dior.
Skinny jeans and a blazer.
Hair washed and blow dried.
Nails painted, no chips.
A nice bag and shoes.
Ankle boots with a high heel in Autumn and winter.

Oblamov, I found a make up school in Bath and booked a lesson. It was amazing. I just did a google of local make up artists, so take a look for places close to you.

I'm old,fat and frumpy and either look like a tramp or a bloke. Eddie Izzard looks better in a dress than I do. I don't want to spend ages on grooming and make up, can't cope with long nails( real or fake) and wouldn't have a fake tan. I also can't afford expensive clothes or to buy new stuff all the time. I would love to look groomed and elegant but I agree that it's easier if you are slim. Its all very well saying a good bra and well cut clothes flatter a fuller figure but they dont come cheap,and neither do hair cuts and salon colours and regular beauty treatments. I'm clean, thats about the best I can say.

For me effortless style is characterised by the French look really. So simple clothes, very rarely patterned, neutrals, not tends but maybe a nod to a trend but always with good quality basics. No cheap fabrics so natural fibres where possible. Nothing garish.
Never leggings. It's been a hot day today and the amount of women I've seen with leggings on under dresses that whatever size you are these dresses would look better without leggings.
Also French women aren't over styled.
But all this is just my opinion as it is a matter of opinion.

*trends not tends

I also agree it has a lot to do with how people feel inside. That can shine out.

Thanks Daisygarden, will give that a go. Have tried doing a twist with claw type clips in the past but they're always too loose.

' I'm clean, thats about the best I can say.'
that is SO SO sad - I am a keen believer in living your best life. There is always time to care for yourself

my other tip is to always make an effort . its the quick drop ins at the supermarket where you meet other people and if you look shit you feel shit

misty no worries! You don't need as much hair with these long clips. Also they are (in my opinion) more chic than the claw clips.

Also good for tying fine hair back is a barette clip as you don't need as much hair as you do for a great looking ponytail using hairbands.

If all else fails, get some good clip-in extensions and trim them to match your own hair. Nobody need ever know :-)

Looking groomed is something to do with having a pared down look which includes no 'extras' in the jowl or other departments.

I'm glad you said it first.
The sad truth is that it's easier to look groomed if you are slim.

Has anybody mentioned coats?

We spend so much time wearing coats due to our rubbish weather. It's the first thing most people see, even before they see what you're wearing underneath.
Make sure you buy good quality and that it fits well.
Coat, bag, shoes, need to be quality, the rest you can sometimes get away with cheaper.

Great thread.

Can I ask about clothes - plain things look better than prints right? I always seem to be drawn to prints, especially dresses. Shall I avoid?

Also, colours. After reading loads of threads about colours, I still have no clue what suits me. And isn't it all a bit subjective? I think I am a cool winter (dark hair and eyes, pale skin), what colours should I be wearing or avoid?

I will give you one tip, and it's the only one I have.

BE CONFIDENT.

All these 'tips' mean NOTHING if you do not walk out feeling your best self, I break all of these rules, I have grey hair, really grey hair, I LOVE IT, I have embraced it, looking old? fuck that! This is me, I put it up in a massive grey quiff every day. Nails? Fuck that, the only person that ever notices your nails is the person whose cock you're grabbing and by that point they don't care.

Eyebrows? Have some, that is all, good to have eyes too, doesn't matter what colour they are or how they are defined, can they see? FUCKING BRILLIANT. Look at the world with them.

Legs? Do your legs stride? Marvellous, let them stride, let them be strong, DON'T SLOUCH, you've nothing to be ashamed of, swing it baby.

Teeth? Do you have some? Do they work? AMAZING, so they're a bit crooked or yellow, SMILE, who gives a fuck.

SPEAK, do you have something to say? We all do, say it, don't mumble, say what you have to say. SPEAK.

We are all effortlessly human, (with a little effort), don't ever be humbled by others to not be yourself.

Really.

Am loving this thread - and the 'how to look expensive' one! Thing is, people always say it's easier to look groomed if you're slim (albeit, yes of course confidence is a prerequisite) but I'm thinking, how slim are we talking here?

I am a size 12 and constantly think I would feel slim if only I were a size 10. Does everyone just equate 'slim' with 'a bit thinner than I am now'?

I'm a size eight, always have been, maybe that makes it easier but at school I got the piss taken for having no tits and being a late-developer, so no, I don't think confidence equates to 'thin', confidence equates to 'confidence'!

I am tall and thin but with grey hair, no nails and not the best teeth (healthy but aesthetically not great).

BUT, I am confident, I KNOW, I am beautiful, I know I am, I'm 42, but don't feel the need to work at it or feel bad about myself.

Grooming means fuck all when it comes to attractiveness, I've seen very 'groomed' women who don't feel great about themselves, and it shows.

And I do spend a huge amount of money on my clothes, maybe that's a thing, but I buy very few clothes, very few, a couple of bits a year but £500 -£1000 a go, because, good fabrics and cuts make me feel fucking brilliant and look so much better, I just save the good things up, I honestly have about 150 items of clothing in total but my wardrobe's insured for about £50,000.

Maybe making yourself feel worth decent stuff is valuing yourself. To whatever value that is.