Looking effortlessly groomed...

[elliej83]

Hi everyone,

I've been a little glum this week as just find no matter how hard I try I always seem to look a bit unkept.

I have very fine hair which is always wispy no matter if I tie it up or have it down. Shorter styles are even worse to keep. I always seem to have bags under my eyes and just look a little unkept.

I was discussing this with a friend today who said that its one of those things you either have or you don't. Or... You spend a fortune to get.

Does anyone have any tips on looking groomed on a budget?

A quote that I remember years ago from actor Diana Rigg - "Sparkling cleanliness is the very height of elegance" and although I would never claim to be groomed myself I agree. Clean, glossy hair; short, shiny nails with no hint of ragged cuticle; stain- and food-free teeth; freshly washed and pressed clothes with no holes, stains or hanging threads; polished shoes and a handbag that doesn't look knackered. Only the very young and very thin can successfully pull off the grunge look without looking cheap and grubby. But it's all a good deal of hard work

There was a thread on here a few months back "how to look expensive". It's hands down the best style thread I've ever read. It ran into thousands of posts, I've marked it & every now & again re-read it.

Agree with pp, select colours that suit your skin tone.
Hair done regularly
Clothes that suit you rather than the latest trend.
Teeth/nails/eyebrows are so important
I go with more expensive shoes & accessories to complete my look.

I agree with many previous posters, I'm on a budget and have been since being a student. Some basic tips that have served me well (and which aren't a huge amount of effort) are:

• Decent skincare regime, I.e. Wash your face and moisturise in the morning, wash your face with something gentle like a cold cream at night. This can be really cheap, I've used olive oil before for nighttime cleanser, it's brilliant.
• perfume. Everyday- find something you like and which suits you and wear one small spray- it will last ages, but it gives a real 'lift' to the impression we make
• good underwear. If you have money to spend, spend it here first

With clothes:

• work out what shapes/silhouettes suit you and stick with them
• work out what colours you like and suit you best, pick 2 neutrals (mine are grey and navy), two bold colours (dark green and cobalt for me) and accents (bright green, berry pink, bright blue).
• buy items in your colours and shapes that you really like, and make sure everything you buy goes with at least 3 other things in your wardrobe.
• buy accessories in your accent colours
• Buy stuff that lasts, as good quality as you can afford, and build up slowly, decent stuff lasts and your wardrobe will get closer to complete over time.

-most importantly: TAILORING. Getting stuff altered so it fits perfectly makes it look expensive, but is actually pretty cheap.

After that, if you iron things that need ironing and pluck your eyebrows, you shouldn't have to think about putting outfits together as most of your stuff will just 'go'.

Although, if you can't be bothered with any of the above, lipstick makes you look like you've thought about what you're doing all on its own...

And stand up straight; don't apologise for existing with your body language.

LadyMary There was a thread on here a few months back "How to look Expensive"

Yes, I mentioned it on here, page 3. I agree, it was an excellent thread.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/style_and_beauty/2537782-How-to-look-expensive

Bit late to the party, but I found yoga didn't improve my posture nearly as much as Pilates.

Other than that, I have gone down hill in the last year. I have smart clothes but CBA ironing them and my new-last-winter black coat is covered in dog hairs

I really must put some effort in.

I think the problem is, there is no such thing as "effortlessly groomed". It seems to me that it's bloody hard work.

You have to be thin and have a reasonable amount of disposable income. It's also about how you carry yourself.

I used to be very thin, but I've never been elegant, however hard I tried. By contrast, my friend who was the same size/height as me was known as "the tall slim one". I was a klutz who galumphed around...she wafted elegantly. We bought our clothes from the same shops (she was skint too) but she just wore things better and had innate style.

Now I'm fat, I've given up all hope. I'm clean, nails done, hair trimmed regularly, nice makeup wand I wear clothes that suit me but I just don't have "it".

It doesn't have to be hard work or cost a fortune OP.

I always look groomed and I don't spend ages or a fortune.

With your hair there's lots of products you can buy now to make your hair look thicker,you can get them in the supermarkets,boots,superdrug.

I have thick hair so I have layers put into mine,one of our DD's used to have really thin hair,I cut all of the wispy bits of(took about 5 inches of)and shaped it into a longer bob.Now she has lovely long thick hair.
If you speak to a hairdresser they should be able to recommend a cut that should help.

