DSD has decided to be vegetarian

[Iamnotagoddess]

We have 6 kids between us 3 have now left home.

DSD who is 14 has decided to be a vegetarian.

Tbh I feel really pissed off (secretly, I would not vocalise this).

I work full time and DH travels a long way to get them so I always prepare the meals and we are a real “meat eating” family and I am not used to cooking veggie meals (I do things to feed a lot of people like Lasange, Cottage Pie) and am not keen on using substitute meat for everyone and haven’t got time to piss about with a separate meal, but obviously can’t insist DSD eats meat although she does go through a lot of fads.

How have others found solutions to this?

Will she eat fish? We eat a lot of fish pie, dh is pescatarian rather than a proper veggie.

I would look at doing some batch cooking and freezing portions for her OP, it’s what I do to accommodate some people in our house being veggies and some eating meat.

Lots of veggie meals freeze really well. Also look at the quorn and Linda McCartney pies, pasties, escalopes etc as they’re nice and easy to pop in the oven with some mash potato or whatever.

How many nights a week does she eat with you? If it’s just a couple, I’d cook vegetarian for the family on those nights - doesn’t have to be Quorn or fake meat, lentil bolognese or cottage pie, chickpea curry, pasta and pesto, halloumi burgers, falafel wraps are all good. And it probably is a good thing to eat non-meat meals a few times a week anyway, from a general health perspective (and I say that as someone who is not a vegetarian)

Ok, if she happily ate chicken and laughed off your point about gelatine, doesn’t sound like she is very serious about it. So I think you should graciously accommodate her, until she gives it up. And be thankful it’s vegetarian not vegan. I’m from a mixed family, I really don’t think it’s that hard-eg we make a vegetable stir fry and then some add fried prawns and some add tofu. Or sausage and mash- just whack some Linda Mccartney ones in the oven. If she’s only over part of the week, I’m afraid I really don’t think it’d be that hard to accommodate her vegetarianism (if it lasts!). Even with the lasagne, one ready meal quorn one a week while the rest of you have a meat one won’t kill her (and even may encourage her to learn to cook )

I do like her.

I am not going to justify eating meat to anyone.

It’s a hassle of a Friday getting through all the traffic and getting a meal ready (and yes sometimes I do a slow cooker meal) and I am also busy on a Thursday night.

Never mind preparing different meals for one person.

Ok, if shes not there that often, it shouldn't be too hard. Make up veggie pasta sauces that can be substituted for meat ones, divide into portions and freeze, you just then have to microwave to go with the pasta everyone else is having.

For Chinese sauces, just pick up quick stirfry bags of veg, do a quick stirfry she can have with the rice you are all having.

You dont need to do a complex menu, just a few easy to knock together alternative meals, often overcook and freeze.

It might be a phase, it might not, if you make a big fuss, the bitterness might outlast her veggie phase.

No one is asking you to justify eating meat - just to justify why you can’t contemplate eating a meal without it.

My son was veggie for a year age 9. I respected his choice and I’m no cook but managed fine. He even did his ESB on vegetarianism (and got a merit).
You don’t have to eat vegetarian, but it would be a nice gesture to familial good will to make an effort to include something for her. But if you really can’t be bothered and you don’t want her cooking her own meals then there’s plenty of vegetarian ready meals out there that would suit. Just get a few in, get some frozen veggie sausage, then she has her option.
Try and be supportive of her choice, not just think what an inconvenience it is for you.

Either do meals where it's easy to substitute a non meat alternative so sausage and mash (veggie sausages for DSD), marinaded chicken breast, cous cous, roasted veg (substitute haloumi for DSD) or do a couple of big batches of something veggie and then freeze, chilli, spaghetti Bol, cottage pie etc.

If all else fails have a few ready meals in the freezer.

I do not want to eat Quorn
So dont eat. I e been a veggie for 25years and very rarely have it. It's not part if my meal planning.

