Beauty Hall of shame (the thread that will NOT make you spend money)

[Pinkglow]

Ok so after now ordering new foot buffers and looking into moroccan oil I just wondered if there were any beauty products that you really hate and would not recommend. Sorry if this has been done before, I did do a search.

Mine is benefit some kind-a-gorgeous foundation. Ended up purchasing this after wandering into one of their stores where the women would looked like she was caked in it slapped it all over my face catching me rather unawares. Admittedly the primer I also purchased is actually quite nice but the foundation is not exactly subtle and ended up looking like Ive caked it on. Plus it didnt last very long for the price.

I've always thought Primers are complete bollocks. They're supposed to make your makeup 'last longer'. How long do you want it to last - all week you skank?

Body scrubs or Skin Polishers. Complete waste. You might as well scrub yourself with a handful of salt mixed with olive oil. Better still get those scrubby gloves for £2.99

Face Serums with names like Youth Active Hydra Compleximente that come in a space age dispenser.

Anti shine products - milk of magnesia is much better.

I can't believe mineral makeup is getting slagged off here - although Urban Decay stuff is the best (and I tried a LOT).

My worsts have all been (ridiculously expensive) Bliss, promise the world and deliver absolutely nothing. Oh and all those extra Dermalogica products that they convince you that you really really need - useless!

Pseudonymity - try Crystal. No white marks, no smell if you get the plain one, no stinging when you shave your armpits and it definitely works! I used to get it from Whole Foods but not sure where else in the UK you can get it.

I love my Bare Minerals make-up. You do have to really buff it in to get great results, and I can see that if buffing isn't an option (because your skin is too sensitive) then you will just end up with a face full of powder.

Agree on body scrubs - scrubby gloves actually work better. And ditto face exfoliators - I do hot cloth cleansing with Tesco muslins. Way better and cheaper.

Expensive mascaras and lipglosses - completely pointless.

I've never yet met a skin mask that could look you in the eye. Oh, I tell a lie - Marcella Borghese used to do one, a green mud in a big glass pot. It was expensive but HUGE and lasted at least a year. That really did the trick. Everything else - all these poncy white creams that are basically souped-up moisturiser - like throwing your money into the wind.

Oh, Bliss Spa. Like Benefit, a triumph of marketing over product.

And as an offshoot of Bliss Spa - Fitflops. Clearly about as much use at toning your bum as shouting, 'Tone, you arse!' at it twice a day, but at least they're comfortable.

I've never found a face mask that's made a noticeable difference to my skin either; I used to go for Guinot Hydrodermie facials once a month, on the basis that I couldn't roll my own face with electrodes at home, but to be honest the best thing about them was the shoulder massage.

pmsl@'tone, you arse!'

mac foundation,
looked great on me in the shop... orange when i got home.. and it really makes your eyes sting if you get any near it.. horrid stuff

Benefit concealer is absolute crap. The one that I have is super drying and makes me look even older.

Bobbi Brown concealer is bloody awful too. You look like a Warholesque panda with it on and then, because it's so fecking greasy, it picks up stray colour from your mascara so you look weird and knackered.

Is that the skincare that Katy Perry fronts? Sounds v good! [makes notes] I think my problem is that my skin's basically OK, apart from a touch of rosacea, and I felt for £45 a time I should come out looking actively more beautiful, rather than just a bit cleaner.

And OJON! It's horrible, lank-making stuff!
Genefique - saw no difference
Nars Multiple in South Beach - "a makeup bag staple"... er, if you want to look like the Artful Dodger or some other grubby urchin who hasn't seen a flannel in years
And all those 'no white marks' deodorants - yeah, right.

This is v cathartic.

I hate the stench of 8 hour cream and it just reminds me of vaseline, SIL swears by it so I am glad it's not just me that thinks it's rank.

Primer works well for me as I have pores the size of moon craters and it helps disguise them.

Nivea Q10 was greasy nasty shite.
Don't like garnier as a general rule.

Clinique 3 step system - Soap, Paint Stripper and Yellow Goo

Awful and gave me acne, however, people thought since I like Clinique they should buy me more 3 step shite. Only when I began sobbing did my MIL/Mum realise that I loathed these products

Max Factor Lip stain - OK, was only a pound on offer but still felt cheated...

Clinique skincare is awful. Their lipsticks are fantastic, though.

Clarins, by contrast, does fabulous skincare and hideous lipsticks.

Yes Devora

I am devoted to most other Clinique products which is why parentals kept stocking me up with the skincare stuff.....

Burts Bees soapbark and chamomile cleansing cream....really? I thought the only ingredients were paint stripper. Took my face about a month to recover from that one...
Clinique's 'Dramatically Average' moisturiser (Olay with yellow food colouring?)
Any 'special' range claiming to reduce redness...I'm talking about you, Dermalogica / No7 / Clinique/ Origins / Roche Posay / Vichy etc etc etc.....
Any pencil eyeliner that claims to be smudge and waterproof...I must have spent thousands trying to find 'the one'. I haven't.
All Mac's powder eyeshadows and lipsticks...that last..ooh at least half an hour. Even with primer.

Mario Badescu special healing powder -
Yellow caking effect, anyone? And a puff that doesn't fit the lid! Powder explosion every time the poor, squashed on lid is unscrewed. So the yellow caking also extends to my clothes!

Love most of Lush's stuff..but the Cynthia Sylvia Stout shampoo gave me bad dermititis along my hairline. Gave it to friend and it did the same to her...not to mention the raw forehead burn we both got....

clinique clarifying lotion,,,,,removing nail varnish has never been so easy

Snail gel from holland and barrett. It's mostly alcohol gel! I took it back though as it gave me a rash.

I think the lesson here is that some products suit you and others dont. And you cant tell until you have handed over £30.

Apart from maybelline great lash. It's rubbish.

OMG Snail Gel! I was going to post about that after spotting it for the first time today in H&B. I don't think I could knowingly rub snail slime into my face!

God yes,the Burt's Bees face wash cleanser thingy...felt like I'd cleansed my face with Vicks Vaporub.

Just remembered Olay regenerist bla bla yadda yadda. Might as well have used a £3 Aldi one or a £60 posh one,cos the £25 Olay one was shite.

Lancome Juicy tubes! Can't understand the hype! Just as gloopy and hair attracting as a normal lipgloss a fraction of the price.

Ysl mascara - the one in the gold tube- clumpy stealing crap.
Naked shampoo and conditioner- Greece fest.
Benefit

snail gel left me with smarting red skin and watering eyes