Birthday Palava

[GloomAndDoom]

Hi, DH is stressing me out but I'm not sure if he has a point or if he's being silly.

Next weekend he has the DSC it is their mum's boyfriend's birthday and so his kids are all going round and having a big meal. She has asked if DSC can get dropped back for Sunday lunch so they can join in.

I kind of thought fair enough as you know, that's their family too. But DH isn't happy as he doesn't feel mum's boyfriend's family birthdays should trump his contact time.

Contact time is being constantly eroded with mum dropping off later and later (and refusing to switch so he does pick up). She is even refusing his offers to do both journeys. There are also often request to drop them off a bit earlier so they can see boyfriend's kids before they go back to their mums. He's offered to switch weekends but aparantly that won't work for them as they don't have enough beds for them all to be in one house at the same time.

I'm getting fed up with DH moping and say to him just either say no it doesn't work for him or just do what she asks so the kids can see the other part of their family. But if I say to just do it he says they spend little time here as it is.

Any advice? Or just tell him I don't mind and leave me out of it?!

I don't think you can take the piss of you genuinely feel shit though.
It's not intentional is it.

If you**

@Pinkspecs

I don't think you can take the piss of you genuinely feel shit though. It's not intentional is it.

We'll have to agree to disagree on that one. Some people are prone to moping and allow it to take over far too much, this forum is littered with threads where the OP is advised to step away from family members or friends who are draining the life out of them with their emotional baggage and expectation for others to see them through and listen whenever they feel the need it (too often). If you look at threads about genuinely depressed people, you will see that even there, there is a limit on what people can take, even spouses.

I really think he should add on time at the end of the going home day each and every time she is late and say no to early drop offs.

He could just send a simple message "You were 2 hours late dropping off so I'll add them on to today. See you at 7pm." Then not engage with any demanding from her.

When you let people walk over you they just take the piss more and more.