I hate my step kids!

[Tappergirl]

They live with us full time, are parasites, and have ruined my relationship with my husband. Now though, I blame it on him for being spineless and taking every spat as my fault. I dont want to walk away but I can not see another option :-(

awww you guys and there's me thinking you were all step mother bashers

Oh I see what you mean Wakey*. He's a bit of a shadowy figure isn't he?

TBH the whole thing sounds so weird, and is so sketchily and erratically described, it's hard to comment. It is like a jigsaw with at least one piece missing.

My fault Alita I wasn't clear.

This is just a rare inversion of the norm Maryz. Everything in here gets coloured.

Perp

I think I have been lucky. My DH is very supportive all round. Then again I never went in to this with an agenda (not saying anyone else does on here). I would never ask him to choose between me or any of his children.
We don't always agree when it comes to parenting but we want the same fundamental outcome. For all our Dc's to be loved an happy.

I also never resent/resented the time or money he spent on SDC's. I never saw them as guests or interlopers they were/are family in fact I was the guest/interloper in the beginning.

Their teenage years weren't brilliant but I have no doubt our other DC's will be just as pleasant nightmare teenagers when they reach that age. So it was kind of helpful to already have gained some experience

Good evening Tapper I see you are well.

Your social skills really do worsen in the evening OP

Tapper have you been 'at a musical' again?

This is it you see. Brdgrl et al think we hate ALL stepmothers for being stepmothers and that is her immediate response to anyone who tries to say "steady on that reaction to your step child is wrong". If you disagree you are told to get off the board, accused of trolling and bullying, asked why you are even on the thread at all, credentials demanded etc and it's immediate there's no discussion, straight for the jugular.

I couldn't care less about whether a woman is a stepmother, my SIL is a stepmother and her step son is part of our family as though he is her own child, it never occurred to any of us that it would be otherwise. What I care about is threads where step children are absolutely vilified and weird aspersions are cast on tiny little girls wanting to be close to their fathers.

I had stopped challenging those kinds of statements simply because I didn't want the grief from brdgrl, I know two posters who have been banned after arguing with her on similar threads. This thread has changed my mind about avoiding that now.

There are lovely stepmothers as evidenced on this thread and there are awful ones as evidenced on this thread. Like ALL kinds of parent. There's plenty of threads that are totally valid and reasonable on SP but every now and then there is a completely hateful one that need voices of reason on them and they shouldn't be left unchallenged because one or two "Gate Keepers" have decided what being a step parent means and attack anyone with an opposing view.

Lordy! Is it that time of night already?

Been on the lash again Tapper?

What a miserable soul you are.

If you disagree you are told to get off the board, accused of trolling and bullying, asked why you are even on the thread at all, credentials demanded etc and it's immediate there's no discussion, straight for the jugular.

Yep and it's the only board I can think of where ordering posters off boards is tolerated.

What's worrying is that new stepmums turn up here looking for advice.

My SD's teen years were awful at times.

Truly, truly awful.

We had so many problems that I just couldn't foresee.

Never, ever, ever would I ask or expect DH to be anything other than the best possible father he could be to her during this time.

We have three together. If he hadn't treated her as a parent should a child, I wouldn't have trusted him to co-parent our children together.

I wouldn't want to co-parent with them.

Don't need to read through your pathetic little posts, bunch of hyenas . Hope your husbands are happy watch out someone may be screwing them whilst you are here.

Do you kiss your husband with that mouth?!

Considering he is sat at the side of me I would like to think I would notice

Tapper do you feel anything the next day after one of your threads? Is this why you name change?

There are 3 options

1. leave and allow all parties involved to get on with their lives. Hell, you can spend every evening in a nice, tidy house with no fear of any awkward, annoying, needy young people cluttering up your creative sex life
2. stay, act like a grown up, not a stroppy teenager and try to make things work for everyone's sake so you can all have a shot at some happiness
3. stay and play the martyr, making everyone else's life a misery too in the process

I don think tapper will gain any thing from this thread. In fact I think tapper is showing narc qualities.

Her response to a poster waaaaaay back , who was offering advice was that the poster was not 'endearing' herself to tapper

Why would any one feel that other posters had to 'win' her over?

I think I'd notice from a distance of three feet TBH Tapper

MN isn't that absorbing.