This is very very funny and great pics!
Also very pre-judgey. I'm guessing last summer left you lot with PTS (post-linen-trouser traumatic stress).
I have a pair of black linen 3/4 trousers, a pair of full-length bum-tastic sage green Jigsaw trousers I'm hoping to squeeeeze back into, 3 pairs of 3/4 length GAP chinos, and 2 pairs of the most gorgeous white cropped jeans that I will be wearing proudly with bright red toe-nails & flip-flops (and invisible well-fitting knickers underneath). I am lucky. I have a little bum, slim calves & ankles, and a full-length mirror.