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Original poster

end of tether with bras....sizing, fit and style

248 replies

poppymoon · 20/01/2015 13:53

and very embarrassed that i have got to 40 something years of age and have never ever worn a bra that felt comfortable. this is probably because i have never had a correctly fitting one.

most of the time i have 'worn' a 36A strapless (so i could whip the torturous thing off easily). it would appear, however, that i am actually supposed to be wearing a 34DD/E.

PLEASE DO NOT LAUGH - hahahahahahaha ahhhh go on then as it is stupidly funny.

i did some reading and measuring and reckoned that by my measurements, a 34D would 'do' (one side is a bit smaller than the other). the lady in bravissimo got me to try on a DD and i thought that was alright but she still wasn't happy with 'tissue and wires' so put me in a 34E (which looked baggy to me but i obviously know nothing).

then i bought a pretty balcony style bra from M & S. the 34DD fitted ok but really rubbed under my arms (at the front of my flabby pit, not near the wire). i eventually asked for help. the fitter fetched several matronly bras and juggled me into them. she also fetched the pretty one but in a plunge style rather than balcony. she said the 34dd wasn't big enough and gave me an E.

now i'm home, the E cup feels too big again for me and i still really want a balcony bra. i've been reading that some have wider wires than others and i've got myself in a mucking fuddle.

soooooo, could anyone please advise me on the way these contraptions are supposed to fit 'properly' and let me know if there really may be a 'wider wire, narrower straps' balcony bra out there?

OP posts:
Original poster
poppymoon · 26/01/2015 17:52

hehehehehehehe. i don't ask for much do i Wink

i'm thinking i'll keep the freya deco as it does fit well overall and yes, i reckon i need just a bit wider for bigger nork rather than deeper. best make a 'danger, wide load' sign. the armpit fat is just that. armpit fat.

(and should i mention that i hate shoes and would rather be barefoot.....).

you, my friend, have the patience of a saint Wine

OP posts:
StatisticallyChallenged · 26/01/2015 18:33

You might actually find that it improves with time (and scooping) - quite a lot of people have found that once the wire is wider and contains better, their boobs seem to grow a size - just because the armpit fat moves in!

I think at some point it might be worth you trying the Cleo Maddie (try a 34F, it's a small one!) and the Cleo Juna (probably a 32F), as they're both fairly wide but not as tall. I'd give your Deco more time though, it doesn't sound dire

marriednotdead · 26/01/2015 18:48

I feel your pain OP!
One of the issues is that your breasts finish essentially 'wider than your armpits' hence the straps rubbing at the outer edge- the same thing happens to me, and is the curse of the fashion known as balconette. You may need the centralisation of full cup straps combined with wide short shallow cups. I wouldn't discount trying some strapless bras with the straps on!

I find the Maddie strap placement worse than the Patsy, and the Juna is way too deep so digs between my boobs terribly. As mine are so soft now, they look great in anything that doesn't tilt them- most of the Cleo and Panache styles- but I find them agony Hmm

And so the quest for the holy grail continues...

Original poster
poppymoon · 26/01/2015 19:50

just had a look at those two stats and i like the style as they usually give me a decent shape. i'll give them a go but i'm wary of how wide the straps are.

wish i could find something that shoves them forward without making them weirdly pointy with lace practically up to my collar bone.

doesn't sound like i'll find 'the one' for a while then married. i did buy a lovely strapless (well two of them) whilst trying to find my size. one is 'after eden' and the other is 'ultimo'. both lovely bras - and both a 34d. i didn't send them back as they fitted better than the 36a i'd been wearing but looking at them now......who was i kidding!! more funds wasted.

OP posts:
Pointlessfan · 26/01/2015 21:17

I ordered them from Bravissimo. If they are not successful I'll shop around a bit more. I was very restrained and didn't buy the knickers, thought I'd wait and see if they fit first.

Original poster
poppymoon · 26/01/2015 23:17

Hope at least one of them fits well pointless.

OP posts:
Pointlessfan · 27/01/2015 06:08

Thanks poppy.

