what item of clothing do you look a TWAT in?

[withagoat]

( and how)
me polonecks ( inverted funnel)
long straight skirts ( amish)

Think I may be lubeybooby's body double, judging by her list. Nah, more like Humpty Dumpty's actually.

I do wear skinny jeans but only with boots so that my even skinnier lower legs/ankles are hidden.

Thought I looked ok in a maxi dress but was asked when the baby was due

How am I supposed to wear fitted tops that don't make me look pregnant?

Averyone looks a twat in:

Hareem pants with a dropped crotch
Crocs (except kids)
Those fleecy jackets with pictures of dogs on
Jack Wills stuff if you are older than 17

And Per Una stuf is twat personified.

those peg shaped trousers. I am an hourglass(ish) and my (really not huge)arse looks like a rhino's

shirt dresses - look horrendous.

agree on florals. I am embracing abstract florals though - much easier to wear.

I walk into shops and dismiss instantly 80% of their offerings. Is depressing but less depressing than taking all the "fashionable" stuff into the cubicle with blind optimism and then weeping over how shite I look in it all.

anything 'ethnic' or involving the words 'tribal'

left to my own devices i would happily raze every single 'East' store to the ground

Denim skirts ....no idea why, but they've always made me look like a two bob hooker

Hate floral "tea dress" type things too too, but I could probably wear them - just wouldn't be seen dead

I had an unfortunate incident with a maxi skirt.

Oh Gawd & DEFINITELY Crocs ......shudders ....do love my flip flop version though as pure comfort, so I can see why people get sucked in by them

I also confess an addiction to Breton
Am buying them and trying them in all tops
All I need now is some onions and a beret and my look would be taken over that fine style line from chic to fancy dress

Oh and anything animal print. Not even a scarf. I'd look like Bet Lynch.

short skirts/shorts - I have terrible terrible knees battered with scars from operations and flabby with lack of use. Never ever show my knees. It's like they don't exist.

not clothing actually but lipstick-I look ridiculous as if I'm dressing up as my mother

anyhting 'bohemian'

long skirts, I look like a man in his wifes clothes

off the shoulder tops, have very wide shoulders

anything with a 'ditsy' small print. I have a shirt dress like this and it makes me feel peculiar when ever I wear it

Me too for polo necks and hate hate long skirts
Belts apart from on jeans or low slung in the 80s
Anorak-y coats because with boobs looks so mumsy
Over feminine things too ruffley or flowery
Do look ok in harems though and wear them a lot!
Any sort of hair 'do' makes me look 80
eyeshadow apart from neutral
chunky look at me I'm bohemian jewellery

dungarees. total Mario Bros.

I like my skinny jeans when I'm out with nice boots and a long jumper, but as soon as I get indoors and take off the boots I look like my granny.

Shorts - I look like Lofty from It Ain't Half Hot Mum.

Polo necks, and smock tops - I look awful in those. Plus 'floaty' skirts/dresses.
I really wanted to be able to wear harems, they look so comfy. Alas every pair I've tried so far just look silly.
If anyone spots any that would look good on a 5ft pear shape, I'm all ears...