Why should everyone else have to change their diet because she has decided to eat meat?
Is there anything wrong with reviewing your diet? I'm not by any means saying become veggie, just maybe ha e a few meat free meals when she visits.
Things like Paneer curries, seasonal stews and casseroles are filling and tasty for everyone.
Maybe it wont do any harm to reduce the meat in the diet in general.
Meals can be very easily adapted for one person being veggie ( I'm the only one that's veggie in my house)

Ps when you make meat cottage pie, literally just make a little extra mash, either she has it with veg sausages etc or she could grate cheese on, add chopped onion and peas, pop in the oven and its homity pie.

I think we need to know more about why she can't cook meals? Most 14yo have had some food tech meals at school. I have children in that age range and they can do 2-3 meals without help. Cooking could become an activity that she does with Dad?

My dd did raise the possibility of being vegan but she cba to look up recipes so abandoned that idea. While I'd be happy to adapt the odd meal (her brother is lactose and gluten intolerant so I adapt things like white sauces and gravy anyway), I wasn't going to forgo food I liked liked roasts, cheese and fish. The vegetables that she like are also pretty limited.

How often does she visit?

Being veggie is totally mainstream nowadays yabu.

Batch cooking is the way to go, you can buy individual freezer containers (foil with a little lid) I use these a lot for DD for quorn lasagne's, moussaka and that sort of thing.

There are also some good quality ready meals out there.

It doesn't take much adjusting to, and I say this as a committed carnivore.

Urgh I feel for you OP this would really annoy me too!
I would get some veggie microwave meals in which she can sort herself or batch cook a few portions! From what you have said it sounds like just another teenage phase so show it doesn't bother you and I'm sure she will go back to normal soon

Is it you that sends home cooked meals back to dm with them?

I'm sure she will go back to normal soon

How patronising.

Tell her what you will be cooking for the family. If it doesn't suit then stick a pizza in the oven and tell her to learn to cook.

I'd maybe make a quorn spaghetti Bol etc and freeze it in portions. Or if you're having chicken and mash etc have a quorn frozen fillet in the freezer.

When I was vegtn I didn't expect anyone to make me anything special.

Last night we had chicken and she ate it it

er... ok, I'm gonna say just have a range of stuff available & she can pick & choose which bits to have on her plate. All veg with some olive oil & cheese is a complete meal. I wouldn't put myself out more than having a range of items to assemble meal from.

I’m sure she’ll go back to normal soon.
I turned veggie at around the same age as dsd... 30 years ago. Still haven’t “gone back to normal.”

My DD is also veggie but it’s recent and she doesn’t live here.

She comes to eat and either we decide a compromise beforehand.

I think it’s just irritating me because she isn’t taking it seriously.

DH would not happily eat a meal with no meat tbh.

It’s probably just wider things that are irritating me.

I don’t send meals home, we do a lot of baking together and they take that home.

She has to wear glasses for the whiteboard at school, she wears them all the time even though I keep telling her it’s not good for her eyes.

She went though a phase of telling people on SM she was going to drink bleach (she was here and perfectly fine) we paid for counselling.

She is gay and we took her to pride today.

She got a new phone two months ago which is smashed (a replacement for the last one which was smashed).

Yeah it’s patronising to say she will go back to normal but the step daughter has eaten chicken and gelatine since “becoming vegetarian “ so she doesn’t sound that serious. I had lots of friends experiment with it for short periods as teens. It lasted with some but not all. Some comeback to it more seriously when they were older.I am a vegetarian since pre teen age so not vegetarian bashing!

You sound irritated by her and as if this is attention seeking. DS became veggie and we’ve reduced our meat. He loves pasta and veggie hot dogs with veg or crudités. If you’re really stuck get veggie micro meals. Beans on toast etc. It’s not that hard.

She’s 14, let her cook her own meals at f she wants something different.

I have a 14 year old DSD and she’s the fussiest eater - won’t eat anything the rest of the family eat. Her mum who works OT cooks her a separate meal every night. I work PT abs just don’t have the time to pander to one selective eater. So if she wants something different she has to make the afford - rather than the restaurant cater to her every whim.