Wear clean ironed clothes that fit well and you feel good in.
Get your hair into a style you like.
Keep your nails clean and shaped or short.
Toe nails short and painted if you wear sandals or open toed shoes.
Look after your feet,remove any hard skin.
With the bags under your eyes,do you think it's lack of sleep,your low in iron/vitamins?If it's neither of those there are lots of products now that can remove(for several hours)or cover bags under the eyes.
Look after your skin and teeth and shape or have your eyebrows shaped.
Shave or wax often.

I wash my hair every other day,I get it cut every 6 weeks.
I do my feet every time I have a bath.
I remove any unwanted hair 3 times a week.
My finger nails and toe nails I do once a week.
My skin I cleanse and stick some moisturiser on every morning and evening,it takes me less than 5 minutes each time,I do a face mask when I feel like it.
I do my own eyebrows when they need doing.
I have a scale and polish at my Dentists a couple of times a year.
It most probably works out about 20 minutes a day for me.

Take a good hard look at yourself, your shape, weight, height, skin tone and good features that you want to emphasise, and figure out what sort of clothes and colours suit you, as opposed to what's in right now.

Get yourself a bra that actually fits you.

Ask around for a really good hairstylist and get a haircut that won't make you look ungroomed. It needs to suit your face shape too.

Wear perfume every day.

Moisturise your face and hands daily, and arms too. Preferably your whole body, but if pressed for time just do the visible bits.

Get a facial from time to time if affordable. Otherwise, do a home face mask weekly.

Make sure your eyebrows are neat.

Mascara always helps.

I think it comes down to priorities too - I will prioritise getting the housework done rather than looking after myself. I wish I didn't but I do!

I use the Michelle Obama method. Every time I'm shopping or picking what to wear, I think, "would Michelle wear this?".

I know that it is a bit insane. I think of people whose style I admire and who are a similar shape to me, then I take inspiration from them (or their stylists, haha).

I have been described as 'well presented'. Good old FLOTUS.

I really enjoy reading threads like this and it always gives me the kick up the bum inspiration I need every few months! I prefer wearing quite neutral colours and always feel more groomed in them. The problem is I struggle to find shops to buy my clothes in as my nearest town is seriously lacking in options! I like H & M, Zara, Gap and Oasis and can't bear Next. Can anyone give me some ideas for online shops I might like that aren't super expensive?

Hair Brown no red - agree. My hairdresser said ' 6, 7- 0 not 3' no idea what it means but it works.

A smile always lifts your look. Walk tall with your head held high.
Imagine yourself to be dressed in clean, matching and well fitting clothes, imagine also that you have elegant high heels on and walk accordingly, if this is a forgotten skill then trying on shoes in a shoe shop is free (you don't have to make a purchase), get acquainted with how you walk and remember your posture.
Then, even if you are wearing those comfy, old, but favourite, Bridget Jones knickers, imagine yourself to be wearing something a little more classy. Think Victoria's Secret or Rigby and Peller or perhaps Agent Provocateur, though I couldn't bring myself to buy anything for real, not at their prices, even if I was a millionaire!
Be a convincing actress and believe yourself to be looking utterly gorgeous and you will start to feel differently about yourself. Obviously, if you have time and the inclination, clean, neat nails and polished shoes. A bright lipstick takes focus from the less than perfect bits. As for the hair, sometimes it seems as if nothing will make it look any tidier. Get yourself along to any hairdressing school and offer yourself up for free hair styling, not cutting. You may find you learn a quick, easy and life saving up do. If not then invest in some hats, bucket ones are super trendy and suit most face types.
It really is about confidence and if yours has taken a bit of a dive then ACT, ACT and ACT. Just pretend and imagine, walk tall, hold your head high and smile. It's half the battle won.
Above all else, be kind to yourself because you are so worth it."

Seriously, these tips are great but if you pay attention to fabric style and fit then you can look stylish and groomed even wnen larger, i wish people would stop saying you cant look well groomed if overweight or larger, what absolute rubbish and a few have said it so far on this thread or put being thin in their list of things needed to be well groomed.

I know many stylish well groomed bigger people.

Also great eyebrows, white teeth, done nails, soft feet, good makeup if needed, wellgroomed hair, stylish quality accs are not mutually exclusive with being thin and can be achieved when overweight.

I'm told by other mums and work colleagues "you always look nice" / "you never look a mess" / "you have lovely clothes" etc...
I'm by no means a natural beauty. Nearly 40. Very short. Thin. Greying hair.
My tips:
Yes IRON.
Whilst ironing, I also trim any loose threads on clothes. I check for stains or holes and replace items immediately if in that state.
I wear what works for me rather than what's in fashion. Slim jeans, low wedge sandals, ankle boots, stripe ts, pretty blouses, tea dresses, fitted cashmere jumpers. I don't spend a huge amount. Mid price high street and sales.
I spend more on a good leather bag, good leather shoes and a good coat.
I keep my hair in a short bob. Again it's a style that works for my hair type. I have it cut and coloured every 6 weeks.
I get my eye brows threaded each month and tidy them myself in between. I paint my own nails. Toes a dark colour and finger nails with Dior nail glow which makes them appear manicured.

