DSD has decided to be vegetarian

[Iamnotagoddess]

We have 6 kids between us 3 have now left home.

DSD who is 14 has decided to be a vegetarian.

Tbh I feel really pissed off (secretly, I would not vocalise this).

I work full time and DH travels a long way to get them so I always prepare the meals and we are a real “meat eating” family and I am not used to cooking veggie meals (I do things to feed a lot of people like Lasange, Cottage Pie) and am not keen on using substitute meat for everyone and haven’t got time to piss about with a separate meal, but obviously can’t insist DSD eats meat although she does go through a lot of fads.

How have others found solutions to this?

I only said “phase” because she is the type of child who has a lot of phases, hobbies she doesn’t stick at etc.

We taught her to ride a bike and she has a bike here she moans if a bike ride is suggested.

They couldn’t swim so we paid for swimming lessons and took them swimming regularly, she won’t go swimming. She wanted to learn the keyboard so we bought her one and paid for lessons, she didn't practice and gave up it’s a pattern of behaviour (I know it’s the same with a lot of kids) that’s why I said phase.

Fair enough. I didn't stick to several phases but I did stick to being veggie.

I always liked M&S veggie ready meals so maybe get some of those in.

At times it is hard being a veggie when others are catering. Even in 2019 my extended family don't always respect or understand my choices. My PILs had a Bbq last year. There wasn't one veggie option even though they know I'm veggie and we even checked before and the thought would have been basic consideration (I always get their favourites in). If they had just put one item out for me that gesture would have gone a long way. One of their GC is also veggie and there was nothing for the teen. Fortunately, I had taken some veg sausage sandwiches with me (as PILs have not catered for me before) which we both shared from my Tupperware!

They do Linda McCartney meals in Iceland I will get some in.

It’s jut irritating and then I worry Simone else will want special meals.

It’s jut irritating and then I worry Simone else will want special meals
In that case just make the veggie meal as close to the main meal.
Mash sausage and beans was our lazy quick tea, that looks virtually the same veggie or meat, same with stir fry, roast dinners etc

I have the opposite here. I'm vegetarian, DH is not but prefers to eat vegetarian and I have a DS who I'm not raising as vegetarian (he's not yet old enough to decide for himself)

Batch cooking is the way forward. It's really not difficult. Two pans on the hob - some of your base prep (onions/garlic/veg/whatever) goes into one, the rest into the main pot, then meat into main and veg alternative into the other from there. It's especially easy if she's only there a couple of nights a week as you won't even have to cook separately very often. One veggie lasagne will freeze in 4-6 portions, as will a chilli, stew, whatever. Once it's in the freezer it just needs nuking in the microwave.

Today I've had 4 pots on the hob. They have turned into shepherds pie, lamb tagine, Bolognese and cottage pie. Several portions of each in the freezer for DS and that'll last him well over a month (he eats red meat maybe once a week, twice max, fish a couple of times and veggie the rest). Didn't take long, 2 hours max including prep time (which you'll be doing for the rest of you anyway)

I'm going to go ahead and assume your own daughter went vegetarian after she'd left home.

I know how to batch cook and I know how to cook a veggie meal.

I could spend a few hours batch cooking meals and the next time they come she might be eating meat again and I will have a load of food and time wasted (although DD could have them).

I work full time as well as DH but because he is away it therefore becomes mainly my responsibility and I resent that a bit really and the fact that DSD is expecting me to cater for her phases when they never thank me for meals anyway.

And yes DD went veggie a few months ago.

She ate a Magnum today and they are not suitable for vegetarians and it’s that in top which pisses me off, she’s not taking it seriously yet expects us to cater for her.

OP i think you have recieved lots of helpful advice. I am quite shocked at your defeatist and negative attitude to the idea of eating less meat/ cooking a few veggie dishes for everyone. My flab is truly gasted

And I will call her out on it next time - she can’t make a big stand about not eating meat and then eat things which are not suitable for someone who isn’t eating meat.

@hopefulhalf

Why should I change my diet when I don’t want to for someone who isn’t even taking their own “stance” seriously?

Umm
Cheaper?
Healthier?
Greener?
Encouraging/helping DSD to stick with her vegetarianism ?

Also trying something new ?

Again - I eat meat and I refuse to justify that to anyone.

I do not want to be a vegetarian and I have a healthy diet and do not overspend on food.

Why would I encourage something I don’t believe in? Surely that’s up to her parents.

I have eaten vegetarian food in the past, I prefer a meal with meat or fish.

eatforum.org/a-weekly-planetary-health-menu/
What do you mean ?
You prefer to eat meat everyday reguardless of the longterm consequences for your health, your family's health and the planets health ?
Are you a climate change denier too ?

Eating meat or fish daily is not healthy.

It’s utterly bizarre that you can’t contemplate eating vegetarian meals every now and then - it’s diets like yours that are decimating the environment for everyone. So yes - I do expect you to have to justify that.

She's 14, she can cook for herself!
I'd just buy her veggie ready meals, and bung them in the microwave while you have your yummy shepherds pie!

What do you mean ?
You prefer to eat meat everyday reguardless of the longterm consequences for your health, your family's health and the planets health Are you a climate change denier too

I eat a perfectly healthy diet. Probably more healthy than my grandmother who also ate meat every day and lived until she was 98.

Why would I be a climate change denier? Why be so extreme?

If the meat and fish industry collapsed then what would all the people who depend on it for a living do?

It's very easy to feed both vegetarians and meat eaters at the same time.

For dishes with mince such as bolognaise , chilli, cottage pie etc. You can easily cook a batch on the side with Quorn or soy mince, and freeze a few single portions. (You'll soon build up a few single portion veggie meals in the freezer that can quickly be defrosted)

We often have wraps for dinner (with chicken) or falafel for the veggie. I put out bowls of salad, chicken, falafel, grated cheese with sauces etc. and the family build their own wraps.

When our family have burgers, vegetarian has veggie burger.

When our family have steak or pork chops etc. Vegetarian has fried halloumi or giant garlic mushrooms (so simple to do on the side) served with all the same trimmings.

Very often the whole family have a vegetarian meal, such as butternut & chickpea curry or mushroom risotto. Even though they enjoy their meat they have grown very fond of some of the vegetarian dishes I've tried.

It feels good cutting back on our meat consumption, for health and ethical reasons, the meat eaters in our family will always like their meat but we all support each other's choices.

You do seem to have a bit of a negative attitude to your DSD choice, (even though it is a good choice that millions of people are making for themselves) I wonder if you would feel the same if it was one of your own DC or your DH that had turned vegetarian?

Indeed Ronnie, don't be a luggard OP embrace this.

There are other forms of agriculture which are far more sustainable. Nobody is saying don't eat meat, just you dont need meat everyday. Red meat should be a once or twice a week thing.