What is the worst thing your DH's ex has ever done?

[Itlod1982]

For anyone with a DH with a spiteful or crazy ex what is the worst thing they've ever said or done to you?

My DSD has announced that her DM told her to suggest more one on one time with her dad without me around.
To be clear she hasn't said she wants this, she said her mum told her to say it!

Or what's the number one thing she does to wind you up?

I need a bit of light hearted relief tonight so any replies would be appreciated... serious...funny....whacky..

Wow these are all so sad, poor children :(
They all completely resonate with me, we have been through so much that I’m sure I actually have some sort of ptsd / anxiety from having to deal with my DH’s extremely manipulative ex

Not me, but my friend - her DH has a DD and his ex takes the prize. She cheated on him repeatedly before dumping him a week before their wedding for another man, then told him on what would have been their wedding day she was pregnant and didn’t know who the father was so they had to do the whole DNA thing, then decided she didn’t want the baby before she even left the hospital, leaving him to be a single dad, would have custody one day every other weekend but only if he brought the baby to her because she liked her lie ins.....

my friend and her DH have been together since the DD was 2 and she’s now 9, and the ex still has no interest in seeing the child more often but sends constant texts to my friend and her DH demanding they buy the DD fancier trainers, a new laptop, an Apple Watch - anything she thinks can go ‘missing’ on her visits that she can sell, I suppose!

Threatened to put a brick through the window where my newborn was sleeping.

Left threatening voicemails ranging from saying I’m a cow who breaks up families to DH and her are still together and having amazing sex. On the same day rang DH to say I am cheating on him. All bollocks.

Stamped on DSCs toys.

She ended the relationship, years before I met him. DSC has very little contact with her now.

so many......telling everyone I'd split up her happy family (she cheated on him 3 years before I met him)
when found out I was pregnant, lost her shit, tried to use DSC as leverage-she made him choose between me and bump or her and DSC. He chose us then went to solicitors for contact to continue
tried to demand our child wasn;t to share a room with DSC-they were to sleep in the kennel like the dog they were
saw my dad coming to visit, called my dh to tell him I had a strange man visiting while he was at work (was advised not to judge people by her own sloppy standards)
called dh constantly to go round to fix things for DSC whilst current boyfriend was there
buggered off abroad leaving DSC with us then returned and went out on piss for a week
joined the same gym I went to, became best friends with instructor who then treated me like shit
emotionally manipulates DSC into making decisions. or tries to. every year or so, she tries to go from 50/50 to DSC coming here every other weekend. Last time DSC ended up ill and in counselling so back to 50/50
screams she is primary carer at DH (she isn't)
still calls/pms DH to tell him I'm upsetting DSC. again. DSC tells us its not true. I don't get involved.
Tried consistently to turn DSC against DH and I.
I could go on. she's a horror!-never says no to DSC-favours them above her younger resident kids.
she clearly still loves DH as always flirting and watching him (her poor fiancee). she still calls dh to report her non-child related dramas. when we met, it was like someone had taken her fave toy. spiteful, nasty woman. We are civil now but I'll never forgive her for what she did. I ended up with PND thanks to her nastiness.
DSC know none of this, I always try and be kind. poor kids didnt ask to be in this situation. Sometimes though ther mothers lies really make me angry and I have to walk away.

My DH’s ex tried to cancel the step kid’s passports by reporting them lost/damaged (can’t remember which) Anyway, the passport office called DH, as he was the one who made the original application for the passports, and he verified that they were not lost and definitely not damaged. They declined her application for new passports and have noted it on their system apparently that she’s tried this and to contact DH first if a similar thing happens. However, what’s so cruel about this is that she did this so close to our holiday date that we wouldn’t have been able to get replacement passports for them had she succeeded. She would have actually made her children miss out on their holiday just to try and get one over on us. It made me sad rather than angry to be honest.