StatisticallyChallenged · 27/01/2015 08:36

It is very difficult, balconettes are great shapes on a lot of people but the straps are a PITA! In addition to wearing a strapless with the straps, I'm wondering if there is anything multi way which might work - where you could wear it with the back straps crossed over which would pull the straps out of your armpits a bit. I've heard good things about the new Curvy Kate Luxe strapless although I've not tried it yet - maybe MarriedNotDead can advise what the wires are like on it? CK are normally wide wired

You also get bra strap holders which pull the straps in to the centre at the back. They're really designed for those awkward dresses with cut outs and racer backs, but I wonder if they might be worth a try if you find something which fits but has nippy straps.

I'm sorry this is proving so difficult! It's just a tricky combination I think

Original poster
poppymoon · 27/01/2015 10:14

I've decided that I'm going to give my relationship with freya (deco moulded) a darn good go. she gives a good shape and I think it's a bit of wire with and depth causing the issue with big nork. who's to say anything will ever fit perfectly. we'll be spending several hours together today so maybe the armpit scaffold will soften a bit. I can but hope...... I really need some strapless for summer so I may try the deco strapless (in the same size?).

OP posts:
Pointlessfan · 27/01/2015 15:29

If I ever win the lottery I am getting all my bras, shoes and trousers made to measure!

StatisticallyChallenged · 27/01/2015 16:10

Trousers, definitely! If I don't adjust them, they don't fit (15" hip to waist difference...I have no hope!)

Original poster
poppymoon · 27/01/2015 16:26

if i ever win the lottery, i will be far away from here - wearing a bikini and sarong. no bras, shoes or trousers!

OP posts:
Pointlessfan · 27/01/2015 16:35

What if the bikini doesn't fit?! You'll have to take Statistically with you!!!

Original poster
poppymoon · 27/01/2015 17:35

aarrgghhhh!!!

coconut shells Grin or failing that,

stark wotsit nekkid Grin

OP posts:
StatisticallyChallenged · 27/01/2015 17:37

So far away from here, on a private island!

Or you could just hire me to be your boob adviser Grin

Original poster
poppymoon · 27/01/2015 18:55

sunshine and sea would be nice though........

back to comfy old vest top tonight.

OP posts:
Original poster
poppymoon · 27/01/2015 18:59

ooohhhhh just found a freya deco half cup pretty cheap. should i order the same size as the other deco or may it fit totally differently.......

is it too much to ask to want a white, black and skin tone brassiere?

OP posts:
StatisticallyChallenged · 27/01/2015 19:24

It would definitely be worth a shot as it might sort the gaping issue out. I've never tried it as I'm waaaayy sized out (I don't think it would cover my nipples!) but I'd start with the same size.

There is also a Deco shape, which is basically a deco with multiway straps

Original poster
poppymoon · 27/01/2015 19:42

i'm trying to find a store locally which stocks a varied range as i'm spending too much on postage, only to return the items. its proving difficult.

ahhhhhhh my old strappy vest is soooooo comfy though Smile

OP posts:
Original poster
poppymoon · 27/01/2015 19:51

(and don't worry about covering your nips stats. i'll whittle you some from the coconut shells i find - unless you need the whole shell Shock)

OP posts:
StatisticallyChallenged · 27/01/2015 20:40

I definitely need a whole shell. I can get the cups of my sports bra on my head!

marriednotdead · 27/01/2015 20:57

Ooh! Think the half cup may fit more like the strapless so may be a little generous. It's stops at an F otherwise I'd have had one ages ago

White bras should be outlawed, sorry!

Upatree · 27/01/2015 21:02

I managed to reach the age of 35 before I found any flattering bras that were comfortable - La Senza size 36DD. Imagine my horror when shortly afterwards they went into administration. I bought virtually every bra in their shop in my size in their closing down sale.

Original poster
poppymoon · 27/01/2015 21:17

so i may need to go down a cup size in the half cup from the deco plunge married?

i like to have a couple of white bras but i wear skin tone a lot. i do like matching sets though but i'm not keen on skin coloured pants.

i went into boux avenue recently upatree and that reminded me a lot of la senza.

OP posts:
marriednotdead · 27/01/2015 22:00

The Deco plunge tips your boobs into the centre because of the strap positioning, you may need the same size but without seeing you I can't be sure. Can you order both?

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