Yes yes it's a Disney one...

[Disney11]

Wondering if you think this will cause a problem?

I want to take DS to Disneyland Paris for a short stay (2 nights) for his birthday. The only way it's affordable is to go outside of the school holidays so would mean no DSC. DS isn't in school yet hence why it's possible.

I'm thinking it's fine for two reasons:

• I'm happy to go alone without DH if he feels he can't come.

• DSC have been to Disneyland Paris a few years ago with their mum so this isn't any different surely?

Given DSC ages I wouldn't even think twice, your child will want the "child" experience not the big ride one. And they've been before so not like it's a trip of a lifetime they are missing out on.

i think it’s fine, just depends how your DH feels on whether he wants to go too or not.

thinking about it from your DH’s POV, I have a 10 yr old with ex and a toddler with DP. I’d never stop DP from doing anything with toddler but I honestly couldn’t go on holiday with them and leave my older DS out. However, he doesn’t get taken on holiday by his dad so perhaps that changes things.

It's what you'd do if they were all your biological children

It’s completely irrelevant and not the same.

I’m a mum of 4. My children are 3, 7, 9 and 11. So quite a big range of ages there. As a mum, I would plan Disney for all of them. You muddle through the tricky bits as best you can. It wouldn’t be easy. But I would also really enjoy it because they’re my kids.

I don’t see why OP should place herself in the same position as someone like me “just because”. She’s a mum of one child, and the things she does on her own with her child should reflect that. Why should she juggle two different ages when she doesn’t have to? It changes the dynamics massively.

Whether their mum can afford it or not is neither here nor there really. They still have a mother and it's not their step mother. They still have the potential of doing things with their mother that their half siblings don't do. There's absolutely nothing wrong with their half siblings having the same opportunity to do things with their mum by themselves. Saying 'what if they were yours' is silly, they aren't and the situation is entirely different

I didn’t say if they were yours. I commented that the DSC have a mum they can do things with is a convenient way to look at things. The OP has a partner, mum may not. The OP may be affording this because some one else is helping pick up the slack at home. Mum may not have that privilege. And it is a privilege. I also said I don’t believe the OP is doing anything wrong but I do think there is a need to be careful - generally speaking - saying the DSC can do it (whatever it may be) when the circumstances in separate households are rarely ever the same. In that OPs case, she is safe in the knowledge her DSC have already been to Disney. It would be more complex if they hadn’t.

But this doesn't matter if they'll enjoy it at the time.
Or should we only ever do something with older children?

I think if your DH has never taken his older kids somewhere special on holiday he shouldn't go with you.
He shouldn't be taking 1 child to special places when he never takes or has never taken the others.
To pre-teens/young teens, it doesn't matter who's paying. They see dad doing nice things for the new sibling which he didn't do with them, which means they're being replaced. That's how this age group feels.

You should go with your DS and have a lovely time. But DH should only go if he has done similar in the past with the older ones or is going to take the older ones somewhere himself.

Their mum is honestly irrelevant here.

Go & have the best time x