@MrsPworkingmummy

Where do I start? DH and I have been together 13 years now. Dh's ex was horrendous for around 8/9 years, and is now just mildy bitter and bitchy. I want to stress I waited over 2 year before meeting dsd too. She literally told DH should would 'destroy him'. We got the police involved and now have no contact. Dsd is 17 now so everything is organised through her.

1. told dsd (then 4 or 5) I had stole her dad. Also that her dad had stolen items from their house when he moved out and took bags of his clothes and an old bed frame. She still now, today, tells anyone who will listen that I stole him and am the worst person alive in the world

2. told dsd her surname would be changing to ex's maiden name. We had to go to court as hadn't given permission for this. Dsd wrote her new surname on school books, clothing etc and it was awfully confusing

3. constantly cancelled and chopped/changed contact. Would tell dsd dad had cancelled on her when she knew he was out with me (on a non contact night)

4. when dsd was with us, ex wouild phone up constantly demanding information such as where dsd was sitting at the dining table. She was not, under any circumstances, allowed to sit next to me or she was f*ing kill me. I was not allowed to answer the door to our home if dsd was dropped off or dsd would be taken back. She told Dsd I was dangerous and she wasn't to play with me. That was awful as Dsd and I got on really well.

5. when we bought a house together and were taking dsd to see it she said 'mummy' s already showed me the house on the ipad. She's told me which bedroom is going to be mine'

6. when our DD was born, dsd was only to refer to the baby as 'that child' because 'she'd be treated like jesus or something and would get all the attention'

7. she spread awful rumours about my lovely parents in law in order to 'destroy' DH

8. contacted our employer to say we should be sacked as DH is a cradle snatcher (I'm 18 years younger) and it was not appropriate for us to be together

9. when DD was born she was one of the first to phone the hospital to give a sinister and sarcastic congratulations. No idea how she knew DD had been born.

10. would send us messages saying she knew where we were

11. if dh and I were having a weekend away, she'd phone constantly

12. would text Dsd asking for info about our house/wedding/holidays. Dsd would often take videos and photos of our house and life 'to show mummy'

Ex wife is a head teacher and the way she manipulated her daughter in the early years was truly awful. Especially for someone in that profession.

She sounds like a complete crack pot

DHXW spread lies about me to make herself look better - she left him for another man while she was pregnant with DSD. By the time DH and I started seeing each other (2 years later) she was married to the OM and expecting their first DC.

This doesn't paint her in a very good light though, so when DSD started nursery she told the other mums a full-on sob story that DH had left her for me while she was pregnant. The first time DH and I did nursery pickup they all blanked us.

Luckily for me though, a few weeks later my DSIL's BFF started her DC at the same nursery and set the record straight for us, cue many apologies from the other mums. DSD's 16 now and I'm still good friends with some of them.

Once told us she would be picking DSD (then 3 or 4) up from us on Sunday morning as she was going to a party, but when we got to her house to drop DSS off on Sunday evening it turned out she'd actually gone on holiday for a fortnight with her sister (taking DSD).

I'm sensing a theme here. so many ex wives claiming the stepmum is the OW when they're not. Its good to know I'm not the only one struggling with a bitter ex.
I think @MrsPworkingmummy wins the thread though. Thats pretty serious.
DH Ex used to have a spare key to our home and would let herself in like she owned the place! Serious boundaries were implicated by DH after that day!
It does get better over time, just have to keep pushing back. and count the days till DSC are 18!!

@BigPaperBag thinking back, I sometimes can't believe I spent my 20s going through that, allowing her to spout a vicious diatribe and undermine the fact I'm a fairly nice and genuine person . She's a Headteacher and National Leader in Education so thinks she's untouchable. She used to throw around the term 'safeguarding' to intimidate. If it wasn't for the fact I'm fairly successful in education myself and have a number of people behind me who know our version of events is true, I'd hate to think the damage she would have caused.

