The Darling Crepes of May

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My turn......

MI you are none of the things you fear you have become. You are terrifically strong feisty and wonderful . Your lovely girls are who they are because of you. The lack of work is not down to you, but a result of how things are out there at the moment. I think it is amazing how you have been able to continue writing given the state of work offered. Don't let anyone cast aspersions on your creativity( book)
Get thee to a hairdresser and give yourself a much needed boost
Indecision is grim- I have the same all the time. In this situation any small decisive move can be considered a major victory. book the flights and find somewhere that is available for those dates. Sometimes it's easier to work within defined parameters than have no decision made at all.
I too have a glam mother , but she is not perfect. Frankly her personality could do with some work. Sounds like yours is the same.

Here endeth the lesson

Fwiw I am still in my pyjamas and creaking about swearing about my sciatica which is turning me into a bitter crone

MI, I think most of us feel less gorgeous than we were in our twenties - I am now taking pleasure in how gorgeous DD looks whilst trying to camouflage my wobbly bits.
It also must be very hard to be self-employed in a business which is changing rapidly and so less opportunities for you. Even if you are very good at it. Which you are.
Do you also think that as a high academic achiever you perceive that others have higher expectations of you? I have never felt that anyone has put high expectations on me, so consequently everything I have done has felt like an achievement IYSWIM!

Re indecisiveness, it seems to be something that DH is increasingly suffering from. I tend to go with my instincts (after a bit of deliberation, of course) rather than weigh up every possibility. It's the same in our house, if I don't (or put a rocket up DH's arse) then nothing gets done!

I am feeling a bit jaded as DD and her mate didn't appear back till after 12 and woke me up (bad parents, not waiting up!) but am loving the sun. Sadly we will probably be inside this afternoon for DS's footy presentation thing.

Maybe the fact that my DM is a small, round, very far from glam thing (has looked 80 since she was 20) helps me feel better about myself too! That and a bit of pampering - spa-days, hairdressers, nails, etc are great ways to give yourself a boost

MI you ARE fab - super-smart, VERY funny, incredibly insightful, caring, and amazing all round. And very striking looking with beautiful skin and hair and fabulous eyes. If I didn't

I'm so desperate to get outside to the garden, I could weep. Instead I have to do some work and also finish off sorting photos and entry forms for dd's sodding Y6 yearbook that I rashly said I would help with. I offered because the alpha mums in ds1's year decided that he didn't need to feature barely at all (even though he was the male lead in the Y6 play!) in his own yearbook, which he was about, so to avoid similar with dd, I am making sure she is pretty much on every page. Not really, but she will be central on the front cover that's fo' sho' . But I am so nice that I am scrabbling around to get a nice pic of every single child (60 of them in the year) so that no one looks at their yearbook and says "where am I?". It's a lot of work, and there are a lot of parents who, despite having been asked to send photos only of school events, are bombarding me with pictures of birthday parties and exotic holidays .

Still have had a nice few days with lunch out and lovely theatre trip with posh meal and party afterwards yesterday.

Will get a couple of hours outside later, I'm sure.

MI - agree with others. You do a fabulous job and should be proud of everything you are and have. I am also pinning my hopes on an interesting late-blooming career, so don't lose heart about that possibility, it's all still out there. I also think dh regards my writing as irrelevant scribbles, but that is probably my projection rather than his actual attitude. Men are just very concrete beings, if they can't hold it or see it finished, they don't really feel a thing is significant. It's not that they think it's bad, they just don't feel it exists. It's their loss, really, not being able to embrace possibility.

MI I truly sympathise. I need to make some decisions, right or wrong. Being stuck on endless mental treadmills is wearing me down.

I keep thinking I should postpone the decisions till I feel better but that's taking too long . What has helped in the past is remembering that there's no need to get everything right. My best will have to be good enough. Yours is probably better than good enough.

Managed to find a spot in the sun un bar area of sports club but can now see my legs need shaving Lucky Im blonde!

MI, I hope you have got out by now - even if without the family, possibly definitely without the family. I completely know that feeling of being stuck, with an undercurrent of panic, and it is horrible.

Agree with Lalsy - why don't you book the India tickets - one thing done. And leave the rest. And ignore Mr Inferior - bloody cheek.

Perhaps a crepey meet up is in order? x

Thank you all I did indeed go out - we went for wholesome picnic and then they dropped me in Bromley and I found some shoes - a pair of v pleasing tan brogues for an even more pleasing twenty-eight (28, xxviii) of your English pounds in Next boys' dept. M&S boys dept also doing v nice red or yellow suede Converse dupes for around £20 for the smaller of foot among us.

