I usually plan my Xmas day a year in advance. My DC alternates Xmas/ NY between me and DCs Dad.
Last year was awful so I suggested to my DP’s ex we do a joint Xmas day, DC and SDC hadn’t seen much of each other due to covid. I’ve been with DP 4 years all get along.
As it happened by the time Xmas 2020 rolled around me and DP were living together. So we hosted DPs ex and SDC at ours.
It was a little difficult as by now it has become apparent the amicable relationship between DP and his ex was really only due to him constantly giving into her.
But I put brave face on it and we all had a good time.
I’ve been asking DP since last Xmas to sort out Xmas plans going forward. Of course he’s not, a few months ago I said stop pretending you have any option you are clearly just going to go to ex’s house on Xmas day. Apart from 2020 this has been their habit since splitting 8 years ago.
All year he was adamant he would go for a few hours and not eat dinner.
We’ll now he’s going to have dinner with ex her parents and DSC before returning home. This means we won’t have dinner together.
It also means I’m alone for bulk of Xmas day. I feel very sad.
DP doesn’t want DSC to have 2 xmas days, but will happily to take part when my DC is having Xmas day with me on 28th. DSC will also be with us then.
Is this normal to go to your ex after so many years?
We don’t have a joint dc and won’t , so it’ll never be an issue in that sense. But next year my DC will be here for xmas. There’s no possibility to split that day or for them to alternate his ex has been very clear she won’t do this.
Sorry just wanted to get it off my chest.