If you could send yourself a message in those first weeks of motherhood, what would it be? Win a £100 voucher and a Premium subscription to Calm!

[geemumsnet]

What do you remember of the very early days of motherhood? If you could send a message or share one piece of advice or encouragement with yourself at that time what would it be?

According to Calm's recent survey of over 2000 UK mums, nearly half of Mums are kept awake with stress and anxiety. That’s why Calm has teamed up with Mumsnet to support maternal mental health in the run-up to Mother’s Day.

We know motherhood can feel isolating at times (especially during those long, sleepless nights) but having a supportive community can make all the difference. That’s why we’re inviting you to be part of this conversation.

Plus, as a little thank you, everyone who comments on this thread by Friday 25th April will be in with the chance of winning an £100 VEX voucher and a Premium subscription to the Calm app. Four lucky runners-up will each win a Premium Calm subscription in our weekly prize draws! We'll be announcing winners each week. Our insight T&Cs apply .

So, if you could send a message to your past self in those first few weeks of motherhood, what would you say? Drop a comment below to share your words of encouragement and support with fellow mums!

Please leave your abusive husband so that you and your baby can live a better life. And definitely don’t marry him.

Just because women have had babies since the dawn of time, doesn't mean it's easy. Recognise how bloody awesome you are even if it doesn't always feel that way.

Yes, there is always something that needs doing but sleeping and eating are more important. One day you'll be able to drink a cup of tea while it's still hot and actually look back on these times fondly.

Dont be afraid to do what you feel is best despite what anyone else says.
The anyone else is usually your mother or mother in law. Take it on board and think about it, then follow your gut. I’d rather be wrong through my own faults than someone else’s.

Breathe, a lot, learn how to control yourself now when everything seems to be turning to shit. You’ll be needing that in the future.
Love that wee baby as much as you want. No baby has ever been spoiled with love.
Take photos, print them out and write notes to go along with them. Chronicle their first words, their first steps, sometimes those things disappear in the haze of it all.
Take time for yourself, even if just in little ways, make sure you are surviving as well.
It’s ok not to enjoy every minute, that’s an impossibility. It’s hard work being a mum. Feel each moment and understand that no moment will last forever.

Don't feel bad if you are enjoying these days.
Don't feel bad if your baby sleeps.

Take all the help you can get, take each day as a new day

Don’t try to be the perfect mum . It’s ok to be the best you can manage. On a nice day get out with the pram , it’s good for you and baby, the housework can wait. If you are struggling please tell someone . It’s the hardest job you will ever do and there is no shame in asking for help .

Housework can wait, visitors will understand - just be in the bubble of you and baby for the first few weeks. Don't worry about offending anyone, you and baby must take priority.

Feeding for this long isn’t normal. Read up on Tongue Tie.

That babies were never designed to sleep in cots!

I'd tell myself it'll be ok, it's not your fault that he cries so much and you're doing a great job.

Those early days were so lonely for me and very tough.

I would say that I am doing really well. Future me is proud of past me.
I would also say that all the women around you are still going to be around you nearly 30 years later and you will all go through so much together. You will find out what sisterhood means.
On a less serious note - yes you will be able to wee and poo normally soon 😬

It does get better, each bad phase comes with a good one and it’s okay to ask for help during these times, you don’t have to struggle alone when people are offering support.

Relax and enjoy it!

Trust your instincts.

Your baby needs people - keep friendships and family near to enrich your baby’s life.

You are a great mum and you know your baby better than anyone. Ask for advice, but trust your instincts. Let people help. Enjoy your baby L.

This is what you were meant for. This is who you are. This is the best thing you have done, and will do, in your lifetime. Just find Mumsnet and know that whatever you are going through (reflux, colic, intrusive thoughts, sleep deprivation, breast feeding troubles), there are thousands with you who have been through the same. Hard to believe it now but one day you will be here, trying with your very best words, to pick those new mums up in their darkest hour, telling them they are doing an amazing job, telling them they are heroes, just as other women did for you.

Ask for help and support rather than expecting to be a super mum from the off.

do your best to get outside every day. Even if it’s just a walk to the corner shop. It will help

Use the pick up stick, a basket of snacks, a flask of tea and stay on the sofa for a while and don't lawn mower your garden 4 days after a c section because your neighbour complained your grass was a bit too long.

Fed is best. There is a lot of pressure to breast feed, don’t punish yourself if you can’t. Feed them whatever way you can.

Listen to your instincts. You may not have done this before, but if something doesn't look/feel right, get it checked out asap.

You need to take care of yourself as well. Remember, you cannot pour from an empty cup.

Eat well and sleep when baby sleeps and it will make the first few days so much easier, and breast feeding will nourish baby if you eat well.

Do what works for you.
Babies don’t need a bath every night
They don’t need fancy outfits just baby grows they keep them snug and feeling secure.
Theres NO competition, you’re winning !!
look after yourself too
Sleep, keep hydrated and walk outside with the baby every day !!
Everything lasts only a short time so make the most of it - don’t worry about tomorrow, it’s going to come whether you’re ready or not.
Do everything you can,try everything and enjoy it.
join baby clubs you’ll find long term mum friends there too and you’re all paddling canoes !!
it’s not just your baby !! Let other people do the tough stuff too - and, Dads don’t ‘babysit’ it’s called parenting !!

Don't compare your baby to anyone else's. Yes, the others may all seem to sleep more, cry less, gain weight faster, be more content, but no one else's baby will ever compare to yours. One day, your baby will be your 3 year old... 5 year old... your 10 year old, and you wouldn't trade them for anyone else's.