end of tether with bras....sizing, fit and style

[poppymoon]

and very embarrassed that i have got to 40 something years of age and have never ever worn a bra that felt comfortable. this is probably because i have never had a correctly fitting one.

most of the time i have 'worn' a 36A strapless (so i could whip the torturous thing off easily). it would appear, however, that i am actually supposed to be wearing a 34DD/E.

PLEASE DO NOT LAUGH - hahahahahahaha ahhhh go on then as it is stupidly funny.

i did some reading and measuring and reckoned that by my measurements, a 34D would 'do' (one side is a bit smaller than the other). the lady in bravissimo got me to try on a DD and i thought that was alright but she still wasn't happy with 'tissue and wires' so put me in a 34E (which looked baggy to me but i obviously know nothing).

then i bought a pretty balcony style bra from M & S. the 34DD fitted ok but really rubbed under my arms (at the front of my flabby pit, not near the wire). i eventually asked for help. the fitter fetched several matronly bras and juggled me into them. she also fetched the pretty one but in a plunge style rather than balcony. she said the 34dd wasn't big enough and gave me an E.

now i'm home, the E cup feels too big again for me and i still really want a balcony bra. i've been reading that some have wider wires than others and i've got myself in a mucking fuddle.

soooooo, could anyone please advise me on the way these contraptions are supposed to fit 'properly' and let me know if there really may be a 'wider wire, narrower straps' balcony bra out there?

the eden pants will be cheaper than the 3rd bra you are sending back.......win win situation!!

Hmmm, not finding the Eden very comfortable, it feels like it's moving around. I might be changing it for another Deco!
If the Deco fits well which other bras might be good to try?

stevie it only took me about a week after stopping BF, for the boobs to return to pre-pregnancy size and stay there. It varies though, some people gain or lose weight after stopping, that would also affect the size.

thats a shame pointless. does the band feel too loose? must admit, the deco is really sturdy in the band, it doesn't move at all. i notice how snug they fit now whereas before i just presumed they should be uncomfortable.

i'm wearing a debenhams 'gorgeous' today and i'm finding it pretty good. not as great as the deco band-wise but pleased about finding something a bit cheaper as i like to have lots of different colours. (and matching pants obviously ).

Hi all. I was just about to start a thread asking for help on this - at the grand old age of 41 and almost 2 years after giving birth, I've finally decided I'm fed up of wearing the ONE bra I have bought since then which doesn't fit anyway!

I was measured as a 36B after finishing breastfeeding, but I seem to have the same problem as a lot of you - I could shove a whole box of tissues down the top as there is so much room, but the cup doesn't seem big enough widthwise and the straps are constantly falling off my shoulders.

I've just gone onto the bra guru's measuring guide and based on my measurements (under = 31.5, fullest when bent over = 35.5) I should be a 32D - seriously???? So having read all this thread I'm in for a loooong search for my perfect bra.....

I'm not sure if I should be going to plunge or balcony though? I've been told that because my cleavage (what cleavage?) is wide I should avoid a balcony, but my head says a balcony would suit a wide gap because the wires come up in that gap? Blimey, it's almost daunting enough to make me stay in my rubbish 36B!

Poppy, at least I will save money on the Eden knickers! Yes it is the band that's loose. I'm tempted to just get another Deco in a different colour.
Welcome, Greta. You sound a very similar shape and size to me and I have never got on with balcony bras. I hope one of the amazing bra ladies will be along to help you soon!

Hi Pointless - well I'm obviously on a mission tonight (maybe because the husband has gone out!) and have just ordered 13 bras to go and try on in House of Fraser tomorrow - a variation of shapes and 32C and D's so I bloomin' well hope I end up with at least 1 to come home with!

Good luck, hope you find one that fits.

Thanks HazleNutt, I think they're pretty much back to normal size seeing as I've been doing it for 10 months and am now only feeding first thing in the morning. I'm going to have some free time soon so will pop into Bravissimo in town and see how it goes.

I found the unlined and unpadded freya ones seemed to come up smaller pointless. I thought I'd found a brand that would consistently fit me. Sigh.

I'm quite liking this Debenhams one and at half the price of a deco, I can manage with the band feeling 'flimsier'.

Welcome to the merry go round of the quest for comfort there are some lovely, knowledgeable ladies on here and I hope you have some success tomorrow.

(Maybe the grey pants to match the deco should be purchased to console yourself pointless...........

sorry, i meant to add your name after i said welcome, gretagrape

I'm going to end up with pants aren't I..?!

Yes.

See it as a celebration for finding something nice that fits properly

I resisted! Got another Deco in black and since most of my knickers are black I wasn't tempted to buy any. There is a top in Bravissimo I love so hoping not to have to go back in in case my resolve weakens!

Proud of your resolve pointless

Hmm, well my first shot at finding my perfect bra didn't go too well. The cup fitted pretty well (32D better than 32C), but I just couldn't get used to how tight the band is. I'm only a size 10, but there was this massive bulge between the band and my arm that looked awful!
I brought two home, but after wearing them for 15 mins I had red lines all the way round me, and if my arms are straight down by my sides the straps are right up against the underarm 'crease'. I think that is because although they are called plunge they are almost balcony so the straps are too far out for me.
So - I have decided I am spending the whole of next Saturday in London looking for a bra. I'm not fussy - just one black and one natural will do and if I can't find one there I'm stuffed aren't I?!

You need to scoop firmly to pull that bulge forward in to the cups. You might also need a style which has a wider wire - kind of similar to a lot of the advice above. Proper plunges and full cups will generally have straps which are further in too.

It will take a little while to get used to the tighter bands, and a red mark is pretty normal - just like you would get with socks!

I've struggled with the armpit thing too gretagrape but I've stuck with it with the 2 I felt fitted well apart from that and it has got easier. I really don't notice it much now. Similar with the bands being firmer, I only notice now if one is too loose as it irritates the hell out of me.

As for the fat bulges, I'd read that they can 'migrate' but felt a bit sceptical. However, since wearing a correctly sized bra for even this short amount of time, I'm pretty sure that everything is more forward pointing and less bulgy already.

The new, black Deco is giving me a lot more cleavage than the grey one I got last week. Other than that they seem the same - both fit well. How strange!

Black bras often run slightly smaller than their paler coloured counterparts. It's to do with the way dye interacts with fabric I believe - it's probably just ever so slightly smaller

can boobs start to grow when you're in your 40's?

Wearing a bra that fits can definitely make them appear to - reverse migration is a definite thing!

you ain't kidding!!

all my life i felt under-endowed in the bosom department and now i'm paranoid about what i wear in case they look big . teenage angst revisited.