DSD has decided to be vegetarian

[Iamnotagoddess]

We have 6 kids between us 3 have now left home.

DSD who is 14 has decided to be a vegetarian.

Tbh I feel really pissed off (secretly, I would not vocalise this).

I work full time and DH travels a long way to get them so I always prepare the meals and we are a real “meat eating” family and I am not used to cooking veggie meals (I do things to feed a lot of people like Lasange, Cottage Pie) and am not keen on using substitute meat for everyone and haven’t got time to piss about with a separate meal, but obviously can’t insist DSD eats meat although she does go through a lot of fads.

How have others found solutions to this?

I think that this is an opportunity for her to explore the fact that she is absolutely fine to be her own person but that she needs to accept some of the consequences (including hard work consequences of being different to the family but also good health/environmental consequences). So ImogenTubbs is absolutely right. Choose some recipes with her that freeze well (many mentioned above), support her in cooking them and doling them out in freezer portions. She'll either stick at it, or not.

Also, do bear in mind that families have different norms - I have several friends angry that their 'awkward' partner insists on meat being needed to make a 'real' meal when they see vege-based diets as the appropriate norm. Not a criticism of your diet, but this is wider than one teenager's behaviour.

So op when you say How have others found solutions to this?

What you mean is "how can I force DSD to eat me?".

Lots of people have offered cooking advice and solutions but really you're just unhappy about the vegetarianism, unhappy about the pan-sexuality, unhappy about the suicide threats and the phone and everything else that DSD does or doesn't do that irritates you (and of you're honest it sounds like there's a lot).

She's 14 and trying to find her place in the world and by the sounds of it struggling a bit. Given that you only need to pick up a couple of microwave meals, this particular "fad" has next to no impact on you.

*eat meat

I had exactly this situation and cooked veggie dinners whenever dsd visited. It’s really not an issue is it? It sounds like you might be annoyed by other things regarding your dh? If it’s just the veggie thing then maybe cook a huge veggie lasagne once and freeze it into individual portions every time you see her. Personally I wanted my dsd to feel welcomed and nurtured so I made the extra effort twice a month. Or suggest that your dh does it

Get quorn nuggets/ cottage pies/ sausages/ fish fingers etc. Put it in the oven and serve with potatos/rice/chips and whatever the family is having.

Better yet - teach the 14 year old to use the oven and she can do it herself.

Also spinach lasagne is very tasty and easy to make and a good alternative to the meat one.

Also maybe get the 14 year old to make a meal for the family to help you out. Pasta with tomato souce is easy and she should be able to manage that.

check that she eats quorn before getting any - I am allergic (sit on the loo for a couple of hours type allergic), veggie DD is not that keen on it either.

@Theworldcouldbemymollusc

She does feel welcomed and as previously said it’s the “fads” that do my head in and to me (until proved otherwise) this is another which she isn’t totally committed to.

I actually have a good relationship with her but she is one of those kids who is a drama queen. She told all her friends on Instagram she had drank bleach when she was happily on a day out with us and this sparked utter chaos as her friends were so worried about her. So if I sound irritated that is why.

I was veggie, now vegan. Really, having omnivores police or query what you’re eating is very tiresome. It will take her time to learn to cut out all meat derivatives like gelatine- and she may decide she doesn’t want to, just as she may be happy wearing leather etc etc. Any reduction in consumption will have health and environmental benefits so it’s up to her to decide what her ethical lines are. I think it’s really sad she’s trying to do something and you’re negging her on her learning curve. How would you feel if you were trying to lose weight and she commented when you treated yourself? Or if you broke and had a g&t in dry January? I imagine you’d tell her it was pretty rude.

Op I don’t eat meat, I now find cooking without meat easier and quicker than for the rest of the family.
Happy to give you 5 or so recipes that are dead easy and you could make them while cooking a normal meal for the rest of your family.
Perhaps you could get your DSD to help you prep dinner working alongside you and making her own portion under your guidance?
For example you make cottage pie, she takes her own portion of potato on the side, then when the pie is in the oven you give her a pan and a ready made (bagged) veg stir fry and let her fry it , add some pine nuts, soy sauce , green onions on top.
You literally wouldn’t need to do anything , just watch her.
She’d probably enjoy it.
Let me know if I can be of help and share some recipes.

Thank you

Why not sit down with her and make a plan of things she can eat, meal ideas? Cook them together or leave her to it make it herself. She's 14 not 4 so I'm sure she's more than capable to make some easy meals such a pasta and sauce, stuffed mushrooms/pepper etc. Linda McCartney makes excellent veggie options which are to die for (no, I'm not a vegetarian) and quorn makes meat free nuggets that taste almost like McDonald's chicken nuggets. Fad or not you need to be supportive. If your dead set against her cooking her own meals then why not make make a big batch of meat free cottage pie/lasagne and freeze? And keep some meat free burgers/sausages in the freezer handy for quick meals.

Update.

This weekend she had Quorn burgers and Linda McCartney sausages and burgers.

She doesn’t like the Linda McCartney stuff 🙈🙈

I have some frozen Quorn which I will make a Lasange with and when she said it was just vegans who needed to check ice cream was suitable I very nicely explained why it wasn’t.

Her sister was an absolute toe rag and kept taunting her with some chicken during a BBQ.