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Crepe And Stormy

999 replies

Cremo · 04/04/2016 14:55

Over here Crepemunks!
Hope no one else has started oneSmile

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motherinferior · 17/04/2016 10:07

We knew each other vaguely for about 18 months before.

Can I explain what is really driving me mad with my mum ATM? It's the lack of knowledge about what is provided and/or what we are supposed to provide as she gets worse. As far as I can see it's a bit more district nursing and the palliative care nurse plus the GP (and equipment like oxygen tanks). The GP put me onto the palliative consultant who just talked in circumlocution and patronised me. I got really pissed off with him and then started to cry.

I am just confused about all of it.

MrsSchadenfreude · 17/04/2016 10:53

We started off with a shag after a party and then started "dating" after that. I had known him for a year though, we were good friends first.

Stropperella · 17/04/2016 11:12

GGG, aww, thank you. :) I am unable to post as much as previously as I am slightly struggling with my rather fragmented life at the moment and much of the time I don't seem to have the time and emotional energy available to put a decent sentence together.

Dh and I have been together for 13 years now. I might get hate mail from lurkers if I posted all the hows, whys and wherefores about our first meeting in RL (we met and talked online for 6 months before then - while we were both getting divorced). Let's just say, everything was quite, um, colourful.

MI, they say that palliative care is a postcode lottery and generally a mess. It is extra hard if you are trying to sort it all out remotely. Please remember no one really expects you to have a magic wand, even if they sound as if they do.

Sometimes, I just hate the digital age and feel as though I would like to take myself far, far away from our society's obsession with effing selfies and documenting every banal detail of our everyday existence with photos. Last night, I went (rather grudgingly) out with a bunch of younger people (some of whom I didn't know) and there is now an exceptionally hideous photo of me floating round FB. I try to let go of the sense of intrusion I feel when people insist on taking photos of me (as part of a group) and putting them up for the world to see, but I actually really, really loathe it - to the point where I would rather not go out with these people. Which is a bit sad. I also, I have found out, don't like always being at least 10 years older than everybody else. Which is probably also a bit sad. I prefer the company of the crepeys. Grin

MrsSchadenfreude · 17/04/2016 11:40

MI - my mother went through the chaos that is palliative care with my DDad. One of the nurses managed to sort a lot of it out for her, as she was sent from pillar to post, given phone numbers that didn't exist, organisations to call that didn't have what was needed. Can your mum's GP help at all?

Blackduck · 17/04/2016 12:21

Stropps so with you on the photo thing - I hate it. I used to hate friends putting pics of ds on the web too......

MI sounds tough and I understand what you are saying about the lack prof information/ knowledge.

Cremo · 17/04/2016 12:24

Jeez MI, it sounds awful having to sort out palliative care on top of the grief you must already feel. like you I would feel dreadful , not being on top of it. Please don't. It is such a waste of your precious energy at this juncture. Things are happening so fast I think, given the patchy state of affairs in the NHS, you are not going to get anywhere. I think another call to the GP might help put your mind at rest. I really hope so anyway. Go easy on yourself and pull back, for your own sanity if you can.

Today we are threatening to do some serious garden shifting and tidying. That is if I can get Dh to stop waiting for it to rain, and therefore get out of doing anything. I did some extreme domestic surgery this morning at top speed. Trying to get myself a bit fitter, so got to keep moving.Wink
Dh is away with work all week, so I can finally Get On With Things, and paint on into the evening, which is impossible if he's here watching Agents Of Shield on a loopGrin

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Cremo · 17/04/2016 12:27

Agree with you about the Facebook photo thing. I had a huge row with a colleague who put up a drunk photo of me without saying anything. It's the bloody intrusion and presumption I loathe. One of the reasons I don't do FB.

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motherinferior · 17/04/2016 12:58

The GP doesn't know. I was in her office when I threw the wobbly. Auriga has been amazing ThanksThanksThanksand suggests her palliative care nurse.

motherinferior · 17/04/2016 12:58

There is a horrible FB pic of me at a party which makes me despair.

Cremo · 17/04/2016 13:06

Sounds right MI. Auriga is of course the appropriate person.Thanks
:0(

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MrsSchadenfreude · 17/04/2016 13:32

Agree re photos. My wonky eye is very evident in photos, and I look about 90.

Dreamqueen · 17/04/2016 13:45

Sorry I have no advice MI.
I also hate photos because i have a droopy eye which I forget about until I see a pic.

motherinferior · 17/04/2016 13:52

And my sister is in sane and vv sensible mode, as is family friend who is my age.

Stropperella · 17/04/2016 14:45

I should be doing hard labour in the garden. (BTM can vouch for the unloved state of said garden), but I am collecting my scattered thoughts by trying out a new recipe for chocolate fudge brownies. Mmmmm.
Ds has gone out to the cinema with 3 girls and has just rung to say they have dragged him into New Look after the film. Dd thinks this is hilarious. Grin

MI, sending you hugs.

bigTillyMint · 17/04/2016 15:51

Stropps, your garden definitely doesn't look unloved! And Envy at chocolate fudge brownies!

