How much influence does SM have?

[busybrown]

DS has had a SM in his life from day dot (more or less), I fear I see her influence in DS more and more, I'm struggling with it. Surely it should just be me and his dad who influence his upbringing. I fear she is pushing her interests into him too much and I don't know if this is normal or appropriate. What are your experiences ?!

SD no need busy is a troll. Their other thread was deleted as she's a pbp

@myrtleWilson- thanks. To be honest- troll is better than someone that bloody miserable, making their child's life a misery!

Op I haven't read other threads of yours so I only have this thread to go on but a few things stick out for me

1. everything is about you and your feelings and how you think things should be
2. why has she blocked you? What has gone on that would make her go to that extreme
3. you sound ridiculous regarding only having you and his dad involved. Your opening post says she has been involved since he was a baby, therefore she has every right to an opinion regardless of whether you like it or not

I am a step mum. Have been for nearly half the kids lives. Both kids have discussed their GCSE options with me, my step son is currently looking at his a level options and has openly discussed his options and asked both mine and his dad's advice and opinion. Like you his mum hates it and me. I have never done a thing to upset her, I was always respectful and am now no contact unless an emergency because like you she has an obsession with seeing me as the bad guy.

Dss talks to me because in his words I listen to him. I don't bully him or pull rank and tell him what he is going to do. We chat about what options are out there, I tell him what I think he needs to consider and advise him to investigate his options fully.

For example, his dm is adamant he goes to college and does a vocational course involving computers. Dss wants to do something techy I don't understand at uni that will hopefully lead to a programming type job. My advice to him was to look at uni courses that appealed and what their entry requirements were and then use that to start looking closer at his options. Uni want a levels so he has decided on a local school sixth form. Mum is livid and like you telling anyone that will listen that I am the spawn of saturn and have no right to discuss/influence Dss.

Have I done something wrong? Have I harmed my step son or have I helped him to make an informed choice?

You need to step back. His step mum hasn't done anything wrong. A park run isn't exactly child abuse. You say yourself that he chooses to go because he doesn't want to be at home alone. That's not his step mum's issues, that is his and probably him following your lead.