Eat well,
Work out to tone
Ensure nails neat
Paint toe nails in summer
Have hair regularly cut
Think about what you're going to wear, what looks good
Wear a bit of make up. The difference that tinted moisturiser, blush and mascara can make is incredible
Perfume

I feel good. I look good. Life to short to feel crap about some,thing which you can sort

Oh and eyebrows must be neat!!!!

My advice is keep it simple and tidy.

Op, with fine hair I have found the big clips (a bit like the ones hairdressers use for sectioning, but nicer, you can buy them at the hair clips stands in supermarkets etc) are great for keeping fine hair tidy. A lot of fine hair is too fine for a ponytail.

Simple makeup routine. I always have a dab of lipstick and mascara on as a basic.

A good neat fitting coat. Not something that looks puffy or crumpled.

Neat shoes. I don't wear trainers, what with the clompy look and the laces they are not "neat".

A neat bag! Again nothing baggy or saggy or with loads of pockets and zips.

Often I just wear one dress and a pair of tights. Or a jumper and skirt and tights. I don't wear loads of layers, or tops that cling to my tummy and boobs (even fitted t shirts).

Dancing Tatty - you asked for online shops recommendations - I can thoroughly recommend ASOS which has a lot of high street brands plus many international brands and there are usually lots of bargains and sales. Their own-brand ASOS clothes are well made and priced reasonably for the quality, I feel. For delivery, if you pay £9.99 as a one-off you get free next day delivery and free returns for a year. The delivery can be to your house or a Collect + centre which is usually a convenience store or a petrol station. I only buy clothes online and ASOS can't be beaten for their delivery options, in my opinion.

flirtygirl agree that larger people can look very stylish and well groomed. The only difference is that cheaper clothes can sometimes hang better on thinner people, and larger people can benefit from better quality fabrics and cuts. I say this as a former overweight person myself (now a size 8 after finally getting a permanent grip on my overeating habit). But size is definitely no obstacle to style as such. I read some fashion blogs and one of the best that I have had most fashion tips from is a girl who is a size 22-24. Her colour combinations and style is excellent and I must have taken inspiration from around 10 of her posts now.

Make sure your clothes fit well
Iron everything
Keep your roots done
Blow dry
Have groomed but natural looking eyebrows
Keep your nails tidy, no overly long falsies
Buy tailored clothing, limit the lycra
Wear well fitting bras
Go for style over fashion
Keep your shoes clean

Aargh I'm feeling like I've totally "lost it" now at 35, I know that's not old but my bags and shadows tell a different story! I have really fine hair and even with regular cuts and colour it looks rubbish again like a poor excuse for nice hair within 3 weeks of being done. I have patches of sun damage from abusing my skin in my teens and early 20's on my forehead and cheeks, I've tried everything from the shops and I'm now at the point of thinking I'll have to pay for laser treatment to reduce it. My teeth are no longer white, wisdom teeth have made them crowd a bit, I worry about clothes and whether I should stay away from anything vaguely trendy now, but find some styles so boring or frumpy so half the time I'm in jeans vest and cardi, or leggings and tunic. The only thing I have left is being slim!

Looking at other mums on the school run there are lots of younger trendy and well groomed around here, I'm not trying to be like them because I can't be, I wish I'd appreciated what I had 5-10 years ago though!

Finding this thread really helpful for tips!

Reading this thread is just exhausting TBH.

There are only 3 things that I believe are important

• Iron your clothes
• Buy something that fits you or have it altered
• Buy good quality clothes. Cheap ones means that the material will change shape after a few wears and you will look 'unkept'.

After that, it's a lot of money and time to spend that I just do not have TBH.

Tried to get out of her what colour she used - she said "flat 6 mixed with a bit of 7" if anyone understands that

totally it's what I have - with lighter foils - very few - just to lift it

I've gone from bright red home dyed for years to brond - it's taken a year and it's cost a fortune

I'm not massively groomed - I don't wear make up or have nice nails but I do look nice - I like classic things like a good white shirt with jeans or nice work pants with a colourful plain top - I do wear shoes without socks - sorry!

Unkempt.

Hair Brown no red - agree. My hairdresser said ' 6, 7- 0 not 3' no idea what it means but it works
Whuut?