DD has passed her coaching exam! HurrayWineChocolate

I am hoping none of the photos of me from my yoof (owned by friends as we didn't do selfies in the Dark Ages) ever make onto FB - I don't think there are any of me soberBlush

Rosebag · 17/04/2016 18:40

MI just a thought.....did you start off with a SW at some point? I just mention it because my DParents one was ace at coordinating services and acting like a key worker. Of course we were lucky to get a good one. Sorry if this is no help at all. Sad Flowers

I am now very Blush about my postings on Facebook.....but if I'm very honest these days I'm just happy to see postings about friends and family and what they get up to. All I seem to get on my news feed are political rants, unsolicited advertising and constant, unrelenting hounding by Hotter...Hmm I don't have a droopy eye, I don't think, but my nose always casts a shadow over the entire photo owing to its size... Grin

DH and I have been married 19 years and met two years prior to that, but of course, I have a back story and had another life. If I'd stayed married to DH number one, I'd have clocked up 36 years, having been a child bride Blush

Good news re DD tilly and hope you feel better soon.

We have been to a stone setting, and a lunch after. DD has now gone to a party and DS2 is off to hear his friend's band in Islington. We are all arguing over the arrangements for the summer hols. Sigh. At least there's The Durrels and Under Cover to watch tonight....

motherinferior · 17/04/2016 18:42

No SW but I think it's the palliative care nurse. She comes every day. I tried to get DSis to ask her for clarity but she won't. I forget that DSis doesn't like talking to people in that way. We're very different.

Stropperella · 17/04/2016 19:39

I don't just have a droopy eye, I have an entire droopy side to my face, thanks to having a bad case of Bell's Palsy in my teens, which left me with synkinesis, which appears to be getting worse with age. I am also possibly one of the least photogenic people ever. It's a sad combo. Dh's comment on the FB photos: "Mmm, one is OK, but in the other one you have a giant chin and look like an old boot. Why does that keep happening?" Dd's comment: "Well, the rest of them aren't exactly teen models, are they?" Not sure which comment is worse.

bigTillyMint · 17/04/2016 19:58

Grin at your DDs comment, Stropps.

A Chinese takeaway has been consumed en famille here - it's actually been quite a nice family few days since Thurs. Must be due a huge blow-up!

Stropperella · 17/04/2016 20:24

Well done (and phew!!) to your dd, BTM. Good to have that qualification in the bag.

Ds has regaled us during supper with tales of this afternoon's shopping trip with his harem. Apparently they were bra shopping. Confused He said he couldn't see the point "as none of them have any bosoms." Grin

motherinferior · 17/04/2016 20:32

Both your offspring aren't short of words, are they.Wink

We have had apple crumble and custard (proper egg custard not packet) made by DD2, after pasta and puy lentils cooked by me. I did point out to DP this lunchtime that since his older daughter went back to eating meat he has resumed an almost entirely sausage-based cuisine. I like sausages - and chorizo definitely improves Wet Fish With Tomatoes - but, you know, there are other foodstuffs in the world, some of which do not clog up one's arteries....

CointreauVersial · 17/04/2016 23:35

Evening, crepeys. Been reading, but not posting for the last few days....to be honest, there wasn't much to report.

Monty, Auriga - I have been thinking of you both this week. Flowers

It's been another weekend of Not Much Going On; I got up early yesterday to watch DS's last football match, but predictably it poured with rain, and I got very cold and muddy (they won, though). In the afternoon I went shopping, but took back more than I actually bought (strangely satisfying). Today, DH and I took ourselves off for a little drive, ostensibly to check another route for DH's future commute to Wimbledon, but we ended up in Wimbledon Village, eating cake and watching the posh people. I bought an anniversary card (coming up to 14 years married/21 years together, FYI...) with the slogan "You are the wind beneath my bingo wings".

I did do one productive thing this week, and have ordered cavity wall insulation. Our electricity provider is picking up most of the bill, which is a result, ho ho.

CointreauVersial · 17/04/2016 23:54

Correction....TWO productive things. I sorted out my bursting wardrobe and Kondo-folded all my clothes. It has changed my life (not really).

Cremo · 18/04/2016 07:09

Well done CV, that's quite productive really. I am always torn at weekends , between whether to rest and relax or get on with stuff.its usually a random mix of the two, with churning guilt if I just flop on the sofa. Spend 4 hours outside yesterday in sunshine, but it was icy cold and my fingers nearly dropped off.
Have painted up all the wooden flower boxes on the deck ready for planting.
This week promises to be punishing at work. Number of test events in new venues, plus helping out dps who have returned from abroad with the virus from hell. ( same one I had) poor Dad is really sick, and mum is quite weak. Off to fix their dinner for them later.
Happy Monday Crepeys.Thanks

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Blackduck · 18/04/2016 08:32

'productive'? Hmmm... does doing school lunches, cooking dinner(s), laundry, etc. count?

I went for a long walk still trying to process whole mum and BDHound thing. Not easy. Partic as mum had a particularly lucid day yesterday including telling ddad she was being a real nuisance and being fully aware that she couldn't remember things (her own middle name despite the fact this is the name she is known by).... :(

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