You are all v kind. DP doesn't mean to be actually nasty - though the effect can feel like it; it is also the case that he is deeply uncomfortable with my subject matter in the first place. He'd really rather I wrote about something - anything - else. Re the looks thing: it's not so much a case of fading as never feeling remotely happy with them in the first place (I have always been absolutely amazed if anyone's ever been prepared to shag me) though the trollery is particularly acute at the moment.

You are right, I need to coordinate with the friend I'm travelling with and book India tickets. And I also need to get back to writing my own stuff. I was doing an hour first thing, between 8.30 and 9.30 and I need to resume it so I'll do that tomorrow.

It really isn't that awful a book.

Also once I've booked flights to Chennai quite a lot is sorted.

I have those M&S boots in red MI :) and dp has them in yellow (for his birthday) - I can see him pinching the red when he grows a bit more.....

Here it was a Family fun day at the local theological college - and open air pool!

Presentation and ref done, website - no.....

Sorry ds!! (Dp's feet are way too big....)

Feeling a little less sympathy, MI, since noticing picture of you looking rather glamorous on FB . That mismatch between how you feel and how others see you isn't always much comfort, though (ime).

Glad you are feeling a bit better, MI. This is my first visit since this morning and I have been wondering how you were. May I ask what your book is about? Agree with everyone that booking the India trip would be a good move (you know you're worth it ).

We have done hours of work in the garden and parts of it are now looking quite good. DH was doing the easy work, like planting his tomatoes, leaving me doing the wretched weeding.

BD feeling jealous of the fab FB photos of the open air pool at the er... theological college.

NU, do you do FB? Then we could see your garden

The theological college used to be a private girls school hence all the facilities! They are great, let ds's school use the full equipped theatre, have a shop which means you can get a pint without driving anywhere and do these open days - and no hard sell on the god front :)

And yes MI you look stunning in that photo...

BTM, no - I have always kept away from it. I don't know, it sort of makes me feel uncomfortable.

I have a widowed friend who lives in the Midlands who has the most marvellous garden and she is coming to stay in June for a few days, so I'm trying to bring the garden up to scratch.

MI I see you've got some shoes, which is good. And had a row which is bad, I'm sorry. I've been meaning to link to a company who make beautiful soft leather shoes. I've been swanking around in sandals from them. www.shoeembassy.com/ They are not on the website but are beigey and strappy and flat and zippy with a closed back that means my crepey heels can remain a secret. They are really walkable in too. Not sure whether they do online sales yet but London folks can see their wares at Brick lane, Greenwich and Spitalfields markets plus Camden stables at weekends.

Hatty and Mrs S, plus anyone else, I'm off with DDs of 12 and 9 and DH to Paris at half term. Their first time. Our 4th. (DH cupped me under the bottom to get me up the steps to Sacre Coeur when pg with DD1 and I used every loo we passed at 1 franc a shot!) Would love your thoughts on what they might enjoy that we might not have thought of.

Ooooh. Take them to the Jardin d'Acclimatation for a little light relief from tourist sites. (Although there is a convenient little play area near Notre Dame.) Eat at Chartier. Mine loved the Musee d'Orsay, and also the Pompidou. Take a Bateaubus, jump on and jump off - Paris looks very different from the river. Will think some more. Disneyland?

What is this cockery? 5:2, ish, minimal carbs, apart from wine, and I've put ON three pounds since Friday. My belly is hard and bloated. And my boobs are vast and painful. I could be four months pregnant. Except I'm not.

Is it all lady jogging, joyless carb-free existence and no wine from now on? I suppose as a penniless student I won't be able to afford to eat... < grasps straws >

Athletics competition this afternoon, and my boy done good! He was shaking with nerves when we turned up, didn't want to run, but managed to win his 100m heat and put in a good time, then did the 200m relay where he managed to overtake the lad in front and bring the team in second. I was very proud of him. He didn't get his sporting talent from me, that's for sure.

We are going to have to buy him some proper running spikes, though. He's been using DH's, which are nearly 30 years old (DH competed at national level at 100m back in the day, and stored the shoes in his "memory box" in the loft, never expecting them to be called back into service).

We came home and had a lovely BBQ and watched the sunset. Hands up who's looking forward to going to work tomorrow? Anyone?