Hi. I have posted elsewhere on MN a little in the past but this is a new name as previous posts might out me. This is a bit long, I'm trying not to drip feed but I want some perspective and advice. Also a vent.
DP's ex and some of her family (her sister and her husband I think) have developed some sort of obsession with me and how much money I earn and how suitable she thinks I am to be around her kids. As far as I'm aware this is recent, although she knew DP was seeing me before he told her because one of her friends was 'keeping an eye on him"! They'd been split for 3 years when I met him, she'd been married for a year! I've seen seeing him for about 2 years.
Basicly she thinks a. DP is committing some sort of fraud to avoid paying maintainace - he isn't, he's just been out of work for ages after being hit by a car - and I'm helping him do it somehow.
b. I'm out of line for saying DSD1 isn't to be left alone in my house for a second and that 'prevents him from seeing his kids'. DSD1 (12) has serious behavioural problems - stealing, hurting animals, hurting her little sister, breaking things, is a school bully etc so this is non negotiable. DP doesn't even live with me half the week (looks after terminally ill relative in his home town the other days), having them at mine was just to save them a long drive to his, as I live just outside the town ex moved to, he lives about an hour away. Hardly stopping him seeing them.
She's started bothering DP for more money, asking him why he/we can afford XYZ if he's not earning, accusing him of spending his money on me, working cash in hand and giving it to me, using me as a fake company director etc. I only know all this because DP left Facebook logged in on my laptop and I didn't realise until I opened her message (I've blocked her but she's got a similar name to someone I know so it didn't twig for a second).
She's also decided because I was 'weird' at school and college that I can't have unsupervised time with the kids. This has happened only twice! The second time DP went to pick DSD1 up late from a friend's and I took DSD2 and my niece over to see my 2 Shetland ponies. DSD1 went nuts over this and then suddenly I'm not allowed near the kids alone, I'm weird, I'm an alcoholic, It's favouritism, I'm nasty to DSD1, and so on. DP did tell me this himself. She's also recent got a new in her bonnet about them not having bedrooms here - I don't have enough rooms in the house!
She asks my sister intrusive questions about me when she sees her ( she went to school with my sis for a few years before she moved to DPs town and DSD2 went to the same nursery as my niece when she came back) and makes comments about what I've sold off my website and how much money I must be making and how I can't possibly afford my house and the like, comments on seeing me out in town, what I've posted on instagram etc.
I've seen a car driving up and down the same kerb crawling outside my house a few times - I think it's ex's sister. A neighbour told me someone was outside taking pictures a few days ago which freaked me out.
DP has told her to knock it off numerous times but she's threatened to take him to court to stop access.
I'm not sure if this warrants police involvement? Or if I should wait until they get bored? We're moving next year but that seems so far away right now.
I'm getting really irritated and DP is getting stressed at her constant bothering about me and court threats.