Not me but a friend found out his ex was telling the children that his new wife was poisoning him and wanted to poison the children too. The children were hysterical at any mention of contact. It all came out in a cafcass assessment and he became the primary carer within weeks.

Called my DH utterly devastated and in a panic that their 4yo (at the time) was vomiting blood and at the hospital... he in a panic drove from my house (we were having date night....) he got to the hospital and asked the receptionist to direct him to her... she wasn't there... he tried to call her mum back again and she didn't answer so he called her sister to make sure he was at the right hospital .... turns out she wasn't ill or hospitalised at all... her mother was on a night out and thought it would be funny!

Then a year later told her five year old to tell me "mummy and daddy had sex last week" .... they definitely did not 🤣

We got SD a kiddiconnect for Xmas (she is 9 now) so she can safely message us when she's at her mums house because her mum never responds when we ask how she is... our 5 year old her half brother was hospitalised in Feb with intestinal malrotation, she had been texting to say she misses me and hopes her brother is okay then went quiet for afew hours, then I started getting really strange messages making jokes about the 5 year old dying.... when we asked her about it the next time we saw her she had no idea what we were talking about.

I wish I was joking but I'm not. I'm not this overbearing stepmum, infact I don't refer to myself as that ever... I'm daddy's wife and I'm her friend, there's no back story, he didn't meet me whilst they were together, we met 3 years after they split up. Nothing I do is ever good enough for her. But it's good enough for my stepdaughter and she regularly tells me we are bestest friends and she loves me so much, so that keeps me going 💗💗💗💗💗

I have lived with soon to be husband over 7 years, he had been divorced 2 years when we met. He told me ex wife is unpleasant but I like to make my mind up about people myself. Initially she was polite and civil to me until she realised the relationship was serious. She has ensured there is no real relationship between my DP and his DD now (all be it they are older teens). I obviously was not OW, have never fallen out with her or DD but somehow I have become a hate figure. I have been accused of being a gold digger DP is older then me, however, I am actually more financially stable then him and on paper far wealthier. I think if he had stayed single living alone that would have been fine by her (he left her after years of misery) the fact he has moved on and is happy is what grates. I’m aware she would have been like this with whomever he met or married but it is very very hard sometimes, not what I signed up for

Some of these stories are so sad! Personally I can't wait until my ex finds a new partner so he'll leave me the hell alone....

Kidnapped their eldest child from dh's custody... twice

@AJB3001

Called my DH utterly devastated and in a panic that their 4yo (at the time) was vomiting blood and at the hospital... he in a panic drove from my house (we were having date night....) he got to the hospital and asked the receptionist to direct him to her... she wasn't there... he tried to call her mum back again and she didn't answer so he called her sister to make sure he was at the right hospital .... turns out she wasn't ill or hospitalised at all... her mother was on a night out and thought it would be funny!

Then a year later told her five year old to tell me "mummy and daddy had sex last week" .... they definitely did not 🤣

We got SD a kiddiconnect for Xmas (she is 9 now) so she can safely message us when she's at her mums house because her mum never responds when we ask how she is... our 5 year old her half brother was hospitalised in Feb with intestinal malrotation, she had been texting to say she misses me and hopes her brother is okay then went quiet for afew hours, then I started getting really strange messages making jokes about the 5 year old dying.... when we asked her about it the next time we saw her she had no idea what we were talking about.

I wish I was joking but I'm not. I'm not this overbearing stepmum, infact I don't refer to myself as that ever... I'm daddy's wife and I'm her friend, there's no back story, he didn't meet me whilst they were together, we met 3 years after they split up. Nothing I do is ever good enough for her. But it's good enough for my stepdaughter and she regularly tells me we are bestest friends and she loves me so much, so that keeps me going 💗💗💗💗💗

Horrific! What a nightmare. At least you’ve got a lovely SD to make it worth it.

Absolutely! She is amazing, I couldn't love her more ❤